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You thought philosophy was tough?

B

Brainiac2000

Member
OK, i heard this one from somebody else, and it was really funny. Tell me what you think of this (it really did happen):

Theres this philosophy class at college, and the students were learning to reason and explain why things were and why we were not imagining things. Well, for the final essay, the professor asks places a chair in the middle of the room, and asks the students to reason that the chair does not exist. Tough concept? One student got up and turned his essay in after about a minute, while others spent 2 hours on it. He ended up getting the highest grade. His response? here it is:

"What chair?"
 
Moronic whimsical professors. And why did it take this kid an entire minute to write, "What chair?"
 
yeah and like this one:
The following is an actual question given on
University of IOWA chemistry mid term. The
answer was so "profound" that the professor
shared it with colleagues, which is why we
now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well.

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off
heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?
Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs
using Boyle's Law, (gas cools off when it expands
and heats up when it is compressed) or some
variant. One student, however, wrote the following:
First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is
changing in time. So we need to know the rate that
souls are moving into Hell and the rate they are leaving.
I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets
to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.
As for how many souls are entering Hell, lets look
at the different religions that exist in the world today.
Some of these religions state that if you are not a
member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since
there are more than one of these religions and since
people do not belong to more than one religion, we
can project that all souls go to Hell.

With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect
the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially.
Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell
because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature
and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has
to expand as souls are added. This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which
souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell
will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2. Of course, if Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the
increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure
will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to me by
Ms. Teresa Banyan during my Freshman year, "...that it
will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you." Taking
into account the fact that I still have not succeeded in
having sexual relations with her, then, #2 cannot be true,
and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and will not freeze.

The student received the only "A" given.

*kat. <-- still hates the forward
 
lol, i'm glad I didn't take philosophy in college.

I have too much of my dad in me... The man is nothing if not a practical, pragmatic, no-nonsense realist. A pain in my airy-fairy butt, but a grounding influence indeed...

&quot;What do you mean you need to find yourself? I can see you, you are right there!&quot;

😀
 
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