YAGT: How to keep girls on standby?

[slackerinabox]

This happens to me and I don't have a method - I just let possible relationships wither away because of my schedule.

OK, here's the situation, in outline form:
The names of the parties have been changed to prevent me being called a tool for posting private things online again:

1. I've been very busy lately - I'm helping my parents move and also am moving myself, plus my job keeps me busy all the time. My parents aren't saavy so I've been hiring moving crews/contracters for renovations, and managing everything for TWO apartments. It's a lot of work and I've been leaving my apartment for work at 7 am and getting home at 2 or 3 am - I barely have time for people, including girls.

-I'll be this busy until the 2nd week of august

GIRL 1 - VERONICA
-A nice girl who I hung out with a few times and have always enjoyed hanging out with.

-We're not too close and part of that distance coudl be attributed to her having a boyfriend. She's cute but I've never made a move since I'm not that sorta guy, but I am attracted to her

- She's NOT like a super close friend, to clear that up...

- I haven't spoken to her in about 3 weeks since I haven't gone online and I don't really call people. She IMs me today asking if I wanted to join her for dinner

- There's a weird tone to her conversation - I'm thinking she just broke up with her bf because I turned her down for dinner tonight and said I'd get back to her - she said "anytime' and wondered if I'd like to go on a walk or something low key, which makes me think she's a) depressed/lonely and b) single

GIRL 2 - JESSIE

- Never met her, yes, a stupid internet dating thing
- She's been texting me every weekend for 2 weeks now but i've always had to turn her down
-She's a personal trainer.. just thought i'd mention that

MY big problem is that I don't have time right now. How to keep these girl's at bay without investing much time in them now so that I can take care what I have to do? I know I can be honest but, in the past, girls would be single one week and taken the next. Is there any ideas for me to be responsible and do what I have to do while still keeping these girls interested?

 

[Cdubneeddeal]

It's not nice to keep the girls on standby. You're obviously too busy for a relationship. Tell them both you are extremely busy and leave it at that. It's not fair to be keep both girls in wonder for however long until your life frees up some.

 

[slackerinabox]

Originally posted by: Cdubneeddeal
It's not nice to keep the girls on standby. You're obviously too busy for a relationship. Tell them both you are extremely busy and leave it at that. It's not fair to be keep both girls in wonder for however long until your life frees up some.

That phrase 'too busy for a relationship' always seemed so tacky to me. I'm busy NOW, but most of my time is spent watching dvds - I'm usually not 'too busy for' anything. So i'm not trying to string these girls along for months, but I do know that waiting even a few weeks can be risky when it comes to girls, so i'm trying to just not lose interest /forget about me.

 

[NanoStuff]

The first one, she's desperate. Desperate girls, well... low standards are not a good thing.

The second one, just send her a picture of yourself, problem solved.

It's not that hard really.

 

[sixone]

Originally posted by: Cdubneeddeal
It's not nice to keep the girls on standby. You're obviously too busy for a relationship. Tell them both you are extremely busy and leave it at that. It's not fair to be keep both girls in wonder for however long until your life frees up some.

:thumbsup:

 

[MX2]

Originally posted by: sixone

Originally posted by: Cdubneeddeal
It's not nice to keep the girls on standby. You're obviously too busy for a relationship. Tell them both you are extremely busy and leave it at that. It's not fair to be keep both girls in wonder for however long until your life frees up some.

:thumbsup:

Double :thumbsup:

 

[slackerinabox]

Originally posted by: NanoStuff
The first one, she's desperate. Desperate girls, well... low standards are not a good thing.

The second one, just send her a picture of yourself, problem solved.

It's not that hard really.

hah, douche... Girl #1 isn't a desperate sort, I think she's just lonely. I've sent girl #2 a picture of myself and she's still calling me.. maybe she's near sighted?

 

[mcvickj]

7am to 3 am? 8 hour work shift? That leaves 13 hours to be busy with moving? Yikes!

The one thing I've learned is that everyone is always "busy" but if they truely want something they will make the effort to set aside some time for the things that are importain.

 

[doze]

Sounds like Veronica wants to hook up so call her back tonight and go chill with her for an hour or two to find out what the deal is. If you have time to post on ATOT you have time to investigate some possible free poon. Maybe she just wants to get back at her boyfriend by sleeping with you.

You haven't even met Jessie so who cares.

 

[imported_LoKe]

Originally posted by: MX2times

Originally posted by: sixone

Originally posted by: Cdubneeddeal
It's not nice to keep the girls on standby. You're obviously too busy for a relationship. Tell them both you are extremely busy and leave it at that. It's not fair to be keep both girls in wonder for however long until your life frees up some.

:thumbsup:

Double :thumbsup:

:thumbsup::thumbsup:

 

[slackerinabox]

Originally posted by: mcvickj
7am to 3 am? 8 hour work shift? That leaves 13 hours to busy with moving? Yikes!

The one thing I've learned is that everyone is always "busy" but if they truely want something they will make the effort to set aside some time for the things that are importain.

My parents are being ... thrifty.. So i'm working as assistants for 2 seperate crews - "need dry wall? i'll get it!" Yesterday alone I spent 9 hours shopping, lugging stuff around and just going crazy. They're also not very.. Saavy? That's the nicest way of putting it.. Here's one story so that you can understand the stress i'm going through : my parents call me on friday, they said they need a fridge moved. I schedule the move for sunday at 11:30 - no problem. I call them at 12 to make sure that everything's ok - they forgot to clean out the fridge and my dad is no where to be found and he has the keys! That's the one tiny task I trusted them with and they screwed it up. So i'm doing everything...

I hear what you're saying generally. Just now is a time I just can't make time. I just need to keep these girls interested for 2 weeks! then I can get shot down on my own terms

 

[ruffilb]

Originally posted by: LoKe

Originally posted by: MX2times

Originally posted by: sixone

Originally posted by: Cdubneeddeal
It's not nice to keep the girls on standby. You're obviously too busy for a relationship. Tell them both you are extremely busy and leave it at that. It's not fair to be keep both girls in wonder for however long until your life frees up some.

:thumbsup:

Double :thumbsup:

:thumbsup::thumbsup:

Quadruple :thumbsup:

 

[slackerinabox]

Originally posted by: doze
Sounds like Veronica wants to hook up so call her back tonight and go chill with her for an hour or two to find out what the deal is. If you have time to post on ATOT you have time to investigate some possible free poon. Maybe she just wants to get back at her boyfriend by sleeping with you.

You haven't even met Jessie so who cares.

Too late - I already turned her down. I just got back from lugging a 650 pounds tv down 2 flights of stairs and I just didn't have the energy to be charming.

Free poon? I should have made more of an effort based on my current streak (or lack thereof). though, wait, "i respect her too much to take advantage of her".. i was only being slightly sarcastic

 

[sixone]

Originally posted by: freedomsbeat212

Originally posted by: mcvickj
7am to 3 am? 8 hour work shift? That leaves 13 hours to busy with moving? Yikes!

The one thing I've learned is that everyone is always "busy" but if they truely want something they will make the effort to set aside some time for the things that are importain.

My parents are being ... thrifty.. So i'm working as assistants for 2 seperate crews - "need dry wall? i'll get it!" Yesterday alone I spent 9 hours shopping, lugging stuff around and just going crazy. They're also not very.. Saavy? That's the nicest way of putting it.. Here's one story so that you can understand the stress i'm going through : my parents call me on friday, they said they need a fridge moved. I schedule the move for sunday at 11:30 - no problem. I call them at 12 to make sure that everything's ok - they forgot to clean out the fridge and my dad is no where to be found and he has the keys! That's the one tiny task I trusted them with and they screwed it up. So i'm doing everything...

I hear what you're saying generally. Just now is a time I just can't make time. I just need to keep these girls interested for 2 weeks! then I can get shot down on my own terms

If they don't stay interested for two weeks, you're better off without. If they meet someone else in the meantime, then you're just SOL. That's just the way the cookie crumbles.

 

[eits]

keeping a girl on standby is easy.

step 1: call the girl and make plans with her. seem REALLY interested and excited about your plans.
step 2: a day before your scheduled plans with said girl, cancel and reschedule. make up something, but make sure you make up something that she couldn't be mad at you about.
step 3: whenever you are done with the other girl, call this girl back and make sure everything's ready for your upcoming date.
step 4: rinse and repeat.

 

[Cdubneeddeal]

Originally posted by: eits
keeping a girl on standby is easy.

step 1: call the girl and make plans with her. seem REALLY interested and excited about your plans.
step 2: a day before your scheduled plans with said girl, cancel and reschedule. make up something, but make sure you make up something that she couldn't be mad at you about.
step 3: whenever you are done with the other girl, call this girl back and make sure everything's ready for your upcoming date.
step 4: rinse and repeat.

If I ever did that I would feel ashamed of myself. I just don't see how anyone can see relationships and dating as a game. This isn't a rap song

 

[sixone]

Originally posted by: eits
keeping a girl on standby is easy.

step 1: call the girl and make plans with her. seem REALLY interested and excited about your plans.
step 2: a day before your scheduled plans with said girl, cancel and reschedule. make up something, but make sure you make up something that she couldn't be mad at you about.
step 3: whenever you are done with the other girl, call this girl back and make sure everything's ready for your upcoming date.
step 4: rinse and repeat.

Keeping her interested once she figures out what a lying SOB you are is a little more difficult.

 

[doze]

Originally posted by: freedomsbeat212

Originally posted by: doze
Sounds like Veronica wants to hook up so call her back tonight and go chill with her for an hour or two to find out what the deal is. If you have time to post on ATOT you have time to investigate some possible free poon. Maybe she just wants to get back at her boyfriend by sleeping with you.

You haven't even met Jessie so who cares.

Too late - I already turned her down. I just got back from lugging a 650 pounds tv down 2 flights of stairs and I just didn't have the energy to be charming.

Free poon? I should have made more of an effort based on my current streak (or lack thereof). though, wait, "i respect her too much to take advantage of her".. i was only being slightly sarcastic

But what if she wants to take advantage of you? Seriously though I'm in a bit of a dry spell myself so if I get the chance I will at least investigate. But you don't have to string her along or break fake plans. Just talk to the girl every few days for a few minutes and she'll know your still interested

 

[eits]

Originally posted by: sixone

Originally posted by: eits
keeping a girl on standby is easy.

step 1: call the girl and make plans with her. seem REALLY interested and excited about your plans.
step 2: a day before your scheduled plans with said girl, cancel and reschedule. make up something, but make sure you make up something that she couldn't be mad at you about.
step 3: whenever you are done with the other girl, call this girl back and make sure everything's ready for your upcoming date.
step 4: rinse and repeat.

Keeping her interested once she figures out what a lying SOB you are is a little more difficult.

yup, but that's why you don't get caught.

i'm not saying that i felt good about doing this... i'm just saying that it's easy to do. i don't do it anymore.

dating IS a game of sorts... you're trying your best to figure out who's the right person to be with and you don't want to waste time doing it. if you can find a girl who's worth being with and be completely honest and faithful to, you win.

 

[Kntx]

Originally posted by: Cdubneeddeal

Originally posted by: eits
keeping a girl on standby is easy.

step 1: call the girl and make plans with her. seem REALLY interested and excited about your plans.
step 2: a day before your scheduled plans with said girl, cancel and reschedule. make up something, but make sure you make up something that she couldn't be mad at you about.
step 3: whenever you are done with the other girl, call this girl back and make sure everything's ready for your upcoming date.
step 4: rinse and repeat.

If I ever did that I would feel ashamed of myself. I just don't see how anyone can see relationships and dating as a game. This isn't a rap song

It's not a game... it's how you have to deal with women. They just can't be reasoned with.