Any bible experts here ?

[Doomer]

I heard that the Bible has this to say about masturbation :

"It is better to put it in a whore than to spill it on a rock."

Anybody know if this is actually in the Bible abd if so, where ?

Thanks

 

[Fausto]

This should be good...

/lawn chair

/beers

/popcorn

/applies sunscreen


Have at it, guys.

 

[DivideBYZero]

I doubt it. I'll laugh my ass off if it does tho...

 

[Orsorum]

Originally posted by: Fausto
This should be good...

/lawn chair

/beers

/popcorn

/applies sunscreen


Have at it, guys.

I wanted to apply your sunscreen.

 

[Zysoclaplem]

What about a sock? For God's sake man, does it mention a sock?

 

[kranky]

That's not in the Bible.

 

[DivideBYZero]

Whores did always get a good rep in the Bible...

 

[Fausto]

Originally posted by: Orsorum

Originally posted by: Fausto
This should be good...

/lawn chair

/beers

/popcorn

/applies sunscreen


Have at it, guys.

I wanted to apply your sunscreen.

You'll have to clear that with MrsFausto.

 

[Orsorum]

Originally posted by: Fausto

Originally posted by: Orsorum

Originally posted by: Fausto
This should be good...

/lawn chair

/beers

/popcorn

/applies sunscreen


Have at it, guys.

I wanted to apply your sunscreen.

You'll have to clear that with MrsFausto.

Heck, she offered to do the cleanup.

 

[Fausto]

Originally posted by: Orsorum

Originally posted by: Fausto

Originally posted by: Orsorum

Originally posted by: Fausto
This should be good...

/lawn chair

/beers

/popcorn

/applies sunscreen


Have at it, guys.

I wanted to apply your sunscreen.

You'll have to clear that with MrsFausto.

Heck, she offered to do the cleanup.

Okey-doke...now we just need someone to hold the camera.....where's Pyonir?

 

[MercenaryForHire]

Originally posted by: Fausto

Originally posted by: Orsorum

Originally posted by: Fausto

Originally posted by: Orsorum

Originally posted by: Fausto
This should be good...

/lawn chair

/beers

/popcorn

/applies sunscreen


Have at it, guys.

I wanted to apply your sunscreen.

You'll have to clear that with MrsFausto.

Heck, she offered to do the cleanup.

Okey-doke...now we just need someone to hold the camera.....where's Pyonir?

/sets up a tripod

I'll spot for him.

- M4H

 

[Hankerton]

Originally posted by: Doomer
I heard that the Bible has this to say about masturbation :

"It is better to put it in a whore than to spill it on a rock."

Anybody know if this is actually in the Bible abd if so, where ?

Thanks

I just wanna know where you heard this. That would be awesoem if it was true.

 

[Zysoclaplem]

Originally posted by: Fausto

Originally posted by: Orsorum

Originally posted by: Fausto

Originally posted by: Orsorum

Originally posted by: Fausto
This should be good...

/lawn chair

/beers

/popcorn

/applies sunscreen


Have at it, guys.

I wanted to apply your sunscreen.

You'll have to clear that with MrsFausto.

Heck, she offered to do the cleanup.

Okey-doke...now we just need someone to hold the camera.....where's Pyonir?

I feel like a 3rd wheel here. What can I do?

 

[Fausto]

Originally posted by: Zysoclaplem

Originally posted by: Fausto

Originally posted by: Orsorum

Originally posted by: Fausto

Originally posted by: Orsorum

Originally posted by: Fausto
This should be good...

/lawn chair

/beers

/popcorn

/applies sunscreen


Have at it, guys.

I wanted to apply your sunscreen.

You'll have to clear that with MrsFausto.

Heck, she offered to do the cleanup.

Okey-doke...now we just need someone to hold the camera.....where's Pyonir?

I feel like a 3rd wheel here. What can I do?

Fluff the midgets?

 

[MrChad]

Genesis 38:8

Then Judah said to Onan, "Go in to your brother's wife, and perform the duty of a brother-in-law to her, and raise up offspring for your brother." 9 But Onan knew that the offspring would not be his; so when he went in to his brother's wife he spilled the semen on the ground, lest he should give offspring to his brother. 10 And what he did was displeasing in the sight of the LORD, and he slew him also.

 

[Doomer]

Originally posted by: Zysoclaplem
What about a sock? For God's sake man, does it mention a sock?

Did they have socks back then ?

:laugh:

 

[3chordcharlie]

I would not spill it on a rock
I could not, would not, in a sock
I could not do that to my c0ck
I choose the whore around the block!

 

[n0cmonkey]

Solomon?s well known carnal excesses sometimes give rise to ?proverbs? that he didn?t even utter. I?ve heard one elderly Christian, who was born in the early twentieth century, swear that ?somewhere in the Bible? it says, ?it is better to spill your seed in the belly of a whore, than to spill it on the ground.? I don?t know if that quote was ever printed anywhere, but it is certainly not biblical, nor is it one of Solomon?s proverbs. It may be a 19th century mis-interpretation of the story of Onan in Genesis that was commonly cited in the 19th and early 20th century:

?And Judah said unto Onan, Go in unto thy brother?s wife, and marry her, and raise up see to thy brother. And Onan knew that the seed should not be his; and it came to pass, when he went unto his brother?s wife, that he spilled it on the ground, lest that he should give seed to his brother. And the thing he did displeased the LORD: wherefore he slew him also.?
--The Bible, Genesis 38:8-10

The unbiblical and anti-Christian ?proverb? the elderly Christian cited without a doubt gave license to many married men of his time to have adulterous affairs with ?whores,? which Christ explicitly condemned, rather than ?spill their seed on the ground? with either masturbation or ?wet dreams,? neither of which has ever been mentioned in the Bible

 

[Zysoclaplem]

Originally posted by: Fausto

Originally posted by: Zysoclaplem

Originally posted by: Fausto

Originally posted by: Orsorum

Originally posted by: Fausto

Originally posted by: Orsorum

Originally posted by: Fausto
This should be good...

/lawn chair

/beers

/popcorn

/applies sunscreen


Have at it, guys.

I wanted to apply your sunscreen.

You'll have to clear that with MrsFausto.

Heck, she offered to do the cleanup.

Okey-doke...now we just need someone to hold the camera.....where's Pyonir?

I feel like a 3rd wheel here. What can I do?

Fluff the midgets?

Gee Whiz Fausto! Why do I always get stuck fluffing midgets, while you guys get to have all the fun?

 

[Siva]

Originally posted by: MrChad
Genesis 38:8

Then Judah said to Onan, "Go in to your brother's wife, and perform the duty of a brother-in-law to her, and raise up offspring for your brother." 9 But Onan knew that the offspring would not be his; so when he went in to his brother's wife he spilled the semen on the ground, lest he should give offspring to his brother. 10 And what he did was displeasing in the sight of the LORD, and he slew him also.

That's what instantly came to mind when this question was asked. I don't think that means its better to have sex with a whore than masturbate, just don't pull out when you're supposed to get a girl pregnant, then you're just being selfish.

 

[Zysoclaplem]

Originally posted by: Doomer

Originally posted by: Zysoclaplem
What about a sock? For God's sake man, does it mention a sock?

Did they have socks back then ?

:laugh:

Whew! I'm home free. Heaven, here I come. No pun intended. Or was it?

 

[Fausto]

Originally posted by: Zysoclaplem

Originally posted by: Fausto

Originally posted by: Zysoclaplem

Originally posted by: Fausto

Originally posted by: Orsorum

Originally posted by: Fausto

Originally posted by: Orsorum

Originally posted by: Fausto
This should be good...

/lawn chair

/beers

/popcorn

/applies sunscreen


Have at it, guys.

I wanted to apply your sunscreen.

You'll have to clear that with MrsFausto.

Heck, she offered to do the cleanup.

Okey-doke...now we just need someone to hold the camera.....where's Pyonir?

I feel like a 3rd wheel here. What can I do?

Fluff the midgets?

Gee Whiz Fausto! Why do I always get stuck fluffing midgets, while you guys get to have all the fun?

Look, you have to work your way up the food chain here. Orsorum used to be a midget fluffer, and now look where he is. Pay your dues and I promise I'll take care of you.

 

[Zysoclaplem]

Originally posted by: Fausto

Originally posted by: Zysoclaplem

Originally posted by: Fausto

Originally posted by: Zysoclaplem

Originally posted by: Fausto

Originally posted by: Orsorum

Originally posted by: Fausto

Originally posted by: Orsorum

Originally posted by: Fausto
This should be good...

/lawn chair

/beers

/popcorn

/applies sunscreen


Have at it, guys.

I wanted to apply your sunscreen.

You'll have to clear that with MrsFausto.

Heck, she offered to do the cleanup.

Okey-doke...now we just need someone to hold the camera.....where's Pyonir?

I feel like a 3rd wheel here. What can I do?

Fluff the midgets?

Gee Whiz Fausto! Why do I always get stuck fluffing midgets, while you guys get to have all the fun?

Look, you have to work your way up the food chain here. Orsorum used to be a midget fluffer, and now look where he is. Pay your dues and I promise I'll take care of you.

I guess. It's only a 19,000+ post difference. I don't know if I have that in me. At least I have my Pyonir. :heart:

 

[Blain]

It seems your stories have become mixed.
Genesis 38:6-10...
"6. And Judah took a wife for Er his firstborn, whose name was Tamar.
7. And Er, Judah's firstborn, was wicked in the sight of the LORD; and the LORD slew him.
8. And Judah said unto Onan, Go in unto thy brother's wife, and marry her, and raise up seed to thy brother.
9. And Onan knew that the seed should not be his; and it came to pass, when he went in unto his brother's wife, that he spilled it on the ground, lest that he should give seed to his brother.
10. And the thing which he did displeased the LORD: wherefore he slew him also."

By "spilling" his "seed" on the ground Onan was avoiding the responsibility he had to his late brother. He used his brother's wife as his own, but would not bring children up in his brother's name.

 

[Fausto]

Originally posted by: Zysoclaplem

Originally posted by: Fausto

Originally posted by: Zysoclaplem

Originally posted by: Fausto

Originally posted by: Zysoclaplem

Originally posted by: Fausto

Originally posted by: Orsorum

Originally posted by: Fausto

Originally posted by: Orsorum

Originally posted by: Fausto
This should be good...

/lawn chair

/beers

/popcorn

/applies sunscreen


Have at it, guys.

I wanted to apply your sunscreen.

You'll have to clear that with MrsFausto.

Heck, she offered to do the cleanup.

Okey-doke...now we just need someone to hold the camera.....where's Pyonir?

I feel like a 3rd wheel here. What can I do?

Fluff the midgets?

Gee Whiz Fausto! Why do I always get stuck fluffing midgets, while you guys get to have all the fun?

Look, you have to work your way up the food chain here. Orsorum used to be a midget fluffer, and now look where he is. Pay your dues and I promise I'll take care of you.

I guess. It's only a 19,000+ post difference. I don't know if I have that in me. At least I have my Pyonir. :heart:

You keep complaining and I'll demote you to Assistant Midget Fluffer Fluffer. :frown: