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You Know You are a Computer Addict When .........

simondedalus

Member
Jul 13, 2007
154
0
0
  • You Know Your a Computer Addict When - Your stationery is more cluttered
    than Warren Beatty's address book. The letterhead lists a fax number, e-mail
    addresses for two on-line services, and your Internet address, which spreads
    across the breadth of the letterhead and continues to the back. In essence,
    you have conceded that the first page of any letter you write
    *is*letterhead.
    You Know Your a Computer Addict When - You have never sat through an entire
    movie without having at least one device on your body beep or buzz.
    You Know Your a Computer Addict When - You need to fill out a form that must
    be typewritten, but you can't because there isn't one typewriter in your
    house -- only computers with laser printers.
    You Know Your a Computer Addict When - You think of the gadgets in your
    office as "friends," but you forget to send your father a birthday card.
    You Know Your a Computer Addict When - You disdain people who use low baud
    rates.
    You Know Your a Computer Addict When - When you go into a computer store,
    you eavesdrop on a salesperson talking with customers -- and you butt in to
    correct him and spend the next twenty minutes answering the customers'
    questions, while the salesperson stands by silently, nodding his head.
    You Know Your a Computer Addict When - You use the phrase "digital
    compression" in a conversation without thinking how strange your mouth feels
    when you say it.
    You Know Your a Computer Addict When - You constantly find yourself in
    groups of people to whom you say the phrase "digital compression." Everyone
    understands what you mean, and you are not surprised or disappointed that
    you don't have to explain it.
    You Know Your a Computer Addict When - You know Bill Gates' e-mail address,
    but you have to look up your own social security number.
    You Know Your a Computer Addict When - You stop saying "phone number" and
    replace it with "voice number," since we all know the majority of phone
    lines in any house are plugged into contraptions that talk to other
    contraptions.
    You Know Your a Computer Addict When - You sign Christmas cards by putting
    :) next to your signature.
    You Know Your a Computer Addict When - Off the top of your head, you can
    think of nineteen keystroke symbols that are far more clever than :).
    You Know Your a Computer Addict When - You back up your data every day.
    You Know Your a Computer Addict When - Your wife asks you to pick up some
    minipads for her at the store and you return with a rest for your mouse.
    You Know Your a Computer Addict When - You think jokes about being unable to
    program a VCR are stupid.
    You Know Your a Computer Addict When - On vacation, you are reading a
    computer manual and turning the pages faster than everyone else who is
    reading John Grisham novels.
    You Know Your a Computer Addict When - The thought that a CD could refer to
    finance or music rarely enters your mind.
    You Know Your a Computer Addict When - You are able to argue persuasively
    the Ross Perot's phrase "electronic town hall" makes more sense than the
    term "information superhighway," but you don't because, after all, the man
    still uses hand-drawn pie charts.
    You Know Your a Computer Addict When - You go to computer trade shows and
    map out your path of the exhibit hall in advance. But you cannot give
    someone directions to your house without looking up the street names.
    You Know Your a Computer Addict When - You would rather get more dots per
    inch than miles per gallon.
    You Know Your a Computer Addict When - You become upset when a person calls
    you on the phone to sell you something, but you think it's okay for a
    computer to call and demand that you start pushing buttons on your telephone
    to receive more information about the product it is selling.
    You Know Your a Computer Addict When - You know without a doubt that disks
    come in five-and-a- quarter-and three-and-a-half-inch sizes.
    You Know Your a Computer Addict When - Al Gore strikes you as an
    "intriguing" fellow.
    You Know Your a Computer Addict When - You own a set of itty-bitty
    screw-drivers and you actually know where they are.
    You Know Your a Computer Addict When - While contemporaries swap stories
    about their recent hernia surgeries, you compare mouse-induced index-finger
    strain with a nine-year-old.
    You Know Your a Computer Addict When - You are so knowledgeable about
    technology that you feel secure enough to say "I don't know" when someone
    asks you a technology question instead of feeling compelled to make
    something up.
    You Know Your a Computer Addict When - You rotate your screen savers more
    frequently than your automobile tires.
    You Know Your a Computer Addict When - You have a functioning home copier
    machine, but every toaster you own turns bread into charcoal.
    You Know Your a Computer Addict When - You have ended friendships because of
    irreconcilably different opinions about which is better -- the track ball or
    the track *pad*.
    You Know Your a Computer Addict When - You understand all the jokes in this
    message. If so, my friend, technology has taken over your life. We suggest,
    for your own good, that you go lie under a tree and write a haiku. And don't
    use a laptop.
    You Know Your a Computer Addict When - You email this message to your
    friends over the net. You'd never get around to showing it to them in person
    or reading it to them on the phone.
 

Captante

Lifer
Oct 20, 2003
19,661
2,979
126
You Know Your a Computer Addict When:


When you take the time to type out a post like this one?
 

So

Lifer
Jul 2, 2001
25,914
3
81
Originally posted by: djheater
Holy crap. You make baby jesus cry.

You're
Made me cry too. I stopped reading after the first two. Of course, being not funny helped with that.
 

Jeff7

Lifer
Jan 4, 2001
41,599
17
81
You disdain people who use low baud rates.

You have ended friendships because of irreconcilably different opinions about which is better -- the track ball or the track *pad*.

Baud rates? Trackballs vs track pads?

Something tells me that this is about as old as the Internet.
 

DrPizza

Administrator Elite Member Goat Whisperer
Administrator
Mar 5, 2001
49,606
162
111
www.slatebrookfarm.com
You know you're a computer addict when you continue to repeat things that you found in your email, despite everyone else telling you they've seen it a thousand times already.
 

shortylickens

No Lifer
Jul 15, 2003
80,109
12,921
126
Originally posted by: DrPizza
You know you're a computer addict when you continue to repeat things that you found in your email, despite everyone else telling you they've seen it a thousand times already.
FOR THE WIN!!!

And either dump or change the first one.
Nobody even knows who Warren Beatty is anymore and nobody gave a shit about him back then either.
 

simondedalus

Member
Jul 13, 2007
154
0
0
Originally posted by: shortylickens
Originally posted by: DrPizza
You know you're a computer addict when you continue to repeat things that you found in your email, despite everyone else telling you they've seen it a thousand times already.
FOR THE WIN!!!

And either dump or change the first one.
Nobody even knows who Warren Beatty is anymore and nobody gave a shit about him back then either.
is this a gibberish or a rational reply i dont know
 

DangerAardvark

Diamond Member
Oct 22, 2004
7,581
0
0
Originally posted by: simondedalus
Originally posted by: shortylickens
Originally posted by: DrPizza
You know you're a computer addict when you continue to repeat things that you found in your email, despite everyone else telling you they've seen it a thousand times already.
FOR THE WIN!!!

And either dump or change the first one.
Nobody even knows who Warren Beatty is anymore and nobody gave a shit about him back then either.
is this a gibberish or a rational reply i dont know
There are a lot of things you don't know.
 

Fritzo

Lifer
Jan 3, 2001
41,470
1,642
126
Awww...grandma forwarded him a chain letter and he thought he'd post it :)
 

simondedalus

Member
Jul 13, 2007
154
0
0

you are a versatile genius a master of all.........because you know that i dont not know







Originally posted by: DangerAardvark
Originally posted by: simondedalus
Originally posted by: shortylickens
Originally posted by: DrPizza
You know you're a computer addict when you continue to repeat things that you found in your email, despite everyone else telling you they've seen it a thousand times already.
FOR THE WIN!!!

And either dump or change the first one.
Nobody even knows who Warren Beatty is anymore and nobody gave a shit about him back then either.
is this a gibberish or a rational reply i dont know
There are a lot of things you don't know.
 

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