What do you mean have I ever been, I've always been. It's never passed, although I don't think I will ever do it, there never is a day that goes by without me at least thinking that I might be better off if I ended it, but then I think of my girl, my animals, and anyone who cares for me and that is enough to make me decide against it. If you have anyone you care for, let that be your reason to live if not for yourself. That is what I do, and from the looks of it, I will ALWAYS be suicidal. I think it's inherited.
I've tried anti-depressants, drugs of all types(I've been on methadone for four years since I can't seem to get away from heroin without it), and nothing seems to work. Most people have no idea about how seriously depressed I am, and certainly not about my past heroin use. It sucks to have to hide everything about yourself or fear being judged by all of your peers and co-workers. Such is life. Don't do something you don't think you'd wish you'd not done in the morning, when the sun is shining and the birds are singing.
BTW, I have been very close to doing it, and once was walked in on while I was hanging by my brother. The second time I was debating whether or not to do it and had a shotgun in my hand, and the same brother pulled up and I had to rush and dismantle the gun and put it away quickly since it was his gun and his house and I didn't even belong there. Don't ask.