PaperclipGod
Banned
So, the sister of a friend of mine just had a kid. My friend is babysitting it most days. The thing is just a few months old, and does nothing but scream, shit, and projectile-vomit. However, every time I see her (or anyone else who's there) with the kid, everyone can't stop going on about how incredibly awesome the thing is. Even when someone's holding it and it regurgitates half-digested mammary-milk onto their shoulder, the reaction is "AWWW, BABY ARE YOU OK? YOU SO CUTE OMG I LOVE TEH BABY."
Seriously, why would anyone ever choose to create one of these monstrosities? They're completely useless, and are just a crapload of work to maintain. Not only that, but you're responsible for them for the next EIGHTEEN YEARS, more if you're unlucky! Let's not also forget that almost as soon as they can control their own bodily functions and not need you to scrub the poop from their ass, they become angsty, hormone-infused teenagers that hate their parents and spend their days trying to catch std's and make more of their kind.
Honestly, with nearly 7 billion people on the planet, why is each new baby greeted with trumpets and confetti? Why not adopt a kid that's already here but doesn't have parents? Why not donate the million you're going to spend raising your own useless pile of walking flesh to a charity which improves the lives of kids already here?
The other day I suggested to my friend and a couple other people that a perfect baby play-pen would be a plywood box with a dog bed in it. Or even just a big laundry basket with a dog bed in it. And the reaction I got was like... violently angry. But how is a dog bed in a laundry basket different than what's sold at Babies 'R Us, other than the psychedelic decorations and an extra $100?
Seriously, why would anyone ever choose to create one of these monstrosities? They're completely useless, and are just a crapload of work to maintain. Not only that, but you're responsible for them for the next EIGHTEEN YEARS, more if you're unlucky! Let's not also forget that almost as soon as they can control their own bodily functions and not need you to scrub the poop from their ass, they become angsty, hormone-infused teenagers that hate their parents and spend their days trying to catch std's and make more of their kind.
Honestly, with nearly 7 billion people on the planet, why is each new baby greeted with trumpets and confetti? Why not adopt a kid that's already here but doesn't have parents? Why not donate the million you're going to spend raising your own useless pile of walking flesh to a charity which improves the lives of kids already here?
The other day I suggested to my friend and a couple other people that a perfect baby play-pen would be a plywood box with a dog bed in it. Or even just a big laundry basket with a dog bed in it. And the reaction I got was like... violently angry. But how is a dog bed in a laundry basket different than what's sold at Babies 'R Us, other than the psychedelic decorations and an extra $100?