- May 18, 2001
- 7,856
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I'm updating a large software application today with year-end updates. The application has two parts: a client/server app, and a web app. This app is very important; among other things, it stores our payroll and human resources data. If this app doesn't work, people don't get paychecks.
It is for this very reason that I have gone to great, painful lengths to make sure this upgrade goes as smoothly as possible. I installed it on a test server first, making sure I ironed out any wrinkles I found. I notified all users company-wide in a very clear, pointed email to stay off the system during the upgrade, and to reinforce this I shut down the web app from IIS. The only vulnerable spot is the 15 or so users who have access to the client app, but they are the elite users I can count on to follow directions, right?
So today I began running the upgrade and for a while things ran real smoothly. Then, out of the blue, the upgrade crashes, giving me an error that said something about a table being locked.
The drops of sweat immediately broke out on my forehead right next to all the enlarged pulsating veins, and my lip began to quiver.
I quickly ran sp_who on the database, and found my worst fear: Mr. Chuckles had logged in through the client app.
I could barely contain my primal, skull crushing rage as I turned a deep crimson and looked up his phone extension. What follows is an approximation of the conversation:
Me (semi-yelling): "WTF?!??!?? Didn't you get the email??!!?!?!"
Mr. Chuckles (chuckling): "Huh? Oh, wait - yeah I got the email. I thought you meant everybody except for me."
Me (gasping for breath): "!!?!??!?"
Mr. Chuckles (still chuckling, ignoring the ominous silence coming from my end): "So do you want me to get out or what?"
Me (furiously trying to reach through the phone line to choke the shit out of this cretin): "Get out and stay out until I give you the 'all clear', dumbass!!!!!!"
<sound of me slamming down the phone>
And users wonder why we hate them so.
It is for this very reason that I have gone to great, painful lengths to make sure this upgrade goes as smoothly as possible. I installed it on a test server first, making sure I ironed out any wrinkles I found. I notified all users company-wide in a very clear, pointed email to stay off the system during the upgrade, and to reinforce this I shut down the web app from IIS. The only vulnerable spot is the 15 or so users who have access to the client app, but they are the elite users I can count on to follow directions, right?
So today I began running the upgrade and for a while things ran real smoothly. Then, out of the blue, the upgrade crashes, giving me an error that said something about a table being locked.
The drops of sweat immediately broke out on my forehead right next to all the enlarged pulsating veins, and my lip began to quiver.
I quickly ran sp_who on the database, and found my worst fear: Mr. Chuckles had logged in through the client app.
I could barely contain my primal, skull crushing rage as I turned a deep crimson and looked up his phone extension. What follows is an approximation of the conversation:
Me (semi-yelling): "WTF?!??!?? Didn't you get the email??!!?!?!"
Mr. Chuckles (chuckling): "Huh? Oh, wait - yeah I got the email. I thought you meant everybody except for me."
Me (gasping for breath): "!!?!??!?"
Mr. Chuckles (still chuckling, ignoring the ominous silence coming from my end): "So do you want me to get out or what?"
Me (furiously trying to reach through the phone line to choke the shit out of this cretin): "Get out and stay out until I give you the 'all clear', dumbass!!!!!!"
<sound of me slamming down the phone>
And users wonder why we hate them so.