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npoe1

Senior member
Jul 28, 2005
592
0
76
How do you do to forget your ex-girlfriend if you had her for 6 years?, It has been 3 months and I still can not forget her, actually it hurts more with Christmas coming, I really need to forget her but I don?t want to get another girl to do that, I don?t think is fair.

Does someone have suggestions with this problem?
 
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hypn0tik

Diamond Member
Jul 5, 2005
5,866
2
0
Have sexual intercourse with another member of the opposite (or same if you prefer) sex.
 
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mpitts

Lifer
Jun 9, 2000
14,732
1
81
It may not be fair, but getting another girl is the easiest way.

I had a hard time getting over my ex some years ago. It wasn't until I met someone else that I stopped obsessing over her.
 
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npoe1

Senior member
Jul 28, 2005
592
0
76
So I have no way to forget unless I use another woman? Really, that is an answer that I was trying to not get, but it will be better than nothing.
 
uberman

uberman

Golden Member
Sep 15, 2006
1,942
1
81
Put away all the triggers that make you think of her. You know, the gifts she gave you, the pictures of her, the photo albums of stuff you did together need to go in a box and put it in the closet. You can open the box a year from now after you're over this. Don't obssess over places you went together, try a new place. Enjoy your freedom.
 
winr

winr

Diamond Member
Feb 17, 2001
6,081
56
91
Hi npoe1.

Getting someone else to forget someone is not fair if you using them only for that purpose.

You do not want someone else because you are still emotianally attched to your previous girlfriend.

I have been there and it is never easy for me.

Do you have true Friends you that will listen to you and be there for you??


Best wishes and PM me if you need someone to talk to.:sun:


EDIT:

3 months is not a long time to forget someone, some people take a lot longer.

Time will heal you I promise.....it really will , you have to tell yourself that one day you will be ok.............really.

Richard.


:)


 
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npoe1

Senior member
Jul 28, 2005
592
0
76
Thanks

I?m trying hard in work I actually got a promotion and there is a new one that I could get in the first quarter of the next year (because of budgets and things like that), trying to forget her working is useful while I?m still working but after that I have no one to share my achievements and that make me remember her more and hurts even more.
 
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AStar617

Diamond Member
Sep 29, 2002
4,983
0
0
Note that I never said anything about "using" anybody without their consent. But this thread didn't end at my declaration so I'll elaborate. :)

Trying to stay busy will not work in the long run--a band-aid over the real infection. You really do need a new female companion to fully take her place. Diving headfirst back into a committed relationship may not be the best thing for you right away, though. Why does this seem wrong? You could stand to benefit from something without rigid definitions or expectations, just two consenting adults enjoying each other's company.

Details of who broke up with who, and why,would help here. I'm assuming from the tone that she broke up with you, but I'm not sure.
 
winr

winr

Diamond Member
Feb 17, 2001
6,081
56
91
Hi npoe1.

Congrats on your promotion!!



We Humans put value on all kinds of things.............

Sometimes we put to much value on things that do not actually have as much value we assign to them....


We put blinders on when someone we care about leaves us, it feels like nothing will ever be ok ever again.

I have done this 4 times before and believed it each time.

Guess what, I am ok..........again!! :D

You will also be ok.:sun:

Really..........no kidding, soon you will go, oh wow, I am ok and you will be like you used to be.


Best wishes.


:)


 
winr

winr

Diamond Member
Feb 17, 2001
6,081
56
91
I would like to add........

All of my Friends, Female and Male have asked me how I could seperate from a GF and not go out with someone else to ease the pain or get better as this is how they all handled breaking up with someone.

I am a little different than most people I have met.

I handle all of my problems differently than most People.


Everyone deals with things different and 2 consenting People that are honest with each other can do as they wish.

:sun:
 
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George P Burdell

Lifer
Aug 25, 2004
11,151
1
81
You'll never forget her, but with time you'll miss her less. Move on. Pick up new hobbies, especially those involving meeting new people. Keep yourself occupied. Try jumping back onto the dating bandwagon.

How not to do it:
1. Alcohol (lots of it)
2. Drugs
3. Smokes
 
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Chrono

Diamond Member
Jan 2, 2001
4,959
0
71
Coincidentally I'm in the same boat as you. My ex of almost 4 years broke up with me 3 months ago and so far I've been pretty good with dealing with it by going to work, hanging with friends and working out like a madman. Her bday just past and Christmas is almost here, just too many memories pop up in my mind. It all seems kinda surreal even.
 
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LookingGlass

Platinum Member
Jul 8, 2005
2,823
0
71
You cannot force yourself to meet someone, of course, just to have sex, sure, but, that's not what you want. That will only be a temporary fix anyway, your mind will probably still be on her. That's a long time, 6 years. Give it time to meet someone, sure look, you need a friend right now.

1. Time, as cliche' as it sounds, time.
2. Do things that are good for you, with family and friends.
3. Stay busy.
4. Do some reading.
5. Discover some new hobbies, anything interest you, that you'd like to try?
6. Volunteer during the holidays, giving back, and giving of yourself, will make you feel more worthwhile about yourself, since you've lost her.

Those are just a few, do things again, that are good for you, stay away from the booze and crap, it doesn't help. You'll make it. :)
 
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huberm

Golden Member
Dec 17, 2004
1,105
1
0
I broke up with my gf of 7 years a year ago. I am still not over her.

You might be in for a long haul my friend.
 
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IceBergSLiM

Lifer
Jul 11, 2000
29,932
3
81
Originally posted by: npoe1
So I have no way to forget unless I use another woman? Really, that is an answer that I was trying to not get, but it will be better than nothing.
Click to expand...

people use people all the time don't get hung up on that. Just make sure expectations are set early on. if they know you are just out of a relationship they should be wary that you are on the rebound. If your cards are on the table up front, you should be guilt free.
 
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Garet Jax

Diamond Member
Feb 21, 2000
6,369
0
71
Originally posted by: npoe1
How do you do to forget your ex-girlfriend if you had her for 6 years?, It has been 3 months and I still can not forget her, actually it hurts more with Christmas coming, I really need to forget her but I don?t want to get another girl to do that, I don?t think is fair.

Does someone have suggestions with this problem?
Click to expand...

Time is your only answer my friend.
 
sixone

sixone

Lifer
May 3, 2004
25,030
5
61
OP, you're trying to break a six-year habit. It's going to take more than three months. Don't be so hard on yourself.

The best thing you can do is focus on something else - working out, a hobby, whatever. When you find yourself thinking about what you've lost, bring your focus back to what you have now. It's not an easy habit to get into, but if you keep at it, you will get there.
 
MaxDepth

MaxDepth

Diamond Member
Jun 12, 2001
8,757
43
91
Drunken Office Parties!!!

Or
spend more time with family (uhm, yours not hers)
hang out with friends
hobbies or sports fan? try meeting up with people who like the same hobbies or go to a sports bar that shows the games of your favorite team(s). Wear your team's colors if possible.

I was in your shoes a long time ago and it sucked, especially around the holidays. But I did those things that I said and it worked for me. I neither love nor hate my ex. I just simply don't care or really think about her because I moved on.
 
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