20 ways computer enthusiasts and gamers call someone stupid:

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ThreeLeggedGnome

Senior member
Jun 18, 2002
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1- He?s not the fastest PC on the network.
2- He?s as bright as Quake on a TNT 2.
3- He?s as quick as Windows XP on 32 meg of SDRAM.
4- He?s as sharp as Doom2 textures viewed up-close.
5- He processes information at the speed of a cachless Celeron.
6- He might need a RAM upgrade but it?s his CPU that lags behind.
7- His brain circuitry has more logic errors than Windows 95 OS.
8- He?s extremely efficient as long as his only tasks are starting up and shutting down.
9- His IQ score is as high as the Morrowind outdoor frame rate.
10- His logic is as crash-proof as Elderscroll.
11- His web site is there but the content is not.
12- He?s the AOL at his work place.
13- His brain was built by Microsoft.
14- He has the intelligence of a sidekick in Daikatana.
15- He?s the dungeon siege mule in his department.
16- His stupidity is the size of the internet.
17- He fell down the binary tree and hit every zero on the way.
18- He has a few missing DLL files in his library.
19- He?s as stable as a Packard Bell.
20- His hardware are there but the OS is not.
 
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VTBigBear

Platinum Member
Jun 13, 2000
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0
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17- He fell down the binary tree and hit every zero on the way


not accurate.. but funny neverless

:D
 
vi edit

vi edit

Elite Member
Super Moderator
Oct 28, 1999
62,484
8,345
126
21. He's got a static IQ.
22. He's got a capped brain bandwith.
 
vi edit

vi edit

Elite Member
Super Moderator
Oct 28, 1999
62,484
8,345
126
Originally posted by: Beau6183
23 - He posted but his hard drives weren't recognized
Click to expand...

:D

His CDROM spun up, but no media was detected.

 
vi edit

vi edit

Elite Member
Super Moderator
Oct 28, 1999
62,484
8,345
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His brain wasn't running at an optimal refresh rate.
 
datalink7

datalink7

Lifer
Jan 23, 2001
16,765
6
81
There are some good ones in here:

Weird Al- All about the pentiums:

It's all about the Pentiums, baby
Uhh, uh-huh, yeah Uhh, uh-huh, yeah
It's all about the Pentiums, baby
It's all about the Pentiums, baby
It's all about the Pentiums!
It's all about the Pentiums!
(Yeah!!)

What y'all wanna do?
Wanna be hackers? Code crackers? Slackers
Wastin' time with all the chatroom yakkers?
9 to 5, chillin' at Hewlett Packard?
Workin' at a desk with a dumb little placard?
Yeah, payin' the bills with my mad programming skills
Defraggin' my hard drive for thrills
I got me a hundred gigabytes of RAM
I never feed trolls and I don't read spam
Installed a T1 line in my house
Always at my PC, double-clickin' on my mizouse
Upgrade my system at least twice a day
I'm strictly plug-and-play, I ain't afraid of Y2K
I'm down with Bill Gates, I call him Money for short
I phone him up at home and I make him do my tech support
It's all about the Pentiums, what?
You gotta be the dumbest newbie I've ever seen
You've got white-out all over your screen
You think your Commodore 64 is really neato
What kinda chip you got in there, a Dorito?
You're using a 286? Don't make me laugh
Your Windows boots up in what, a day and a half?
You could back up your whole hard drive on a floppy diskette
You're the biggest joke on the internet
Your database is a disaster
You're waxin' your modem tryin' to make it go faster
Hey fella, I bet you're still livin' in your parents' cellar
Downloadin' pictures of Sarah Michelle Gellar
And postin "Me too!" like some brain-dead AOL-er
I should do the world a favor and cap you like Old Yeller
You're just about as useless as jpegs to Helen Keller

It's all about the Pentiums!
It's all about the Pentiums!
It's all about the Pentiums!
It's all about the Pentiums!

Now, what y'all wanna do?
Wanna be hackers? Code crackers? Slackers
Wastin' time with all the chatroom yakkers?
9 to 5, chillin at Hewlett Packard?

Uh, uh, loggin' in now
Wanna run wit my crew, hah?
Rule cyberspace and crunch numbers like I do?
They call me the king of the spreadsheets
Got em all printed out on my bedsheets
My new computer's got the clocks, it rocks
But it was obsolete before I opened the box
You say you've had your desktop for over a week?
Throw that junk away, man, it's an antique!
Your laptop is a month old? Well, that's great
If you could use a nice, heavy paperweight
My digital media is write-protected
Every file inspected, no viruses detected
I beta tested every operating system
Gave props to some, and others? I dissed 'em
While your computer's crashin', mine's multitaskin'
It does all my work without me even askin'
Got a flat-screen monitor, 40" wide
I believe that yours says "Etch-A-Sketch" on the side
In a 32-bit world, you're a 2-bit user
You've got your own newsgroup, alt.total-loser
Your mother board melts when you try to send a fax
Where'd you get your CPU, in a box of Cracker Jacks?
Play me online? Well, you know that I'll beat you
If I ever meet you I'll control-alt-delete you
What?

It's all about the Pentiums!
It's all about the Pentiums!
It's all about the Pentiums!
It's all about the Pentiums!
What y'all wanna do?
Wanna be hackers? Code crackers? Slackers
Wastin' time with all the chatroom yakkers?
9 to 5, chillin' at Hewlett Packard?
What??
 
D

DNMonty

Member
Mar 22, 2002
28
0
0
Originally posted by: yakko
Originally posted by: DNMonty
How about he has a PEBCAK error?
(Problem Exists Between Chair And Keyboard)
Click to expand...

That should be PEBKAC.
Click to expand...

Actually you are incorrect.
Since the keyboard is an input device, not an output device, data flows from Chair to operator to keyboard. Unless the keyboard is flowing data back, the path doesn't exist for an error.

:D
 
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