Am I the only one with parents like these??

[nativesunshine]

pssst....(K..this is gonna be a somewhat long rant

Am I the only one with parents like these??

More specifically, with a MOM like this??

I got into trouble (semi-big, dont' want to get into the details)...a couple weeks ago. Ever since then, she hasn't allowed me to do much..(like going out and stuff). Not to say that she hasn't let me AT all..but it takes a lot of convincing and sucking up for her to finally let me. Usually I bring my brother or sister into it and let them convince her for me.

My friends don't seem to understand that she's this way and I don't really want to like..make excuses for my mom. But it's getting quite ridiculous.

I was invited over my friend's house tonight for dinner....but I can't even work up the courage to ask my mom to let me go because not only will she say no..she'll start yelling at me about how i only want to go out. But hello..? it's summertime. when else would I be able to go out?

But anyway, my friend's all mad at me now. Claims he's not..but he is...won't even talk to me on the phone. Says he's annoyed and bothered...but THIS IS HOW MY MOTHER IS. He knows this...and yet he doesn't seem to understand. I know I messed up with her..and in order to get back her trust..I have to be the best damn little girl a parent could ask for. He doesn't understand that I have to do major sucking up to get her to trust me again.

Like i said, she doesn't forbid me from going out AT ALL...every once in a while she lets me...so it's not totally unfair that sometimes she just doesn't want me going out.

Blah...I'm feeling so miserable about this..b/c he's so mad at me. Anyone else with parents like mine? Especially all you asian peeps out there? I'm so sad...

 

[CanOWorms]

99% of the people here are just going to say that it's your parents house, therefore follow their rules. Happens everytime

 

[DerwenArtos12]

no

 

[dighn]

Originally posted by: CanOWorms
99% of the people here are just going to say that it's your parents house, therefore follow their rules. Happens everytime

yep so predictable

but now that you said it they might not do it anymore... we'll see

 

[nativesunshine]

Originally posted by: CanOWorms
99% of the people here are just going to say that it's your parents house, therefore follow their rules. Happens everytime

Hey..I KNOW it's their house..and i KNOW it's their rules...and i DO follow them (most of the time).

I'm just sad that my friends don't understand....

 

[iamme]

i grew up with Asian parents who were pretty conservative. once i grew up, i realized that they loved me and they just wanted to protect me. i also realized that they busted their asses working nearly 70 hours a week in a country foreign to them, just so that my sister and i could have better opportunities. trivial things like "going out" became childish in hindsight.

try to explain to your friends. if they are you friends, they'll take the time to understand. it's hard, but not the end of the world

 

[Lucky]

if you are gonna post something like this you really need to say what you did, otherwise its impossible to answer if they are being irrational or not.

 

[NutBucket]

Welcome to my world. Have a great gf now but her family are like Nazi's; only all the time, not just when she's in trouble. It *seems* like things are getting better tho

 

[Angrymarshmello]

Typical Asian parents. How old are you anyway? There's only up a certain level where it's tolerable. However, living under her house it is her rules. You could just tell your friends the truth - they should be understanding of your situation if they truely are your friends

 

[kermalou]

five years down the line, you don't remember that your mom didn't let you go out, all you remember is why and that is what is important

 

[iamme]

btw, if your guy friend is mad that you're not going there for dinner, even though he knows you're trying to get on good terms w/ your mom......tell him he's being an inconsiderate dumbass.

 

[xSauronx]

Originally posted by: Lucky
if you are gonna post something like this you really need to say what you did, otherwise its impossible to answer if they are being irrational or not.

exactly

some parents wouldnt let you leave the house if you had detention after school (have a friend with a mom like this)
some parents wouldnt give a sh!t over the same thing

did you kill someone and they just not tell the cops? thats easily grounds for making you stay at home all the time
christ, if they didnt discipline you youd never learn....though, by the sound of it you learning is going to take a while anyway

 

[isekii]

Originally posted by: iamme
btw, if your guy friend is mad that you're not going there for dinner, even though he knows you're trying to get on good terms w/ your mom......tell him he's being an inconsiderate dumbass.

lol

 

[Ciber]

Originally posted by: nativesunshine
pssst....(K..this is gonna be a somewhat long rant

Am I the only one with parents like these??

More specifically, with a MOM like this??

I got into trouble (semi-big, dont' want to get into the details)...a couple weeks ago. Ever since then, she hasn't allowed me to do much..(like going out and stuff). Not to say that she hasn't let me AT all..but it takes a lot of convincing and sucking up for her to finally let me. Usually I bring my brother or sister into it and let them convince her for me.

My friends don't seem to understand that she's this way and I don't really want to like..make excuses for my mom. But it's getting quite ridiculous.

I was invited over my friend's house tonight for dinner....but I can't even work up the courage to ask my mom to let me go because not only will she say no..she'll start yelling at me about how i only want to go out. But hello..? it's summertime. when else would I be able to go out?

But anyway, my friend's all mad at me now. Claims he's not..but he is...won't even talk to me on the phone. Says he's annoyed and bothered...but THIS IS HOW MY MOTHER IS. He knows this...and yet he doesn't seem to understand. I know I messed up with her..and in order to get back her trust..I have to be the best damn little girl a parent could ask for. He doesn't understand that I have to do major sucking up to get her to trust me again.

Like i said, she doesn't forbid me from going out AT ALL...every once in a while she lets me...so it's not totally unfair that sometimes she just doesn't want me going out.

Blah...I'm feeling so miserable about this..b/c he's so mad at me. Anyone else with parents like mine? Especially all you asian peeps out there? I'm so sad...

Just described like 90% of the asian parents i know.

My fiancee's parents were like this, they loosened up once she worked up the courage to fight back and tell them she wasn't a little girl anymore and that they were not going to control every aspect of her life. They have now pretty much accepted that she has grown up and dont bother her at all for the most part.


Just tell them you're 20 years old and in college and it's rediculous to be treated like a child. If you say it enough she will eventually get the idea.

Btw the mother has always been the problem for the most part.

 

[sohdahere]

Originally posted by: Lucky
if you are gonna post something like this you really need to say what you did, otherwise its impossible to answer if they are being irrational or not.

99% of the people here are just going to say that it's your parents house, therefore follow their rules. Happens everytime

 

[Ciber]

Originally posted by: NutBucket
Welcome to my world. Have a great gf now but her family are like Nazi's; only all the time, not just when she's in trouble. It *seems* like things are getting better tho

Hang in there, they will loosen up.

 

[TwinkleToes77]

Without knowing what you did to be grounded its really hard to say if shes over-reacting.

What did you do?

 

[iamme]

hmm.....i didn't realize you were 20 and in college. i thought you were in HS. if you're that old and your mom is still not letting you "go out", you must have done something really bad or your mom is a little too overbearing.

so whatcha do?

 

[Mill]

Ok wait I see this has been answered. If you are 20 and in college move out. If your parents are that ridiculous I wouldn't live there.

 

[Ciber]

Originally posted by: CanOWorms
99% of the people here are just going to say that it's your parents house, therefore follow their rules. Happens everytime

Sometimes it's just silly.

My mother had rules, but if there was one that was being a real pain in the ass i would always let her know and we would work something out. Just because it's your parents house does not mean they should treat you like a mindless, lifeless pet that they can do whatever they want with, specially when they are 18+ and in college....

 

[notfred]

Ah, so close to not being another "My Asian parents suck" rant, but you managed to squeeze it in there right at the end.

 

[NutBucket]

Originally posted by: Ciber

Originally posted by: NutBucket
Welcome to my world. Have a great gf now but her family are like Nazi's; only all the time, not just when she's in trouble. It *seems* like things are getting better tho

Hang in there, they will loosen up.

I'm workin' on it. I mean, she's 20 and I'm the first guy she's ever dated....not by choice. Like I said, things seem to be getting better

 

[Ciber]

Originally posted by: NutBucket

Originally posted by: Ciber

Originally posted by: NutBucket
Welcome to my world. Have a great gf now but her family are like Nazi's; only all the time, not just when she's in trouble. It *seems* like things are getting better tho

Hang in there, they will loosen up.

I'm workin' on it. I mean, she's 20 and I'm the first guy she's ever dated....not by choice. Like I said, things seem to be getting better

I went through the same thing with my fiancee, it's very frustrating when your gf is that old and her parents are interfering with your lives, i know it drove me insane..... Just takes time for them to realize there "little girl" is growing up.

 

[EvanGeliSt]

Originally posted by: NutBucket

Originally posted by: Ciber

Originally posted by: NutBucket Welcome to my world. Have a great gf now but her family are like Nazi's; only all the time, not just when she's in trouble. It *seems* like things are getting better tho

Hang in there, they will loosen up.

I'm workin' on it. I mean, she's 20 and I'm the first guy she's ever dated....not by choice. Like I said, things seem to be getting better

Lol

Anyway, assuming that you hadn't got into too much trouble there - then your mum's probably just protective or wants you to stay out of trouble. Maybe the wrong way, but it's outta concern - I'm sure you know that.

Asian here too and my mum's cool about tlal these stuff. For the most part - earn her trust - show her than you're independent (pls dun take this the wrong way) - that's all you need.

 

[NutBucket]

Originally posted by: EvanGeliSt

Originally posted by: NutBucket

Originally posted by: Ciber

Originally posted by: NutBucket Welcome to my world. Have a great gf now but her family are like Nazi's; only all the time, not just when she's in trouble. It *seems* like things are getting better tho

Hang in there, they will loosen up.

I'm workin' on it. I mean, she's 20 and I'm the first guy she's ever dated....not by choice. Like I said, things seem to be getting better

Lol

Anyway, assuming that you hadn't got into too much trouble there - then your mum's probably just protective or wants you to stay out of trouble. Maybe the wrong way, but it's outta concern - I'm sure you know that.

Asian here too and my mum's cool about tlal these stuff. For the most part - earn her trust - show her than you're independent (pls dun take this the wrong way) - that's all you need.

A bit mixed up dude. My parents are cool. At this point they know I can make my own decisions so I'm pretty free to do as I like. Its her parents/family