YADT

[judasmachine]

This summer I will be going to Puerto Rico with a couple of friends. I want to be able to walk about the beach with no shirt on, and not feel like a slob. I am 5' 8", and I weigh between 150 and 155 lbs. I am in the normal range of BMI, but I am a bit soft in the middle as the only real exercise I get is biking which I do regularly. Everything else I'm happy with, although I could use a bit of color. I look like Casper the Friendly Ghost. So besides cycling, what else do you guys do to get beach ready? I'm not trying to look like a douche, but I don't want to look like someone who sits behind his computer all day everyday either.

 

[purbeast0]

yea we don't have a forum dedicated specifically to health and fitness or anything.

 

[judasmachine]

d'oh, sorry. i'll get used to the new forums sooner or later.

 

[Mr Pickles]

You might get moved to H&F soon. but if you are interested in looking like you are in shape I suggest losing the bike and hitting the gym. If you are in the normal weight range then you're in a good starting position to change your diet and spend 40 minutes or so doing some upper body lifting 3 days a week. There's a lot to it so read up. You don't have a lot of time, so don't expect anything amazing, but you get your best gains right from the beginning so you might be satisfied.

Oh and jacked and tan are hand in hand. Little known fact, you lift weights you get tanner instantly. Say g'bye to casper.

That last part was a joke. Get a freaking tan...

 

[Atomic Playboy]

Do ab exercises (sit-ups, crunches, that type of shit) to get a little muscle definition in the belly. Run, bike, or do other aerobic exercise to help take off the excess fat. And of course, consume fewer calories in a day than you use (this is the only way you will lose weight, as you basically need to body to consume itself to fuel it). That, or just wait til you get to Puerto Rico and drink a big glass of tap water. You'll lose 15 pounds overnight.

As far as color, you can't beat a spray on tan. Actually, I've found that you can; a can of orange spraypaint is slightly cheaper and looks just as good (although the paint will clog your pores and you could die).

 

[judasmachine]

Originally posted by: Atomic Playboy
Do ab exercises (sit-ups, crunches, that type of shit) to get a little muscle definition in the belly. Run, bike, or do other aerobic exercise to help take off the excess fat. And of course, consume fewer calories in a day than you use (this is the only way you will lose weight, as you basically need to body to consume itself to fuel it). That, or just wait til you get to Puerto Rico and drink a big glass of tap water. You'll lose 15 pounds overnight.

As far as color, you can't beat a spray on tan. Actually, I've found that you can; a can of orange spraypaint is slightly cheaper and looks just as good (although the paint will clog your pores and you could die).

please read where i say i am trying not to look like a douchebag. and yeah the new girl is a healthnut, so she keeps me well under what i need for the day. i've already taken off about 10 lbs in the last five months.

 

[Atomic Playboy]

Originally posted by: judasmachine

Originally posted by: Atomic Playboy
Do ab exercises (sit-ups, crunches, that type of shit) to get a little muscle definition in the belly. Run, bike, or do other aerobic exercise to help take off the excess fat. And of course, consume fewer calories in a day than you use (this is the only way you will lose weight, as you basically need to body to consume itself to fuel it). That, or just wait til you get to Puerto Rico and drink a big glass of tap water. You'll lose 15 pounds overnight.

As far as color, you can't beat a spray on tan. Actually, I've found that you can; a can of orange spraypaint is slightly cheaper and looks just as good (although the paint will clog your pores and you could die).

please read where i say i am trying not to look like a douchebag. and yeah the new girl is a healthnut, so she keeps me well under what i need for the day. i've already taken off about 10 lbs in the last five months.

I'm pretty sure if your guts are pouring out both ends of your body simultaneously, people will not immediately think "douchebag" when they look at you; they're much more likely to think "goner" or "check please" depending on where you are (I recommend doing this in the middle of a crowded buffet; the reactions will be priceless).

One thing I do to prep myself for the beach is to break-in my banana hammocks about a month early. Don't want to look too stiff out there. I also practice building sand castles, because it's a good way to impress chicks; if you change your mind about being a douche, you can practice kicking the sand castle over too. You'll be in the tropics, which means getting used to drinks with little umbrellas in them; I'd practice drinking punchbowl sized hurricanes and pina coladas because nothing is worse than getting stabbed in the eye by the tiny umbrella you were unprepared for. Actually, drinking punchbowl sized hurricanes is a good way to prepare yourself for most things; weddings, job interviews, court, etc.

You'll be in a foreign country, so you should brush up on how to speak to foreigners. Don't use Spanish, they'll think you're being condescending. Instead, you must prepare yourself to speak English very slowly and loudly. It's important to practice this because if you go unprepared for all the hollering you will need to do to get your point across, you can easily strain your vocal cords. Probably best to brush up on your emphatic gesturing as well; you don't want to throw your shoulder out trying to find the nearest buffet when you need a place to vomit.

Good luck, and have fun!