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10' Python slithers up toilet and....

D

Darwin333

Lifer
Chomps down on the guys penis. Took the poor bastard 30 minutes to get it off!!!! :'(


A Thai man is recovering from a bloody encounter with a 10-foot python that slithered through the plumbing of his home and latched its jaws onto his penis as he was using a squat toilet.

The 38-year-old told Thai TV Channel 7 that he struggled to remove the snake for 30 minutes Wednesday before he managed to free himself with help from his wife and a neighbor. After his wife tied a rope around the snake, Attaporn pried open its jaws before passing out.
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Holy hell!!!

http://nypost.com/2016/05/26/python-slithers-up-toilet-latches-onto-mans-penis/
 
09343edf603e1f3e8dab9c0213a49cb80020f9210b76da49b2e8a2a44579aad0.jpg
 
LOLOLOL... ah gawd. And I thought sitting on the john was a good place to think... maybe not so much.
OutHouse said:
see, my fear of snakes isnt so irrational now is it.
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Probably not if you're in an Outhouse. Now, I had a trenchless sewer job done on my property not too long ago, I'm probably safe.
 
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EvilYoda said:
Great. I've had this same exact fear for a long time and now it's substantiated.

Fuck.
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If you have one of those oblong shitters you could always put some mesh in the front to protect the twig and berries. Might get a bit of splash back but it sure as hell beats swinging a 10' long python around while it has a death bite on your junk while you hope someone can grab a rope to tie around it and help you pull it off before it takes it all the way off and swallows it whole.


And what the mother fuck is the deal with setting the damn monster free?!? If I was that poor bastard I'd want to make a pair of boots out of that slithering cock biting SOB.
 
In. The. Dick.

My local 24/7 news reported this... First report said penis, I think all the ones afterward weren't as specific.

P.S. Wonder if he'll get charged with bestiality...
 
30min is a whole lot of time to ponder such a situation. At some point he had to have a funny thought.
 
That's a weird toilet.

Whenever I use an outhouse I can't help but wonder if there is a snake that decides to come in for a bite. 😱 Now that this story happened I will think about that even more next time I use one.
 
This snake on trouser snake violence has to end.

Darwin333 said:
And what the mother fuck is the deal with setting the damn monster free?!? If I was that poor bastard I'd want to make a pair of boots out of that slithering cock biting SOB.
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It's like with man-eating tigers. Once they have a taste for human flesh, you have to put them down or they will do it again and again.

I'm not sure snakes can acquire a taste for dick, but I wouldn't want to take any chances.
 
Charmonium said:
I'm not sure snakes can acquire a taste for dick, but I wouldn't want to take any chances.
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The fucker wouldn't let go for a full 30 minutes and finally had to be pried off while someone else pulled his ass with a rope. I'd say he has more than just a "taste" for dick at this point. Slithery bastard sure as hell didn't want to be denied his tasty meal.

I would like to think that I would have been able to remain conscience long enough to cut the fuckers head off but considering 30 minutes of wrestling with a 10' long snake who was gnawing on my junk and the sheer amount of blood that came/was coming from my junk I probably would have passed out too.

Obligatory Samuel L pic
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Rakehellion said:
Takes my girlfriend only 5 minutes to get me off but then again, she doesn't use her teeth.
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You know, I hadn't considered that. Maybe the guy enjoyed it at first and the snake really liked the taste of his, umm, "enjoyment" and wanted more. Unfortunately the snake didn't know about the "cool down" phase and just kept trying to get more during the uber sensitive stage. Then the snake got pissed off when he wasn't getting any more of the creamy filling and started biting down figuring that the rest of the creamy filling was in the middle.
 
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