I guess that's why you're the_good_guy.
BoberFett,
Something to try. Give your wife two quarters, and tell her to keep them until a set date. (Let's say Sunday) And to meet you at the set time and date in the bedroom with the quarters.
You cannot tell her why at all.
When the day comes, she is to get on all fours, you put the quarters on the back of her hands, and her duty is not to have them fall off, and your duty is to knock them off. (Of course not cheating by hitting your hands. I think you know what I mean.

)
Months is bad.
