Your neighbor is on a sexual offenders list, how would you deal with this situation?

[MrSquished]

It's a really touchy subject and without knowing details I'd rather just stay out of it. I would act like I don't even know but also not exactly try to make friends with him either. If I had kids I'd make sure they're never alone near/with him.

Imagine if in 50-60 years when you finally move into your hut on the off the grid place, a sex offender builds a palatial off the grid bunker, right next to you! Howdy neighbor, can I borrow some food!

 

[Oyeve]

I live in a NYC co-op. every other person is a sex offender.

 

[Stiff Clamp]

gift sus neighbor this pillow . . . so any of his guests would get a clue

 

[nakedfrog]

I don't get it.

 

[VirtualLarry]

Is that a character from "Goodnight, Moon" or something?

 

[MtnMan]

I'd be nervous and watchful, what else can you do? Not worried for me, but my neighbors. Lots of kids in the area and there's a park across the street, that alone would make me suspicious.

Again, this is a knee-jerk reaction. I'm in no way defending actual sex offenders, but there are people on the list that should have never been there. Taking a piss when you absolutely could not hold it, any sexual activity with your girlfriend if you were over 18, and she wasn't 18 yet.

The truth is, many of us could have been on the list for perfectly normal behavior in our youth, we just didn't get caught, or the cops just told us to "move along".

 

[Stiff Clamp]

Is that a character from "Goodnight, Moon" or something?

forget where it came from, been a couple years . . . maybe SMOSH? (the youtubers)
Anyway the character in the skits was Molester Moon. Kind of menacing.

 

[Iron Woode]

the 18-year-old boy that has sex with his almost 18-year-old girlfriend.

That would be perfectly legal in Canada.

 

[A///]

Nextdoor is just a playground for all the Karens in the hood.

Male karens exist, too. Karens are the nosy neighbor of yester year.

 

[Muse]

Again, this is a knee-jerk reaction. I'm in no way defending actual sex offenders, but there are people on the list that should have never been there. Taking a piss when you absolutely could not hold it, any sexual activity with your girlfriend if you were over 18, and she wasn't 18 yet.

The truth is, many of us could have been on the list for perfectly normal behavior in our youth, we just didn't get caught, or the cops just told us to "move along".

TBH I have never encountered a designated sexual offender. It's just something I've heard about in the news, and I'm sure they weren't just guys who had sex with a 17 YO girl. In any case, I wouldn't be doing anything, i.e. surveillance. No kids in my house...

 

[Perknose]

Anyway the character in the skits was Molester Moon.

Korean rapper?

 

[Captante]

You should be "nervous and watchful" of EVERYONE you don't know to a degree.


OTOH "registered sex offenders" are so low in terms of REAL danger of re-offending that they should only be "on the radar" of people hiring for schools or daycare centers.

In a 10+ year study of sex offender recidivism in the State of Connecticut (conducted by the State Police) that followed over 10,000 offenders, the ACTUAL % of people who re-offended was around 2-3%.

Note the VAST majority of offenders nationwide who end up back in prison are there for technical errors or probation violations completely unrelated to their original offense, mostly having to do with registration problems.

So in short, spending more than 30 seconds "studying up" on where the evil registered sex offenders live near you is stupid and a complete waste of your time.

 

[JEDI]

You just get the news your longtime friendly neighbor is now a registered sex offender. How will you deal with him/her/they?

priest?
former atot member? (whats his name again?)

 

[Torn Mind]

Again, this is a knee-jerk reaction. I'm in no way defending actual sex offenders, but there are people on the list that should have never been there. Taking a piss when you absolutely could not hold it, any sexual activity with your girlfriend if you were over 18, and she wasn't 18 yet.

The truth is, many of us could have been on the list for perfectly normal behavior in our youth, we just didn't get caught, or the cops just told us to "move along".

Some locales give an exception for those close in age. So for those areas, any sex offender does deserve suspicion and a trip to the courthouse to get the specifics. Because "the list" actually keeps things to a bare minimum. Or at least that's the case in Maryland.

The non ticky-tack violations of sex abuse laws often boils down to trust and manipulation, then exploiting a situation. The sex offender may learn to avoid the system, but there is no incentive for them to reform their social conduct since it is already in an advantaged state when dealing with others.

 

[Torn Mind]

You should be "nervous and watchful" of EVERYONE you don't know to a degree.


OTOH "registered sex offenders" are so low in terms of REAL danger of re-offending that they should only be "on the radar" of people hiring for schools or daycare centers.

In a 10+ year study of sex offender recidivism in the State of Connecticut (conducted by the State Police) that followed over 10,000 offenders, the ACTUAL % of people who re-offended was around 2-3%.

Note the VAST majority of offenders nationwide who end up back in prison are there for technical errors or probation violations completely unrelated to their original offense, mostly having to do with registration problems.

So in short, spending more than 30 seconds "studying up" on where the evil registered sex offenders live near you is stupid and a complete waste of your time.

One out of every 33 re-offending is actually not "rare". It's deceptively "common" given the trauma a sexual offense can cause to a person.

 

[Captante]

One out of every 33 re-offending is actually not "rare". It's deceptively "common" given the trauma a sexual offense can cause to a person.

You really are an idiot.

 

[Zorba]

The only way to justly treat a sex offender is to severe ties. They are not worthy of mercy or a second chance.

Because if he could manipulate someone into accessing their kids, he/she is also more than capable of manipulating you. Plus, their abilities to manipulate are used elsewhere, not just for sex offending.

I and my mother dealt with two sex offenders as tenants. Needless to say, a true appreciation of their conduct can only be grasped that the sex offending is but merely a part of an overall ability to trigger and manipulate "social cues/norms".

They can cause damages in other ways, on smaller scale. If you have no record or inspection, they'll break something and claim it's an issue.

I used to live by someone on the list. Got busted when he was a HS senior for banging his Sophomore girlfriend. I guess you think he should be punished for life?

How about the guy pissing behind a tree, throwaway the key there too?

 

[Zorba]

I'd be nervous and watchful, what else can you do? Not worried for me, but my neighbors. Lots of kids in the area and there's a park across the street, that alone would make me suspicious.

The vast majority of molestation does not occur from a guy kidnapping a random kid from a playground. Even with adults, the vast majority of rapists are someone known to the victim.

People are so worried about the stranger they never think of the Sunday school teacher or the cousin or the brother. I actually know multiple women who were raped by their brothers as teens, I (thankfully) don't know any that were kidnapped.

 

[Torn Mind]

You really are an idiot.

Your expression of emotion is received. It is also noted that the descriptor is without sufficient basis. You see, I have played simulations in which 1-3% are an occurrence- that being the tactical game Fire Emblem. Of the utmost heart-jerkers is the "low probability" critical hit.

The state you're talking about had the Chesire murders occur.

In addition, the offenders may not commit another sex crime, but they instead might commit a non-sex crime(unethical civil-only conduct or totally legal unethical conduct is obviously not recorded or studied. Nor is nonjudicial misconduct, i.e in workplace politics). So, the offender may not commit another sex crime again...but getting arrested again for any reason, much higher.

In addition, it was also noted that many cases end in plea bargain, and a sex offense charge gets dropped, and thus such an individual does not need to register into a registry

 

[Torn Mind]

I used to live by someone on the list. Got busted when he was a HS senior for banging his Sophomore girlfriend. I guess you think he should be punished for life?

How about the guy pissing behind a tree, throwaway the key there too?

My point was that in my state, they don't have those sorts classified as sex offenders. So if someone is looking at the Maryland registry....those situations won't be there.

In the case of John Matamoros, not taking a plea bargain is likely why the state decided to fuck him over. You make them work hard, they can then wring every inch they want because things are proven on the record. Much information is missing, but the likely scenario is he picked jury trial. In addition, we're only getting his side of the story; what is lacking is indeed the witnesses' version of events. Thus the possibility remains open that his story is misconstruing the facts to some extent. To be forced to register requires two convictions of Open and Gross Lewdness.
Examples of people avoiding that: https://www.massachusettscriminallawyerblog.com/category/open-and-gross-lewdness/

I will also mention that these criminal trials usually take a bit of time, so a witness's testimony could develop inconsistencies compared to the other witnesses. Given a conviction occurred, they jury may have determined the law as stated was violated.

Long-ago charge to cost man his home

DELTONA — After the birth of his first daughter in 1986, Juan Matamoros decided to party. What he says he did afterward was not uncommon, but it has haunted him and his family for more than 2…

www.orlandosentinel.com

For the teen sex matters, yes, there are some situations where the results and damage are far greater than the circumstances and facts would entail.

 

[Captante]

Recidivism rates for violent crimes like armed robbery for example are in the area of 70%!! (again vs 2-3% maximum) Compare that REALITY with all the bull$hit you see/hear in media about sex-offenders.

Sex-offender registries are ineffective at preventing crime and consist largely of "feel-good" laws which do FAR more harm than good costing taxpayers a LOT of money, trashing families and worst of all MOST of them treat people peeing in public about the same as serial rapists.

Maybe the WORST part of this though is the HARD FACT (I have a buddy who is a PO for SO's specifically... he's responsible for 26 people!) That along with the sheer number of "evil sex offenders" in Connecticut alone @ almost 6000 (the vast majority of whom will never re-offend!) there's no way the few that really do need to be monitored can even have it done properly.

If said laws were really about protecting children or preventing crime there would be "registries" for people who commit crimes where nearly THREE QUARTERS of offenders did the same thing again. But they're not.

Sex-offender registries are a stupid waste of time and money as constituted and will be harshly judged by history.

 

[Muse]

The vast majority of molestation does not occur from a guy kidnapping a random kid from a playground. Even with adults, the vast majority of rapists are someone known to the victim.

People are so worried about the stranger they never think of the Sunday school teacher or the cousin or the brother. I actually know multiple women who were raped by their brothers as teens, I (thankfully) don't know any that were kidnapped.

TBH I can't remember ever hearing about any sexual predator stuff going on with anybody I have personally known.

 

[Captante]

A "sexual predator" and a "sex-offender" are two different things. (to be fair although EVERY "predator" is also an "offender" the reverse is untrue)

The ACTUAL "predators" are a TINY minority and they DO need to be monitored all the time.... my buddy as I mentioned has 26 "clients" currently and out of that 26 in his opinion (he's been a PO for 16 17 years btw) for 22 of them it's a complete waste of his time. Think MAYBE he could do a more effective job supervising four offenders instead?)

Every sexual "offense" regardless of severity needs to be dealt with harshly however what the SOR has done in the US is create a subset of "pariah's".

Nearly ALL offenders WILL get released from prison at some point and most of what current law actually does virtually FORCES many of them to commit more crime because they literally can't live anywhere or get a decent/legit job. (also in "2011 dollars" in Connecticut it cost nearly $60k per year to imprison an offender.... 97-98% of whom go back in for TECHNICAL violations)

Counterproductive AT BEST when the purported "goal" is to make people safer.

 

[Captante]

My point was that in my state, they don't have those sorts classified as sex offenders. So if someone is looking at the Maryland registry....those situations won't be there.

"Your" state of Maryland is one of the "friendliest" and most protective of SO's rights in the US. Something I would bet good money you were completely unaware of. (maybe it's your dentists fault?)

 

[nakedfrog]

TBH I can't remember ever hearing about any sexual predator stuff going on with anybody I have personally known.

It's often covered up by existing power structures (local government, church, military) and wouldn't you know it, the victims are often made to feel shame for it and isn't information they readily share with just anyone.
"Johnny/Grampa/Uncle just had a moment of indiscretion, we don't need to ruin their whole life over it, besides, think what it would do to the family's reputation"