An admission, i screwed up many times, but it's hard not to

[XZeroII]

I'm not dumb, never have been, never will be... I definitely have above average intelligence and intellect. Don't associate grades with intelligence...

I have begun actually GOING to classes, it reflects in my grades this semester.

No offense but an intelligent person would not have flunked out of school twice. Grades certainly don't equate to intelligence, however they aren't completely unrelated.

Good to see that you've decided to start actually going to class, but until you admit that you're dumb and that you're fighting an uphill battle, you're just going to fail again.

Again, I don't mean any offense by what I'm saying. I just want to help.

 

[MikeMike]

No offense but an intelligent person would not have flunked out of school twice. Grades certainly don't equate to intelligence, however they aren't completely unrelated.

Good to see that you've decided to start actually going to class, but until you admit that you're dumb and that you're fighting an uphill battle, you're just going to fail again.

Again, I don't mean any offense by what I'm saying. I just want to help.

where have i said i failed out twice? perhaps you are the dumb one with an inability to read...

 

[SandEagle]

School isnt for everyone. Learn a trade, make money, have fun. Work to live, dont live to work.

 

[Nintendesert]

You sound like you need to join the Marines and get challenged in life. You have it too easy where you are.

 

[destrekor]

I have an idea, start trying in school. I suppose I'm not one to talk because I skated by with nearly no effort, but most people can't. How do you get an F if you're trying?

By telling yourself you're trying but in reality not exactly putting much effort.

I failed twice I think during school, maybe three times. Each class was Russian, they kicked my ass, but I can definitely admit now that I wasn't trying nearly enough.

I pushed on for all four years, and was motivated enough by various things to keep average. I maintained a High C/Low B average, and I am completely ready to admit I fucked up big time. I didn't study enough for sure, classes with "homework" I didn't put enough time into (or in the case of Russian, often didn't do), and various other things. I slacked off, big time.
I was motivated enough to get the degree, but that was about it.
Even worse to admit, is the degree was a bullshit B.A. degree, at least when looking at things in the grand scheme of things.

I should have taken a few years off after high school. I just wasn't motivated to do structured learning anymore. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love learning. I do a lot of research on various topics frequently, but I am thoroughly aware I just didn't want to do anymore school. I didn't appreciate it, and didn't sell it to myself much at all.

Sometime within the next decade, I want to return to school and either A) get a more focused undergrad degree (computer engineering or something along those lines), or B) work on a graduate degree.
I refuse to do this until I have a stable life, and can convince myself (and sell it to others) that further education will make me a better resource for employers. The key is, I just have to be motivated.

OP, I can completely understand you situation. Motivation for schooling is the biggest factor; most people, post-highschool, can learn just about any damn thing they set their mind too... being motivated for that is the key.

 

[destrekor]

No offense but an intelligent person would not have flunked out of school twice. Grades certainly don't equate to intelligence, however they aren't completely unrelated.

Good to see that you've decided to start actually going to class, but until you admit that you're dumb and that you're fighting an uphill battle, you're just going to fail again.

Again, I don't mean any offense by what I'm saying. I just want to help.

Being unintelligent and having low motivation are two entirely different things.
You can fail things and be incredibly intelligent. Intelligence requires motivation and dedication (motivation provides the spark for dedication) to actually shine, but you can find intelligent people who fail things quite frequently imho. Maybe they never got a degree or something, but getting grades and degrees isn't a requirement for intelligence.

You can be intelligent, have motivation to shine quite well in certain areas/concentrations, but then find yourself with no motivation and performing terribly at something else.

 

[fire400]

www.mindtools.com

secondly, stop feeling sorry for yourself. self-esteem issues, clearly. if you did well in high school, no reason why you shouldn't do well at a job or college - sounds like someone here misses their mommy or daddy?

minimize distractions. do one thing and do it well. make a list of the six most important things to do in the day, and get it done.

otherwise, I'm sure it's crossed your mind, enlist in the armed forces, full-active duty.

 

[destrekor]

You sound like you need to join the Marines and get challenged in life. You have it too easy where you are.

lol
That's part of the reason I joined the Army.
Sadly, ROTC is not necessarily the best route.

But, that's the past, and I still have a 4 month block of training to wrap this stage of my life up. Living and breathing it solid for 4 months straight, and only it (no other classes to speak of) is going to be refreshing, and a new environment... but still present a nice challenge, especially if I don't finish getting my act together.

Half my decision to join the military was simply because I feel it's what a man should do for his land, but the other half is the challenge and wake-up call. I know my faults, and help others find and fix their faults, but I'll be damned if I said solving my problems was anything other than a nightmare. One step at a time baby. One step at a time. Pretty soon I'll have no choice but to pick it up to double-time, but that'll be good.

 

[BoomerD]

Mike, there are two kinds of people in the world...

Those who fuck up occasionally and those who lie about it.

Accept that you're part of the first group and do not ever let yourself fall into the second group.

I've fucked up more in my life than I want to admit...but it happened, no sense lying about it, whining about any consequences or repercussions, and no sense trying to deny any of it...BUT, at the same time, while I may wish that I could have "undone" many of the fuck-ups, I haven't ever regretted trying.

(actually, there's only ONE fuck-up that was serious enough to bother me long term, and I still have an occasional nightmare about it.) The rest are just like smoke in the wind...poof...they're gone.

 

[MikeMike]

lol
That's part of the reason I joined the Army.
Sadly, ROTC is not necessarily the best route.

But, that's the past, and I still have a 4 month block of training to wrap this stage of my life up. Living and breathing it solid for 4 months straight, and only it (no other classes to speak of) is going to be refreshing, and a new environment... but still present a nice challenge, especially if I don't finish getting my act together.

Half my decision to join the military was simply because I feel it's what a man should do for his land, but the other half is the challenge and wake-up call. I know my faults, and help others find and fix their faults, but I'll be damned if I said solving my problems was anything other than a nightmare. One step at a time baby. One step at a time. Pretty soon I'll have no choice but to pick it up to double-time, but that'll be good.

I have family members that I can ask about this route (cousin works in the Pentagon, ex Ranger). And I have thought about this route, it would give me some necessary focus, as well as predetermined paths, and a daily schedule...

But that's my last resort...

 

[Imp]

Meh. I went into my 2 exams this past term with averages of 87% and 91.5%. After the exams, I expect low 70s. Slacked off, was just tired, and stopped keeping up. Screwed up all the stuff in the exam based on the last few weeks.

 

[BoomerD]

I have family members that I can ask about this route (cousin works in the Pentagon, ex Ranger). And I have thought about this route, it would give me some necessary focus, as well as predetermined paths, and a daily schedule...

But that's my last resort...

FWIW, it sounds like you just aren't motivated. That's one thing that drill instructors are EXCELLENT at doing...motivating...however, once you're out of boot camp/basic training, they don't follow you around to keep you motivated...and it's very easy to slip back into the same old "I don't really give a shit" routines...
Just joining the military won't turn you into a perfect person...there have always been tons of fuck-ups in the military...some of them excel at being military fuck-ups...and manage to stay in long enough to collect their pensions...