A SQL query walks into a bar

[Red Squirrel]

Goes to two tables and asks "can I join you?"

 

[Ns1]

This is either a -1/10 or 9/10. I can't decide.

 

[s0me0nesmind1]

I always fucking hated joins. I'm guessing it was just me - but if I ever wanted to see data a certain way I always figured it was easier to give an UPDATE statement instead of trying to make a shitload of JOINS

Of course, I'm also not a DBA of maintaining shitloads of crucial data. I've always been along the lines of data manipulation looking for a certain type of output.

 

[s0me0nesmind1]

Goes to two tables and asks "can I join you?"

He then selects one to take home and asks, may I insert into you?

 

[GagHalfrunt]

He then selects one to take home and asks, may I insert into you?

Error 1045:
Message: Access denied for user

 

[Red Squirrel]

I always fucking hated joins. I'm guessing it was just me - but if I ever wanted to see data a certain way I always figured it was easier to give an UPDATE statement instead of trying to make a shitload of JOINS

Of course, I'm also not a DBA of maintaining shitloads of crucial data. I've always been along the lines of data manipulation looking for a certain type of output.

I always forget the syntax and have to look it up or look at previous code. Always forget if I should do left or right or inner etc... Then I go down the rabbit hole reading up so I can understand the differences. A month later I forget then next time I have to do it again I start over.

 

[John Connor]

Error 1045:
Message: Access denied for user

Can't tell you how many times I seen that crap in Xampp.

 

[Red Squirrel]

Error 1045:
Message: Access denied for user

Need to go in as root, then you're all good!

 

[John Connor]

Three tools any webmaster must have: Winmerge, Notepad ++ and Fileseek. I acctully used Notepad ++ to change the database engine in a SQL database because I couldn't for the life of me understand all the grabass code syntax to change it in phpmyadmin. Was a simple replace all. Winmerge can see differences in files and Fileseek will look for words inside files.

 

[mxnerd]

from the net

SELECT *
FROM [Users]
WHERE [Clue] > 0

No records found.

 

[mxnerd]

also from the net

Don't ask a DBA to help you move furniture.

They've been known to DROP TABLES.

 

[John Connor]

Made this up.

How many database's does it take to screw in a light bulb? UTF8.

 

[BrokenVisage]

He then selects one to take home and asks, may I insert into you?

Give her the ol' inner join, no toys or cartesian products.

 

[PJFrylar]

 

[purbeast0]

This is either a -1/10 or 9/10. I can't decide.

The former.

Would have been better if he said "Can I INSERT into you?".

But even that is dumb.

 

[zinfamous]

Was going to post about nerds earlier, decided against it, PJFrylar took up the cause.

 

[John Connor]

LOL!