Avoiding Alcohol Advice Needed

AgaBoogaBoo

Lifer
Feb 16, 2003
26,108
5
81
A friend of mine asked for help because a friend of his at school asked him if he wants to come over to his house tomorrow after school and drink something with alcohol, didn't specifiy what it was. Anyway, he asked me for advice and I told him to flat out say that's not the kind of person he is and doesn't want to do that.

By the way, these are 16 year olds and this kid isn't the kind that would want to drink. Please, only reply if you're serious.

What should he say to him tomorrow?
 

sygyzy

Lifer
Oct 21, 2000
14,001
4
76
Why do you have to say anything to him? This does not seem that complex. Tell him not to go drink.
 

McCarthy

Platinum Member
Oct 9, 1999
2,567
0
76
Tell him to tell the other guy (feels like I'm playing telephone here, too many connections) that he's not interested. Just like that, simple and to the point. Don't go about making up a story about having to go to soccer practice or see the dentist. When I was in HS I didn't drink, couple of my so called friends at the time gave me a little ribbing, but not nearly as much as I expected. After making it clear it was never an issue again, still got invited to parties as much as before with the only difference being I was the designated driver shuttling people home at the end of most.
 

psydancerqt

Golden Member
Mar 31, 2003
1,110
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why is he going? he's old enough to know how to say 'no' if he wants to put himself in that situation
 

tweakmm

Lifer
May 28, 2001
18,436
4
0
Your friend: Nah man, I'm straight on the sauce, I'm not much of a drinker.

End of story.

If they are his friends they will be cool with his decisions and would be assholes to give him more than a lighthearted chiding.
Or he could try something new, have a few drinks and chill with his friends. Why again were you brought into this let alone the whole of the off-topic community?
 

KarenMarie

Elite Member
Sep 20, 2003
14,372
6
81
my daughter and i alway had a code when she was a teenager.

If there was anything that she did not want to do or was in a situation that she felt uncomfortable in, she would use me as an excuse. Either tell her friends that she had to be home at a certain time, or she would call me and hint that she needed to use the code and i would tell her to tell then I wanted her home.

that way she was able to avoid what she did not want to do, but still look semi kewl!

:)
 

SackOfAllTrades

Diamond Member
May 7, 2000
4,040
2
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Originally posted by: KarenMarie
my daughter and i alway had a code when she was a teenager.

If there was anything that she did not want to do or was in a situation that she felt uncomfortable in, she would use me as an excuse. Either tell her friends that she had to be home at a certain time, or she would call me and hint that she needed to use the code and i would tell her to tell then I wanted her home.

that way she was able to avoid what she did not want to do, but still look semi kewl!

:)

Daughter: Mom, I need to use the code?
Mom: You mean the gynecologist?
Daughter: No! Eww gross...
Mom: :eek:
 

AgaBoogaBoo

Lifer
Feb 16, 2003
26,108
5
81
Originally posted by: tweakmm
Your friend: Nah man, I'm straight on the sauce, I'm not much of a drinker.

End of story.

If they are his friends they will be cool with his decisions and would be assholes to give him more than a lighthearted chiding.
Or he could try something new, have a few drinks and chill with his friends. Why again were you brought into this let alone the whole of the off-topic community?

Well, I thought I might asked for other opinions. He wasn't seeming to want to just say no straight out. Honestly guys, I'm just trying to help a friend and since I'm 15, I haven't had much experience yet with drinking...
 

PowerMacG5

Diamond Member
Apr 14, 2002
7,701
0
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You know, in all of my life in High School, I have never had a problem avoiding alcohol. If you don't want to use it, just don't.
 

KarenMarie

Elite Member
Sep 20, 2003
14,372
6
81
Originally posted by: SackOfAllTrades
Originally posted by: KarenMarie
my daughter and i alway had a code when she was a teenager.

If there was anything that she did not want to do or was in a situation that she felt uncomfortable in, she would use me as an excuse. Either tell her friends that she had to be home at a certain time, or she would call me and hint that she needed to use the code and i would tell her to tell then I wanted her home.

that way she was able to avoid what she did not want to do, but still look semi kewl!

:)

Daughter: Mom, I need to use the code?
Mom: You mean the gynecologist?
Daughter: No! Eww gross...
Mom: :eek:

LOL LOL LOL!! that is cute! My daughter (who has been lurking on this forum for a while) thought it was funny also. But actually it went a bit more like this:

daughter calls me up...

Daughter: Hi Mum, what time do you want me home? (who has never had a curfew)
Me: Ahhh... something going on there? you need to use me as an excuse?
Daughter: Yep, that's right, Mum
Me: Ok, tell you friends that I said you MUST come home right now!!
Daughter: Aww Mum, you ruin everything (whispers..thanks, mum)

:) :) :)

 

tweakmm

Lifer
May 28, 2001
18,436
4
0
Originally posted by: AgaBooga
Well, I thought I might asked for other opinions. He wasn't seeming to want to just say no straight out. Honestly guys, I'm just trying to help a friend and since I'm 15, I haven't had much experience yet with drinking...
There's nothing wrong with saying no flat out. For the first few years of being a teen I turned down a number of substances on many occasions and I didn't get made fun of or mocked. My friends were cool with my decision as I was cool with theirs, at the time I didn't want to do drugs but I had no problem with other people doing them.
 

AgaBoogaBoo

Lifer
Feb 16, 2003
26,108
5
81
Originally posted by: KarenMarie
Originally posted by: SackOfAllTrades
Originally posted by: KarenMarie
my daughter and i alway had a code when she was a teenager.

If there was anything that she did not want to do or was in a situation that she felt uncomfortable in, she would use me as an excuse. Either tell her friends that she had to be home at a certain time, or she would call me and hint that she needed to use the code and i would tell her to tell then I wanted her home.

that way she was able to avoid what she did not want to do, but still look semi kewl!

:)

Daughter: Mom, I need to use the code?
Mom: You mean the gynecologist?
Daughter: No! Eww gross...
Mom: :eek:

LOL LOL LOL!! that is cute! My daughter (who has been lurking on this forum for a while) thought it was funny also. But actually it went a bit more like this:

daughter calls me up...

Daughter: Hi Mum, what time do you want me home? (who has never had a curfew)
Me: Ahhh... something going on there? you need to use me as an excuse?
Daughter: Yep, that's right, Mum
Me: Ok, tell you friends that I said you MUST come home right now!!
Daughter: Aww Mum, you ruin everything (whispers..thanks, mum)

:) :) :)

lol, you told your daughter about the forums... haha, she's not gonna be the same after reading posts from ATOT ;) j/k
 

KarenMarie

Elite Member
Sep 20, 2003
14,372
6
81
lol, you told your daughter about the forums... haha, she's not gonna be the same after reading posts from ATOT j/k

She heard me laughing a few times and wanted to know what was up. So, I showed her. And since this site is in my Fave's list, she came back a few times.... she rolled her eyes at a few ppl, hooted at others, and now gets what it is all about.

She has quickly pick up at the acronyms!

:)

edit: she actually called someone an ASSHAT the other day!
:) :) :)
 

sciencewhiz

Diamond Member
Jun 30, 2000
5,885
8
81
Originally posted by: KarenMarie

edit: she actually called someone an ASSHAT the other day!
:) :) :)

That's something to be proud of?
rolleye.gif
 

KarenMarie

Elite Member
Sep 20, 2003
14,372
6
81
Originally posted by: sciencewhiz
Originally posted by: KarenMarie

edit: she actually called someone an ASSHAT the other day!
:) :) :)

That's something to be proud of?
rolleye.gif


never said proud, did i?

She is 19yr old and that is hardly the worst thing that ppl say. I found it funny cause this forum is the only other place ihave ever heard asshat before. I think I just learned how it got started!


 

Kango

Member
Nov 20, 1999
166
0
0
If your friend still wants to hang out with the guy inviting him, he should just say that he's not interested in drinking but he still wants to hang out, and alcohol being present doesn't bother him.

If alcohol being present worries him, he shouldn't hang out at all.

There are plenty of non-drinkers who still enjoy being around the drunks. One of my friends in college doesn't drink, so we've assigned him the role of "Group Historian", since he's the only one who remembers all the stuff that happens on drinking nights. He takes great pictures that we don't remember.

Just don't have the impression that people who drink are evil. When I was in high school I didn't drink, and I actually disliked all of the kids who drank. I thought they were "bad people" or something. Once I got to college I QUICKLY learned to enjoy drinking, and actually realized that a lot of the people I disliked during high school were genuinely cool people.

Drinking isn't innately good or bad, although depending on how people do it, it can lead to fun or terrible things. Be responsible and respectful and it can be pretty cool.

And no, I'm not saying you should drink if you're not ready to... but don't knock it til you've tried it either! Just do what makes you feel comfortable.
 

AgaBoogaBoo

Lifer
Feb 16, 2003
26,108
5
81
Originally posted by: Kango
Just don't have the impression that people who drink are evil. When I was in high school I didn't drink, and I actually disliked all of the kids who drank. I thought they were "bad people" or something. Once I got to college I QUICKLY learned to enjoy drinking, and actually realized that a lot of the people I disliked during high school were genuinely cool people.

Drinking isn't innately good or bad, although depending on how people do it, it can lead to fun or terrible things. Be responsible and respectful and it can be pretty cool.

And no, I'm not saying you should drink if you're not ready to... but don't knock it til you've tried it either! Just do what makes you feel comfortable.

That makes sense because in HS the kids know very little how to handle themselves and just do it because they think they can handle it and all and it doesn't matter. Once you're in college, it probably seems more fun because you're more mature and know that it's not like drinking coke.
 

Koing

Elite Member <br> Super Moderator<br> Health and F
Oct 11, 2000
16,843
2
0
I was drinking at 15yrs. I went out to clubs and sh!t. It is alright as long as you don't drive or do anything too crazy. Just don't go overboard with drinking and at least make sure you are around guys that you trust. You will spill your guts out and THEN some at least once or a few times.

I haven't drunk anything in the past 4 months and I'm 20 now. Legal drinking age in England is 18. I can't be assed to drink at times and others I like to get a bit of a buzz. Others I like to get completely sh!t faced.

Had some scary nights and bad bad OD on alcohol and paid the price and felt like crawling up and dying :(. On a few occasions I stopped boozing for a few months lol.

Koing