A sticky kindergardener / older kid situation...

[blakeatwork]

Ehh.. yer obviously concerned about the cards themselves, otherwise it wouldn;'t be an issue... your son's a little gullible (being 6 and all tends to do that...) Just explain to him that if he wants to trade his cards, to ask you first if it's a good idea... teach him some monetary values of items and such... give him a head start so he can do the same when he's in grade , as opposed to waiting until grade 3 like the other dumbasses...

 

[bozack]

I had something happen like this to me when I was a child, I used to collect matchbox cars and had a pretty decent set of them.

Well there was aneighborhood kid who came over my house alot who was sort of a friend but not really, he was older and convinced me to trade my nice shiny new matchbox car (which was sweet by the way) for his old and beat up looking one, at the time I thought it was the best trade ever because I was young and didn't know any better.

After he left for the day I went and showed my father what had transpired, my father being the gentle and caring guy he was called me an effing moron, and that I got shafted and I was the dumbest kid ever and if I ever did that again he would beat my a$$ (remember I was about 5 or 6 years old, I am now 26 and I still remember this incident, tells you just how powerful verbal abuse can be)...

well needless to say I never traded anything agian unless I was sure it was a fair trade and for the longest time I never trusted anyone again amongst my friends...figures though when I did start trusting people I got over $100 worth of CDs stolen from me and also a $200 radio controlled car...go figure.

I would say you should tell him in a kind and gentle manner (not like my father) that he might want to not trade with the kids, that what you give him is special and you would like him to keep it...

good luck

 

[hevnsnt]

I am the one who traded with your boy, and I sold your puh-chi-monkey card on ebay for $1600 and bought a jet ski.

 

[Isla]

My solution would be simple:

Keep him off the bus and have him focus on making friends his own age. Explain to him that sometimes people act like they are your friends but they aren't really. This is my opinion as a teacher AND a parent.

Best Wishes

 

[CPA]

Originally posted by: Isla
My solution would be simple:

Keep him off the bus and have him focus on making friends his own age. Explain to him that sometimes people act like they are your friends but they aren't really. This is my opinion as a teacher AND a parent.

Best Wishes

Why remove him from the problem? He needs to learn to adjust to the problem and deal with it. You start pulling him away from every situation where he gets taken advantage of, loses, or doesn't come out ahead, then he will think that's the way the world works. It doesn't, he needs to learn from his mistakes and how to deal with them the next time it happens. Pulling him away doesn't teach him anything. What is he going to do the next time this problem presents itself?

 

[Lithium381]

Originally posted by: Isla
My solution would be simple:

Keep him off the bus and have him focus on making friends his own age. Explain to him that sometimes people act like they are your friends but they aren't really. This is my opinion as a teacher AND a parent.

Best Wishes

Yeah, ISLA knows the ropes.....
i would suggest, however, allow him to keep trading, if it brings him joy, things won't be quite this simple for him in a few years, so let him enjoy it while he can/, i colle/cted /marvel car/ds/ fo/r the longest time/, /pogs, and then magic cards.......all the fads that hit me, i had some good trades, and /some b/ad ones.../...i /learned /from it. try and teach him value, it'll sink in eventually, but don't just dump it all on him

ignore all the /'s

 

[Noirish]

Someone did have a good suggestion - let him ask you first before any trades.
You achieve two things by doing this:
(1) teach him about values (although these cards will become worthless within a year I figure)
(2) they won't take him as a, I don't want to say this but, fool, real friends won't treat him like that.

Whatever happened, you should probably let it go.
Maybe put some of the better cards in sleeves and tell him not to trade those unless he consults you first.
Anyway, you don't want to intervene too much.

 

[Isla]

Originally posted by: CPA

Originally posted by: Isla
My solution would be simple:

Keep him off the bus and have him focus on making friends his own age. Explain to him that sometimes people act like they are your friends but they aren't really. This is my opinion as a teacher AND a parent.

Best Wishes

Why remove him from the problem? He needs to learn to adjust to the problem and deal with it. You start pulling him away from every situation where he gets taken advantage of, loses, or doesn't come out ahead, then he will think that's the way the world works. It doesn't, he needs to learn from his mistakes and how to deal with them the next time it happens. Pulling him away doesn't teach him anything. What is he going to do the next time this problem presents itself?

There is plenty of time for him to learn about life.

Developmentally, a 6 year old is worlds apart from a 5th grader. Read up on the developmental stages of children and you won't be inclined to mix the ages up too much.

Why put a guppy in with a shark?

Granted, I don't advocate young children riding the bus in the first place. Personally, I think they need to learn about these things first, in a safer environment, BEFORE they get put on a bus with 50 screaming kids and a bus driver who may or may not give a shit.

Where I live, we had a bus driver leave a confused kid off 2 miles from his bus stop and the kid got killed trying to find his way home.

So, like I said, I wouldn't have my young child on the bus to begin with. A kindergartener is just a little too green and vulnerable to be put in such a chaotic situation where no one is looking out for him/her. It's my opinion, both professional and personal.

 

[mAdD INDIAN]

try to tell him that they are scamming him and he should recognize when they are doing so (is that possible for a 6-year old..I really don't know) and tell him to let his buddies know when they are scamming him so they won't try it again.

Also its bound to happen that the 5th graders will try to scam a KG student. I mean didn't you try to scam your younger brother when you were young?

 

[Isla]

Originally posted by: mAdD INDIAN
try to tell him that they are scamming him and he should recognize when they are doing so (is that possible for a 6-year old..I really don't know) and tell him to let his buddies know when they are scamming him so they won't try it again.

Also its bound to happen that the 5th graders will try to scam a KG student. I mean didn't you try to scam your younger brother when you were young?

This is the problem.

Developmentally, a kindergartener isn't really able to hold his own with a 5th grader. A kindergartener is at the mercy of a 5th grader.

"Lessons" like these mainly teach that people suck and are mean. The older kids are taking advantage of the younger because they can.

That's just the way it is. We learn and grow in stages, and there is a HUGE difference between 6 year old thinking and 11 year old thinking. The older ones will keep playing this kid, and when the card game is up, they will find another neat little trick to play on him.

 

[Akebona]

I say you sit down with your kid and go through the cards. Try to teach him value in the cards, which cards are valued more, and why its valued more. Then you split up the cards and do a mock trade. "Okay, since that card is worth 10 yuggies, and these two are worth 5 yuggies......" wait can he do math yet?? n/m.... just let him have fun. You're right, it is a tough situation. you can try and remove him from these bullies while he is young but you realize that he will have to deal with this sometime in the future again. Like isla said, his thinking is very immature right now, maybe its better that he learns this lesson that everyone wants him to learn, later in life.

 

[JeffreyLebowski]

wow, I'm the only one that thinks that maybe the kid shouldn't be taking cards and stuff(basically a distraction) to school?
School is for learning what is tought there, not learning a card game.

What i would suggest is not allow him to take them to school, and maybe working a deal with him that if his grades are good, go to a local comic/game store that sells these and see if he can go there and trade, maybe talk to the owner/manager of the place about getting a bunch of the kids to go up there on saturdays, this way they can trade and play the actual game.

I was in junior highschool when Magic came out and I remember even then the bully kids would steal stuff from the other kids, until they banned the game at school, then when everyone went to the comic store behind the school and traded and played, this didn't happen cause the people that ran the place(college guys) would over see the younger kids and make sure they didn't get screwed over.

 

[everman]

If I had a kid in that situation, I'd make sure he's not around other kinds like that if I could. You know they aren't friends and are merely taking advantage of him. He should be making real friends.

 

[ajf3]

Wow - I'm overwhelmed at the responses!

Anyway, I think we're going to have him hold his really good cards back at home to avoid trading the good ones away & try to educate him a bit more on how to trade well... also suggested to him that he not accept the unknown card he's supposed to get tomorrow unless it's a really good one.

Thanks!