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YAGT: 2 ex-bf's of a girl start to communicate.

B

BigToque

Lifer
My ex and I broke up almost a year ago, however we are still good friends and have a very tight group of mutual friends.

She has a new (now ex-bf), who has been calling me and threating to "break my legs", etc. Really stupid stuff.

Anyway, she gave him my secondary email address (apparently he asked her for it) and sent me an "apology"

BillyBob,

My apologies for insulting you the other night and I do not wish to be enemies with any body. Your past efforts of reconciliation with [ex-gf] would not please anyone in my situation, and am still wary of your current intentions. I know you were good friends in the past and can hopefully maintain that relationship on that level as is her desire.

JoeSmith
Click to expand...

My response (still writing):

JoeSmith,

Nobody ever wants to have enemies or be in situations where the people involved have negative feelings towards each other. All people have to judge these situations by is the actions of those involved. Based on my direct experience and first hand accounts of people that are friends of myself, friends of [ex-gf] and of people that (I know personally) know you, I have absolutely no reason to think anything positive about you or your involvement with [ex-gf] (whatever that may be at this point in time or any time in the future).

My intentions for any relationship I have with anyone (platonic, romantic or otherwise), whether that be with [ex-gf] or anyone else, are of no concern to you. No matter how wary, uncertain, insecure or jealous my relationship with [ex-gf] makes you, it is something you are just going to have to live with. [ex-gf] and I will always be friends.

There is absolutely no reason for insults, threats or harassing phone calls.

I do appreciate your apology.

BillyBob
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Seems pretty straight forward, but I want to know if this is acceptable. This guy is a total tool and nobody seems to like him, but he keeps showing up to everything all the time, even when he's not wanted.

What would you add or change?

In case it wasn't totally clear, this guy is also now an ex-bf of my ex-gf.
 
Your past efforts of reconciliation with [ex-gf] would not please anyone in my situation, and am still wary of your current intentions.

wtf is that
 
Email fight!!!

If a guy threatens me, I usually ignore him.. or tell him to f'ckoff.. whatever I feel like at the time. Why bother coming up with such a long reply.

Here's a template:

Dear XX,

Shuddup.

Sincerely,

YY
 
Originally posted by: brxndxn
Email fight!!!

If a guy threatens me, I usually ignore him.. or tell him to f'ckoff.. whatever I feel like at the time. Why bother coming up with such a long reply.

Here's a template:

Dear XX,

Shuddup.

Sincerely,

YY
Click to expand...

Well, I don't really feeling like taking this situation any further so I'm trying to be as level headed and mature as possible, while still getting my point across.
 
"Since your threats, I have been pumping iron and learning jiu jitsu in anticipation of our showdown. I will not let all this hard work go to waste. What day would you like me to beat your brains out?"

I think that should do it.
 
Originally posted by: puffff
"Since your threats, I have been pumping iron and learning jiu jitsu in anticipation of our showdown. I will not let all this hard work go to waste. What day would you like me to beat your brains out?"

I think that should do it.
Click to expand...

lol
 
Sounds like he isn't capable of hurting you, as if he was he would've done something instead of sending an e-mail.
 
hahaha. i'm gonna try to hang out with my ex to see what the new douchebag b/f will do. i've known the dude since he was in 1st grade. lol. this is gonna be fun!!!!!!
 
Originally posted by: Chrono
hahaha. i'm gonna try to hang out with my ex to see what the new douchebag b/f will do. i've known the dude since he was in 1st grade. lol. this is gonna be fun!!!!!!
Click to expand...

In case it wasn't totally clear, this guy is also now an ex-bf of my ex-gf.
 
I wouldn't even speak to a primate like that... but then, it would take a female primate to date one, and I wouldn't in turn date her, so I guess it's not a situation I'd ever have to deal with... *throws OP a banana*
 
you should of just said there is no reason you should be wary of my intentions, as they are none of your business. [ex-gf] and I are friends, apparently you have issues with that, which is what you and you only need to deal with. No one has a problem except you.

that's what I would have said, but what you said sums it up pretty well. I just would have ponted out that he kind of refuted his apology by stating he was wary of your intentions which is pointless if you are going to apologize.

 
you're writing way too much, and you shouldn't have to explain yourself. Just keep it short and simple. I'd say something like

"actions speak louder than words, however if your apology is sincere I will accept it and we won't have a problem"

either that or go with puffff's idea
 
So he has a problem with you being friends with his ex-g/f who was your ex-g/f before he came on the scene? How idiotic.
 
Originally posted by: BigToque
Originally posted by: brxndxn
Email fight!!!

If a guy threatens me, I usually ignore him.. or tell him to f'ckoff.. whatever I feel like at the time. Why bother coming up with such a long reply.

Here's a template:

Dear XX,

Shuddup.

Sincerely,

YY
Click to expand...

Well, I don't really feeling like taking this situation any further so I'm trying to be as level headed and mature as possible, while still getting my point across.
Click to expand...


no no no see even though your response is written intelligently and well, it is clearly aimed and pissing him off. As long as he understands big words he is going to understand that you are putting him down. He wrote his email to you apologizing but basically pleading from one guy to another to back off and that he still wants the girl and just trying to make sure that you aren't trying to be more than friends. Your response iis going to tell him that you ARE trying to be mroe than friends with your ex (now his ex aswell) and that you don't care about him, his feelings, his situation, yet you don't want to fight or threaten each other.

so either say it more opening as "fvxk off," email back apologizing too and telling him you don't want your ex back, or just ignore it and do not respond
 
Originally posted by: BillyBatson
no no no see even though your response is written intelligently and well, it is clearly aimed and pissing him off. As long as he understands big words he is going to understand that you are putting him down. He wrote his email to you apologizing but basically pleading from one guy to another to back off and that he still wants the girl and just trying to make sure that you aren't trying to be more than friends. Your response iis going to tell him that you ARE trying to be mroe than friends with your ex (now his ex aswell) and that you don't care about him, his feelings, his situation, yet you don't want to fight or threaten each other.

so either say it more opening as "fvxk off," email back apologizing too and telling him you don't want your ex back, or just ignore it and do not respond
Click to expand...

To me, it's aimed at telling the guy that BigToque's relationship (be it platonic or intimate) is none of his business anymore. Unless there's some state of matrimony (or intended), one guy does not control a girl, so his threats were not only completely ludicrous, but they are also rude toward the ex-girlfriend who has every right to be friends with BigToque, regardless of the rude ex's status with the ex-girlfriend. This guy has some control issues.
 
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