YADALT: Yet Another Dear Abby Letter Thread

jdini76

Platinum Member
Mar 16, 2001
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DEAR ABBY: My name is "Johnny." I am 18 and currently incarcerated. I was locked up last March and won't be out for another five months. I'm facing a terrible problem when I get out and I need your help.

I have a girlfriend, "Brianna," who I love with all my heart and will do anything for. We have been together since I was 14. She has been with me through everything. She's now pregnant with my baby. Her cousin and her best friend are also pregnant. They all know each other is pregnant, but the cousin and friend haven't told Brianna that I'm the father. She has been asking questions, but they tell her they're "not sure." They insist that it's my place to tell her.

My mother secretly pays for each of the girls' doctor visits and everything they need, but she says she can't keep sneaking around doing this.

It's killing me knowing I'll have to hurt my girlfriend. I don't want her to leave me because I love her, and she has both of my cars, my motorcycle and the house I bought. I'm afraid she will destroy them when she finds out. I'm so worried I can't sleep. Please tell me what to do. -- JOHNNY-IN-A-SPOT

DEAR JOHNNY: As I see it, you have three choices: ask to join a witness protection program, beg for an extended sentence -- or start acting like a man and take responsibility for your actions. Count on your girlfriend being upset when you tell her. That's a normal reaction to finding out the person she loved and trusted cheated on her with two other women -- her best friend and her cousin.

While you're talking, suggest that she do nothing rash, because you may have to sell the cars, the motorcycle and the house to live up to your financial obligations to all three of your children.



--Holy Cow!
 

HumblePie

Lifer
Oct 30, 2000
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So THAT'S who got my cousin, my sister, and her best friend pregnant. He doesn't have to worry about the girlfriend blowing up his cars, I keep extra nitro-glycerine in the shed out back.
 

jdini76

Platinum Member
Mar 16, 2001
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What I want to know is, at 18, how the fvck did he get two cars a motorcycle and a house?
 

BooGiMaN

Diamond Member
Jul 5, 2001
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sounds like a jerry spring episode...

actually what i would do is since the cousin and the best freind seem to be taking it so well all four of them should move in together and help each other out financially and with taking care of the kids...after all if your goign to have a dysfunctional family...go all the way dammit!
 

PanzerIV

Diamond Member
Dec 19, 2002
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Originally posted by: jdini76
What I want to know is, at 18, how the fvck did he get two cars a motorcycle and a house?

Same thing I was thinking but the house is probably a rundown trailer while the cars are a Pinto and a rusty Escort. Maybe, just maybe the motorcycle actually runs and has both wheels. :D
 

jdini76

Platinum Member
Mar 16, 2001
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I could maybe see the "House" being a trailer and not want it to be burned. But would you care about a pinto if you were in prison. It has to be a pretty good ride.
 

PanzerIV

Diamond Member
Dec 19, 2002
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Originally posted by: jdini76
I could maybe see the "House" being a trailer and not want it to be burned. But would you care about a pinto if you were in prison. It has to be a pretty good ride.

On the other hand maybe his family is wealthy and that's why he's got so many toys at 18 and girls with dollar signs in their eyes.
 

jdini76

Platinum Member
Mar 16, 2001
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Originally posted by: PanzerIV
Originally posted by: jdini76
I could maybe see the "House" being a trailer and not want it to be burned. But would you care about a pinto if you were in prison. It has to be a pretty good ride.

On the other hand maybe his family is wealthy and that's why he's got so many toys at 18 and girls with dollar signs in their eyes.

yea, and the fact that his mom can afford to pay doctors bills for all three women.
 

Sex Smurf

Golden Member
Oct 13, 2004
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Originally posted by: jdini76
Originally posted by: PanzerIV
Originally posted by: jdini76
I could maybe see the "House" being a trailer and not want it to be burned. But would you care about a pinto if you were in prison. It has to be a pretty good ride.

On the other hand maybe his family is wealthy and that's why he's got so many toys at 18 and girls with dollar signs in their eyes.

yea, and the fact that his mom can afford to pay doctors bills for all three women.

mom took over the pimpin business while he was on vacation.