Which is better for keeping a marriage "fresh"? Romance or humor?

[StormRider]

I get depressed when I read threads about how a marriage falls apart and the guy was totally clueless that something was wrong. Some of the guys blame themselves for taking the wife for granted and not letting her know that he loves her and still finds her attractive.

But how does a guy do this? Which type of things is better in keeping a marriage fresh?

Romantic things like rose petals on the pillow and poetry?

Or humorous things like occassionally slapping your wife on the a$$ and saying, "Hi toots! Nice a$$. Whoa! Have you been working out?"

Which technique is better?

 

[dug777]

a big fat d0ng

A bit of both i guess really...

 

[SynthDude2001]

Originally posted by: dug777
a big fat d0ng

fifteen inches of black rubber :Q

 

[yoda291]

umm, I'd say the best thing is fun. Every relationship ends when someone stops enjoying the company of the other person. If a couple is having fun being romantic, then they should be romantic. If two people have fun bantering with each other, then that's the kicker. If they have fun playing practical jokes on each other or doing extreme sports or playing board games, or putting together jigsaw puzzles, then it's not rocket science to figure out what "technique" works.

 

[Mrvile]

Originally posted by: yoda291
umm, I'd say the best thing is fun. Every relationship ends when someone stops enjoying the company of the other person. If a couple is having fun being romantic, then they should be romantic. If two people have fun bantering with each other, then that's the kicker. If they have fun playing practical jokes on each other or doing extreme sports or playing board games, or putting together jigsaw puzzles, then it's not rocket science to figure out what "technique" works.

Agreed. Can't let things get old.

 

[her209]

Having an open marraige.

 

[laurenlex]

Originally posted by: yoda291
umm, I'd say the best thing is fun. Every relationship ends when someone stops enjoying the company of the other person. If a couple is having fun being romantic, then they should be romantic. If two people have fun bantering with each other, then that's the kicker. If they have fun playing practical jokes on each other or doing extreme sports or playing board games, or putting together jigsaw puzzles, then it's not rocket science to figure out what "technique" works.

Brilliant! /thread

 

[Rudee]

My gf and I have been together for a long time, we're not married though. But yeah, a sense of humor goes a heck of a long way in a relationship. Even when my gf and I argue, one of us will make some comment, gesture, facial expression to lighten the mood and things quickly get better again.

 

[MaxDepth]

baby oil and a Twister mat.

 

[amol]

New mistress every 4 months?

 

[dderidex]

Originally posted by: yoda291
umm, I'd say the best thing is fun. Every relationship ends when someone stops enjoying the company of the other person. If a couple is having fun being romantic, then they should be romantic. If two people have fun bantering with each other, then that's the kicker. If they have fun playing practical jokes on each other or doing extreme sports or playing board games, or putting together jigsaw puzzles, then it's not rocket science to figure out what "technique" works.

The alternative, of course, to having 'fun' is to simply never see each other. Working a regular 9-to-5 when your SO works retail (primarily pulling after 5 hours, or weekend hours), works great!

(No, really - a lot can be managed when you only see each other a few hours a week. MUCH easier to keep things new and fun that way.)

 

[EmperorIQ]

Yup, you'll need both, they are both valuable and good. AND saying the same jokes, or doing the same thing every day isnt humorous and romantic, you gotta switch it up on her, keep her on her toes!

 

[Landroval]

Listening to her when she has something to say, even if you think it sounds silly.

 

[spherrod]

Originally posted by: yoda291
umm, I'd say the best thing is fun. Every relationship ends when someone stops enjoying the company of the other person. If a couple is having fun being romantic, then they should be romantic. If two people have fun bantering with each other, then that's the kicker. If they have fun playing practical jokes on each other or doing extreme sports or playing board games, or putting together jigsaw puzzles, then it's not rocket science to figure out what "technique" works.

one of the best posts I've ever read

 

[Fullmetal Chocobo]

How were things when you first started out during the honeymoon stage? Just last night, 10 minutes before I had to go to work, I lay my wife down and kissed her, and just kept kissing her. After two minutes, I stepped back, and she was just amazed. Gave me a little present before work too! *eg* And most importantly, ASK HER!!!
Tas.

PS--Good post yoda291...

 

[iwantanewcomputer]

keeping things fun...everyone gets bored of even really romantic things. You need to be able to like spending time together, regardless of what you're doing.

 

[iamme]

Originally posted by: yoda291
umm, I'd say the best thing is fun. Every relationship ends when someone stops enjoying the company of the other person. If a couple is having fun being romantic, then they should be romantic. If two people have fun bantering with each other, then that's the kicker. If they have fun playing practical jokes on each other or doing extreme sports or playing board games, or putting together jigsaw puzzles, then it's not rocket science to figure out what "technique" works.

just to play devil's advocate, if it marriage were just a matter of continuous fun and enjoying each other's company, why are so many marriages falling apart?

it just seems like a oversimplification. if it were that simple, wouldn't it be easier to keep marriages together?

(not that i disagree with you)

 

[biostud]

post pictures of her on ATOT

having fun >= Romance

 

[Lola]

Originally posted by: StormRider
I get depressed when I read threads about how a marriage falls apart and the guy was totally clueless that something was wrong. Some of the guys blame themselves for taking the wife for granted and not letting her know that he loves her and still finds her attractive.

But how does a guy do this? Which type of things is better in keeping a marriage fresh?

Romantic things like rose petals on the pillow and poetry?

Or humorous things like occassionally slapping your wife on the a$$ and saying, "Hi toots! Nice a$$. Whoa! Have you been working out?"

Which technique is better?

Both. You need both to keep any "special" relationship storng and alive. The newness fades quickly and you are left to see the true person in the best and worst aspects. The romance should always be evident whether a couple is together for 30 days or 50 years, it will just appear differently. I do not equate sex with romance as they *CAN* be different from each other.

Romance is thinking about her when you go to the store and buy her her favorite cereal without her having to ask. Romance is writing a little note to him and putting it in his briefcase to have him find at work to brighten his day. Its the little things that add up and make the relationship strong. My grandfather still spoke of my late gramother as sexy and beautiful even at the ripe age of 77. When she passed, he told his kids what a good lookin lady she always was. They were married 55 years.

Humor should never leave. You should always find time to laugh together at each other with each other. Life together should be fun...some of the time anyways. It is wonderful if you find a partner with a different sense of humor than you as you both can never expect the next moment. You should never take life too seriously, or you'll never get out of it alive.

Each relationship is different, some need more of one than the other, but if you find a mix of the two that work, keep at it and keep things fresh.

 

[Alex]

Originally posted by: laurenlex

Originally posted by: yoda291
umm, I'd say the best thing is fun. Every relationship ends when someone stops enjoying the company of the other person. If a couple is having fun being romantic, then they should be romantic. If two people have fun bantering with each other, then that's the kicker. If they have fun playing practical jokes on each other or doing extreme sports or playing board games, or putting together jigsaw puzzles, then it's not rocket science to figure out what "technique" works.

Brilliant! /thread

word second that!

also its fun to try new things from time to time

 

[iamme]

maybe i'm being cynical, but i think that the best way to stay together is just adhering to the commitment you've made to each other.

marriages go through highs and lows. unless there's something very serious like infidelity, most "problems" are short-term.

i just think that more marriages would "work" if people would just say, "things suck now, but i made a commitment to him/her and i'm going to stick through it". humor and romance are great and needed....but the cynic in me says that they are overrated ingredients of a successful marriage. sure, those are great ways to express your love for one another. however, i think that people would make marriages work just by sticking with it through tough times.

 

[marvdmartian]

How about humorous romance???

:laugh:

 

[meltdown75]

what keeps a marriage fresh?

a whole lotta "yes dear" with a side of "right away honey".

 

[moshquerade]

Originally posted by: StormRider
I get depressed when I read threads about how a marriage falls apart and the guy was totally clueless that something was wrong. Some of the guys blame themselves for taking the wife for granted and not letting her know that he loves her and still finds her attractive.

But how does a guy do this? Which type of things is better in keeping a marriage fresh?

Romantic things like rose petals on the pillow and poetry?

Or humorous things like occassionally slapping your wife on the a$$ and saying, "Hi toots! Nice a$$. Whoa! Have you been working out?"

Which technique is better?

why one or the other? it's definitely both.

i would also say you have to keep re-inventing or else boredom will set in.