YAGT: Why do we make the choices that we do?

[Mill]

I knew she had to leave. Her time here was limited. We both promised that it wouldn't get serious and that we'd take it slow. We both lied. It was supposed to last longer, but sometimes life doesn't allow that. She'll be gone soon rather than later, and all I will do is think about what could've been instead of what we actually had. I'm not so terribly upset -- it was an eventual certainty, but I thought it would be later. I don't really want to talk to her, because I don't like saying goodbye. All our plans and ideas have now be ended with no chance to even take off.

I guess this is life. Guys, don't get involved with someone who is only here for awhile. You'll regret it.

 

[Willoughbyva]

What do you mean by leave? Like death or like leaving the area you are in?

Sorry to hear it man.
Hope you feel better.

Perry

 

[Kntx]

Are you kidding?

Getting involved with someone who is only around for a while is the best thing you can do! No strings attached!

 

[Willoughbyva]

Maybe he wanted strings.

 

[olds]

Human nature. We always long for what we can't have.

 

[Koing]

It's hard

But plenty more fish in the sea . Even though that isn't what you wanted to hear or you already knew.

Koing

 

[Mill]

Originally posted by: Willoughbyva
What do you mean by leave? Like death or like leaving the area you are in?

Sorry to hear it man.
Hope you feel better.

Perry

Leaving the area.

 

[Red Dawn]

Originally posted by: Mill

Originally posted by: Willoughbyva
What do you mean by leave? Like death or like leaving the area you are in?

Sorry to hear it man.
Hope you feel better.

Perry

Leaving the area.

Go with her..unless you weren't invited.

 

[Willoughbyva]

Red that might be a good idea. Depends on his situation though.

 

[LookingGlass]

Originally posted by: Red Dawn

Originally posted by: Mill

Originally posted by: Willoughbyva
What do you mean by leave? Like death or like leaving the area you are in?

Sorry to hear it man.
Hope you feel better.

Perry

Leaving the area.

Go with her..unless you weren't invited.

Long distance relationships are hard, depends on the couple. If you are young, still in school, high school or college, makes it that much tougher. The older you are, more financially able you are to move, and make it work, just depends.

Don't regret it, just take it for what it is, value the time you had. Sounds like you did have a good time, treasure that. Who knows, maybe things might change. Life is strange sometimes.

 

[Mill]

Originally posted by: Red Dawn

Originally posted by: Mill

Originally posted by: Willoughbyva
What do you mean by leave? Like death or like leaving the area you are in?

Sorry to hear it man.
Hope you feel better.

Perry

Leaving the area.

Go with her..unless you weren't invited.

Part of me wants to, but I can't. I knew this would be the ending, but I guess I convinced myself the future was a lot farther ahead. She's got her life and I've got mine. I can't expect her to stay with me and change her life and plans, because I can't do that myself. The biggest factor, though, is that it is a unique circumstance. She's not an American citizen, so there's no real way she could say. Her parents want her to finish University in Colombia. I was planning to study there next year for a semester (not just because of her, but I have four real close friends in Bogota), but now? I don't know that I will.

I'm too entrenched where I am. I have my family here, my house, my friends, and my dogs. How could I expect her to leave those things if I wouldn't? And we won't get married. I'm not ready for that and neither is she.

I just hate that I made a decision to get involved over my best interests. I'm hurt -- that's no lie, but I'm also relieved. If was never going to have a happy ending. Our original plan was that we were gonna go to another country and she was gonna come back on her tourist visa for 3 months. We were gonna spend Christmas in NYC, and then I was going to Bogota to study at Los Andes University. I figured there would be an ending in 2007 not now.

 

[Aquaman]

Sorry to hear it....... but if you don't try things (even when you know the out come) you gonna be one sorry pimp farmer fapping away at Brittany photos.

Is she going to be away a long time?

Cheers,
Aquaman

 

[EngenZerO]

move with her!!!

my new look at YAGT... just gonna give the exact opposite advice as what the norm is, LOL.

 

[Mill]

I haven't gone to see her yet today, but I'm about to in a bit. She's real upset and crying, but I'm not. In fact, I'm even less emotional than I was when I made this thread, and I wasn't upset then. She's making the decision to do what she's doing. She could stay for several more months and it wouldn't harm her schooling or anything.

I guess the caveat I forgot to mention is that she's going to NYC for 2 months before going back to Bogota. She's absolutely convinced she can make more money working there than here. Which is a total cracksmoking type of idea. She won't acknowledge cost of living and the like.

I should be upset. I'm losing someone I care a lot about, but I don't love her. I care strongly about her and it is possible that one day I would love her, but not now. I almost feel like I'm going to be free.

 

[doze]

I know it sux, but sometimes the best times with girls are the short times b/c you haven't got to the point where you annoy each other yet. Go spend a weekend or two in NYC and enjoy yourself.

 

[JS80]

Why? FTP. That's why.

 

[LordMorpheus]

college?

 

[Feneant2]

All I gotta say is its NOT better to have loved and lost than not to have loved at all.

I think I would prefer never loving a person than eventually losing them. I don't get why friggin evolution did not make us so we would be born knowing who we would marry. Men and women both, everyone hates a broken heart so why have we not evolved beyond that?

 

[Feneant2]

Even has to say it twice to make my point

 

[gotsmack]

Originally posted by: Mill
I haven't gone to see her yet today, but I'm about to in a bit. She's real upset and crying, but I'm not. In fact, I'm even less emotional than I was when I made this thread, and I wasn't upset then. She's making the decision to do what she's doing. She could stay for several more months and it wouldn't harm her schooling or anything.

I guess the caveat I forgot to mention is that she's going to NYC for 2 months before going back to Bogota. She's absolutely convinced she can make more money working there than here. Which is a total cracksmoking type of idea. She won't acknowledge cost of living and the like.

I should be upset. I'm losing someone I care a lot about, but I don't love her. I care strongly about her and it is possible that one day I would love her, but not now. I almost feel like I'm going to be free.

Maybe if she was whole selling coke, or there is some sort of oil & natural gas business there that she can get into- then she could make more money, but otherwise all the money is here in the states, we're the larget market in terms of buying power.

Something like your situation happened in the TV show How I Met Your Mother, and one of the characters said- If you found out you were going to lose your leg tomorrow would you spend the last day with your leg being depressed or would you be out running and doing awsome airkicks?

 

[Sc4freak]

Originally posted by: Feneant2
All I gotta say is its NOT better to have loved and lost than not to have loved at all.

I think I would prefer never loving a person than eventually losing them. I don't get why friggin evolution did not make us so we would be born knowing who we would marry. Men and women both, everyone hates a broken heart so why have we not evolved beyond that?

Because life is a world of pain, my friend.

 

[alphatarget1]

Originally posted by: Mill
I knew she had to leave. Her time here was limited. We both promised that it wouldn't get serious and that we'd take it slow. We both lied. It was supposed to last longer, but sometimes life doesn't allow that. She'll be gone soon rather than later, and all I will do is think about what could've been instead of what we actually had. I'm not so terribly upset -- it was an eventual certainty, but I thought it would be later. I don't really want to talk to her, because I don't like saying goodbye. All our plans and ideas have now be ended with no chance to even take off.

I guess this is life. Guys, don't get involved with someone who is only here for awhile. You'll regret it.

I'm in an exact situation you're in, and I'm leaving her in 2 days. I couldn't be more happy than what my girlfriend and I had in the past 2 months and she changed me forever, even though it means it'll be over really soon. Maybe it's impossible to keep a relationship 6000 miles away, but I still have a friend whom I care for deeply.