Would you date and marry someone with differing political or religious views?

Flyback

Golden Member
Sep 20, 2006
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Personally I wouldn't marry someone who was strongly religious. Someone who had a mild religious past, perhaps, (raised Christian like myself) but was now an agnostic atheist. It isn't an attack on religion--I just can't deal with someone who holds such alternate beliefs IMO (when that someone spends day and night with you, as soulmate or whatnot).

I find it hard to say I would marry someone with different political views, too. In my opinion it underscores who you are in a fundamental way, and your values. (Then again you can't easily put all your values into a single party. You don't always agree with all aspects of a party, politician or campaign.) I would date/marry someone who is moderate and near me on the political spectrum.
 

Stunt

Diamond Member
Jul 17, 2002
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I have no problem dating someone with different religious views; most people are religious for their own piece of mind, and usually use it in a positive way to help others.

Politically I have no issue dating someone who doesn't vote the same way i do. I would have a problem who is very politically involved and on the opposite side of the spectrum. That just creates needless arguing; luckily the vast majority of women are not interested in politics and I am perfectly fine with that. :)
 

ntdz

Diamond Member
Aug 5, 2004
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I don't care about political beliefs, sometimes it's more fun if they don't agree with your views. As far as religion goes, I wouldn't want to be with someone that is extremely religious.
 

Strk

Lifer
Nov 23, 2003
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It kind of depends entirely on the personality. Someone can be highly conservative or liberal, but not very political overall (I.e. they may always vote one way, but rarely talk about it). That is, not everyone is a political pundit -- making a living out of yammering on about politics.
 

Flyback

Golden Member
Sep 20, 2006
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Originally posted by: ntdz
I don't care about political beliefs, sometimes it's more fun if they don't agree with your views. As far as religion goes, I wouldn't want to be with someone that is extremely religious.

Yeah I can see that. I guess I shouldn't be so close-minded myself. The most important part is that you have fun together and enjoy each other's company first and foremost. With that through you can work over anything.

I don't think I could deal with someone extreme in either end of both spectrums, though. I couldn't deal with an adamant atheist just as I couldn't deal with an absolute-by-the-book Christian/Muslim/Other.
 

musicc

Member
Jul 3, 2005
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Originally posted by: Stunt
I have no problem dating someone with different religious views; most people are religious for their own piece of mind, and usually use it in a positive way to help others.

Politically I have no issue dating someone who doesn't vote the same way i do. I would have a problem who is very politically involved and on the opposite side of the spectrum. That just creates needless arguing; luckily the vast majority of women are not interested in politics and I am perfectly fine with that. :)

Same here. Why judge? If you respect others believe, then others should respect you.
 
Oct 22, 2005
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The only person I wouldn't marry is a person who tried to cram their political or religious views down my throat, but other than that I wouldn't have any problem marrying someone with different views.
 

fallensight

Senior member
Apr 12, 2006
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It depends alot on both counts. I could never be with someone who felt the need to play over everything, or start and finnish discusions with "because God said so". There is definatly more play in the political side, but I would have a hard time finding enough respect for someone who was big on the likes of George Bush, or listened to rush.
 

Siddhartha

Lifer
Oct 17, 1999
12,505
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In the past, I have avoided women who talked about god on a personal level. I will probably continue to avoid them.
 

Ferocious

Diamond Member
Feb 16, 2000
4,584
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My wife is a Christian and I am not. And we get along great.

She has little interest in politics.
 

b0mbrman

Lifer
Jun 1, 2001
29,470
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I'd prefer someone of opposing views. At least we'll always have something to talk about.

Me I am against the new law that was passed
Her I agree
Me Very well...

[40 years of awkward silence ensues]
 

Jeff7

Lifer
Jan 4, 2001
41,596
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My views tend to be rather blasphemous; I'd prefer someone agnostic or atheist. For instance, I wouldn't want my SO to constantly hint that I'm going to Hell unless I convert. I don't believe that Hell exists, okay? That sort of thing could drive me nuts, just as I could do the same in return - "Oh look, one person survived a plane crash that killed 212 other people. He says, 'God was on his side.' I guess God hated everyone else on the plane. Or maybe he was nice to them by calling them back to Heaven, and he really hated the guy who survived." I just don't know that it'd work out.

Political, I guess it depends too. If someone's a die-hard supporter of their cause, I don't think I'd like it, either liberal or conservative. I might count as a moderate, because I have some liberal and some conservative views. I like a free market economy, to a point. But I also favor some social programs, with measures in place to curb abuse. I also support personal responsibility and accountability.
Supporting an issue just because your political party says you should isn't the right reason. Support or oppose things based on their own merits, not because of what you're told what position to fall in line with.
 

GroundedSailor

Platinum Member
Feb 18, 2001
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My wife (2nd marriage for both of us) is quite religious in a very gentle and open manner. I have moved away from organized religion although I don't deny the existence of God or some supreme being. to whom I am accountable. She comes from a different religion from what I grew up in. We get along just fine and religion is a non issue between us.

She has little interest in politics.


 

Dissipate

Diamond Member
Jan 17, 2004
6,815
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Originally posted by: ntdz
I don't care about political beliefs, sometimes it's more fun if they don't agree with your views. As far as religion goes, I wouldn't want to be with someone that is extremely religious.


HuH? How do you cope with all of the religious fundamentalists in your beloved GOP?
 

Martin

Lifer
Jan 15, 2000
29,178
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Don't care about politics, but religion would depend on how religious she is - anything more than being a liberal christian (for example) would be a big problem.
 

2Xtreme21

Diamond Member
Jun 13, 2004
7,044
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Rarely are your average, everyday people as vocal about politics as we are at P&N. So as long as I'm not going to be marrying ProfJohn, I don't think it'll matter.
 

magomago

Lifer
Sep 28, 2002
10,973
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As far as political views, I wouldn't care too much. The only that will get to me is if they are gung ho on wars or something, or have the view that the USA is the absolute best country EVAR and everyone else's lives take second fiddle to American ones...then there might be a personality disconnect that I couldn't break through right there that I think would affect a person's character.

As far as religion...I care quite a bit. The "label" of a religion is absolutely useless IMO. Being Muslim means nothing unless you practice what you preach - same goes for Christians or any other followers of a religion (ALLLLTHOUGH I think I would make an exception for Scientology ;) I prefer not to spend so much money on a scamm...errr cult...err religion ;)). I've also met MANY people who carried ALL the good traits of religion but were not necessarily into organized religion themselves or particularly religious. I've also met people who were much more spiritual rather than religious in a dogmatic sense...and it made me think that God will know what is really in our hearts as he ultimately judges us...thus one who MIGHT have picked the "right" religion but cares little to none should clearly should not be given an advantage over someone who actually cares about God and wanted to pursue God but ended up picking a "wrong" religion. If God is supposed to be about Justice, then there is no reason for God to ultimately shun those who actually interested in him and tried to learn more about his magnificence.

Basically, I would look for the embodiment of a good Muslim. They don't have to be Muslim and I realllly wouldn't care because there was a point in my life where I discovered a lot of guilded behavior among people I knew and it made me realize a label means nothing. Christian, Non Religious, Atheist...its all fine. So I guess -- I'm interested in someone who finds God interesting, and chooses to learn or pursue more about it through any facet possible.
Of course the kicker is that if we had kids I'd want them to be raised as Muslims~ they can make their decisions later in life, but I would at least want to educate them about Islam because I would want to make sure that even if they weren't Muslim they'd call out the B.S. on 90% of this current trend where people bash Islam based on erroneous facts.

As for dating...I know for many people dating is entirely fine, but marriage is a massively different issue. To me, I'd rather date to marry so I'm not too interested in casual dating...


I wouldn't want someone to share my views exact though...I'm interested in debate, and talking and learning about other ideas and cultures (Well so as long as I don't need to drink or eat pork ;) ) and to find a "Yes Man" (or should I say "Yes Woman" ;)) would be a little boring
 

nageov3t

Lifer
Feb 18, 2004
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I dated someone who was really super pro-life (I'm pro-death). we just had an unspoken agreement not to discuss it.