Work posers - describe the one at your job

[TomC25]

We have this lady in Helpdesk, make that the head of helpdesk. We have an application that helps salespeople and it hold information for customers and prospects. Each user has a set of filters so they they only see information they are supposed to see. One filter is called "AllCustomers" and she asked me if it would return prospects in the results.

o.........k

A filter for customers?


She cannot write a sentance at all. We have an FAQ section for this application, and she is responsible for new entries. She sent me her list of new entries for review as I am on the implementation group. I could barely understand her answers and I even know the system. I had to rewrite them all.

freakin job poser

 

[Jzero]

We have this one dude who sits there and posts on ATOT all day long..
Wait a minute.....THATS ME!

 

[pyonir]

<< We have this one dude who sits there and posts on ATOT all day long..
Wait a minute.....THATS ME! >>


LOL we have one of those guys!?! oh wait...that is ME too!

 

[Russ]

We have one guy here that does nothing but surf the web and post at BBSs all day.

Russ, NCNE

 

[Azraele]

There's one in every workplace it seems. *sigh* The one at mine is months behind. So far she has cost the company hundreds if not thousands of dollars.

 

[blakeatwork]

<< We have this one dude who sits there and posts on ATOT all day long.. >>



LOL.... same here unfortunately.... I'm a contract accounting guy, and the assignments I get are generally pretty slow...

 

[TomC25]

<< We have one guy here that does nothing but surf the web and post at BBSs all day.

Russ, NCNE >>



That's fine as long as the person does their job and is not a moron.

All work and no play...

 

[Vegito]

we got one of em too, and he does it in the bathroom with his ipaq...

 

[fatalbert]

me

 

[Maetryx]

You might recall my thread "Freaky Weird Things at Work today..." where an employee turned out to be a total imposter. She had faked her resume, listed a mail order degree as her education, and then created a totally fictitious proposal to work on (worth millions if we won the contract, but impossible since she invented the whole thing). She was a total sympathy sponge too, faking numerous injuries and maladies (minor out-patient brain surgery being the most outrageous).

She rode the proposal gravy train for a couple months. It was the justifier or her existence at the company. She used recent deaths in the newspaper to her advantage too. She would say that the people who died in the small airplane crash were part of the organization we were courting. So now the big proposal meeting has been postponed another 5 months.

If finally came apart on her when her story about out-patient brain surgery was so stupid that the company started investigating her background. None of her information withstood even a moment of scrutiny. The organization for which she was perpetually preparing a proposal had never heard of the employee, nor did they have any idea what she was talking about. The way she described their proposal procedure was absolutely alien to that organization.

It was a pretty spectacular self destruction.

 

[Tauren]

We have a couple. We have competitive promotions where I work and we have 2 guys who can't pass the test part of the promotion. They are both older have more years and I am already a level above them. In a couple months I will be their boss. Just wait till I get my hands on them!

 

[kranky]

It's going to be tough to beat Maetryx's story, that was an all-time classic.

But one time there was a sales guy where I was working who was kind of a junior version of Maetryx's example. I was in Customer Service and he tells me one day that a truckload of stuff was coming in from a new client and we had to process it. Normally when we got a new client, getting about 100 pounds of stuff would have been big. By his explanation this would be about 1,000 times the normal "big customer" initial shipment.

I was freaking out about how in the world we could even get that amount of stuff unloaded from the truck - let alone do all the paperwork! But there was delay after delay and excuse after excuse until I realized it was all BS.

Shortly after that a co-worker and I took a day off together and before lunch we decided to stop at a downtown arcade to play some pinball. Lo and behold, there's Mr. Sales Guy at one of the machines. He is shocked to see us and mumbles something about only being in there to kill some time before the next appointment a block away "because people don't like when I show up early". Just from the way he said it we knew he was outright lying and wasn't even working.

Somehow word got out and he only lasted a couple more months before leaving.

 

[Russ]

<< << We have one guy here that does nothing but surf the web and post at BBSs all day.

Russ, NCNE >>

That's fine as long as the person does their job and is not a moron.

All work and no play... >>



I don't think he's a moron, but he doesn't seem to do much work.

Russ, NCNE

 

[pyonir]

<<

<< << We have one guy here that does nothing but surf the web and post at BBSs all day.

Russ, NCNE >>

That's fine as long as the person does their job and is not a moron.

All work and no play... >>



I don't think he's a moron, but he doesn't seem to do much work.

Russ, NCNE >>


well Russ, maybe you should just get to work then huh?!

 

[UNCjigga]

LOL, there's this one idiot who I taught how to make divx movies...and he put his Office Space DVD into divx and put it on his work laptop and today he just kept watching the DVD version and the divx version (he's like 'checking for image quality'!!!!)