A few thoughts from a day spent at the mall...

rudeguy

Lifer
Dec 27, 2001
47,371
14
61
Against my will, I was forced to spend the better part of today shopping. The death blow was when I found out the mall was part of the deal. I did manage to survive the carnage, and I am a little more educated because of it.

I present to you these facts:
1. As the temperature drops, so do people's IQ's
2. The busier a store is, the more stupid people act
3. If rules 1&2 are combined, the resulting effect is an IQ of lawn furniture or less
4. Fat people like to walk in 3's, and spread out across the busiest aisle of the store
5. I want retractable arms. My current arms get bored after a few hours of dangling there with nothing to do
6. In a busy retail environment, soccer moms resort back to their basic instinct and will chew your arm off for the last size 7 little girl's santa dress
7. Old Country Buffet is not a good place for your 19 member family to celebrate and do their gift exchange
8. Battering rams should be legal during Christmas time but only in mall parking lots
 

Zim Hosein

Super Moderator | Elite Member
Super Moderator
Nov 27, 1999
64,818
375
126
5. I want retractable arms. My current arms get bored after a few hours of dangling there with nothing to do

May I make a suggestion rudeguy? :p
 

Gothgar

Lifer
Sep 1, 2004
13,463
1
0
as for number 1....

I think people are just stupid all year, you are probably just around them more when you are at the mall
 

rudeguy

Lifer
Dec 27, 2001
47,371
14
61
Originally posted by: Zim Hosein
5. I want retractable arms. My current arms get bored after a few hours of dangling there with nothing to do

May I make a suggestion rudeguy? :p

I put a lot of thought into this. Wouldn't it be cool to just pull them up into your body? Just have hands at the shoulder?

Retractable legs would be cool too. No more looking for a place to sit! Just pull your legs up and have feet right at butt level.
 

Zim Hosein

Super Moderator | Elite Member
Super Moderator
Nov 27, 1999
64,818
375
126
Originally posted by: Gothgar
as for number 1....

I think people are just stupid all year, you are probably just around them more when you are at the mall

Hmmm... I wonder how that theory holds up during the times when school is out here on ATOT? :p
 

rudeguy

Lifer
Dec 27, 2001
47,371
14
61
Originally posted by: Zim Hosein
Originally posted by: Gothgar
as for number 1....

I think people are just stupid all year, you are probably just around them more when you are at the mall

Hmmm... I wonder how that theory holds up during the times when school is out here on ATOT? :p

It holds up quite nicely to my belief that one could become a millionaire if they invent a way to stab people in the face over the internet.
 

IronWing

No Lifer
Jul 20, 2001
69,015
26,894
136
7. seems perfectly reasonable as they have acres of space. Chick-fil-a would be a bad place though.
 

sandorski

No Lifer
Oct 10, 1999
70,100
5,640
126
It's not the Cold, it's the Season. Half the people(including myself) are in our own little worlds trying to figure out what to get a bunch of people of varying ages.
 

dlx22

Golden Member
Apr 19, 2006
1,285
0
0
Originally posted by: rudeguy
4. Fat people like to walk in 3's, and spread out across the busiest aisle of the store

hey at least they are walking! seriously like thats one of the things that disgusted me the most when I moved to Texas, tons of fat chicks...seems like the local stores have fleets of motarized cars just waiting to carry their fat asses around....I can't remember the last time I actually saw a disabled person using one...
/rant
 

Gothgar

Lifer
Sep 1, 2004
13,463
1
0
Originally posted by: rudeguy
Originally posted by: Zim Hosein
Originally posted by: Gothgar
as for number 1....

I think people are just stupid all year, you are probably just around them more when you are at the mall

Hmmm... I wonder how that theory holds up during the times when school is out here on ATOT? :p

It holds up quite nicely to my belief that one could become a millionaire if they invent a way to stab people in the face over the internet.

I don't know... the stabbings would be so vast that I think before you could collect your money everyone would be dead
 

sandorski

No Lifer
Oct 10, 1999
70,100
5,640
126
Originally posted by: Gothgar
Originally posted by: rudeguy
Originally posted by: Zim Hosein
Originally posted by: Gothgar
as for number 1....

I think people are just stupid all year, you are probably just around them more when you are at the mall

Hmmm... I wonder how that theory holds up during the times when school is out here on ATOT? :p

It holds up quite nicely to my belief that one could become a millionaire if they invent a way to stab people in the face over the internet.

I don't know... the stabbings would be so vast that I think before you could collect your money everyone would be dead

hehe, yup. A Hacker would take of that with a Worm or other such thing.
 

WHAMPOM

Diamond Member
Feb 28, 2006
7,628
183
106
Originally posted by: Gothgar
Originally posted by: rudeguy
Originally posted by: Zim Hosein
Originally posted by: Gothgar
as for number 1....

I think people are just stupid all year, you are probably just around them more when you are at the mall

Hmmm... I wonder how that theory holds up during the times when school is out here on ATOT? :p

It holds up quite nicely to my belief that one could become a millionaire if they invent a way to stab people in the face over the internet.

I don't know... the stabbings would be so vast that I think before you could collect your money everyone would be dead

prepay