When does "spanking" a child become abuse.

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SparkyJJO

SparkyJJO

Lifer
May 16, 2002
13,357
7
81
Originally posted by: Imp
Anything but barehand and anywhere but to the hand or ass.

Even then, I'm not really for it. Ya, the child fears it now, but it feels more like taking your own agression out on the kid. To each their own though.
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So when I was little and did something really bad and my dad used the belt he was abusing me?

Disagree. Hurt then, but learned the lesson, and I do believe I'm better off. Too many kids these days are not punished for their actions, or the punishment is so mild that it really has no effect.
 
I

ICRS

Banned
Apr 20, 2008
1,328
0
0
Originally posted by: Squisher
Back in the stone ages teachers had paddles that looked like Cricket Bats with holes drilled in them to make them less wind resistant and they were usually emblazoned with witty names like, "The Board of Education."

I got my only swat in sixth grade when some of my friends and I flew about 400 paper airplanes out of the third story window of the school when we had a sub and she was out of the room half the day.

<---51 yrs. old


My parents once caught me stealing rubber bands out of my sister's house and I got a belt (the only time) I was maybe 8 or 9.

I actually think you could draw blood with a coat hanger or a fly swatter and don't think a broom or a piece of PVC would even bruise a kid.

I don't know, I never hit my kids with any thing more than my hand on there bare ass.
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Noo I assure you brooms bruise, and it hurts.
 
W

wwswimming

Banned
Jan 21, 2006
3,695
1
0
lifting a child off the ground by their ears.

a friend of mine, her husband did that. she reported it to some
child protective agency after being urged by various friends
about 20 times. her husband's a doctor in the Midwest.

i saw a guy do this to his kids at KFC. i was dumbfounded when
i first saw it, then walked over to his table and yelled at him for
a few minutes. with his kids and about 50 people watching.
 
KentState

KentState

Diamond Member
Oct 19, 2001
8,397
393
126
The entire idea behind spanking is to associate pain with a bad action. A spanking to the backside should be sufficient and beyond that is overkill. If anything more is used, I feel that the parent isn't in control of their frustrations.
 
Cogman

Cogman

Lifer
Sep 19, 2000
10,286
147
106
Originally posted by: KentState
The entire idea behind spanking is to associate pain with a bad action. A spanking to the backside should be sufficient and beyond that is overkill. If anything more is used, I feel that the parent isn't in control of their frustrations.
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Agreed, I might add that it should be used as a last resort as well. Emotionally abuse the kid first... umm, I mean...

I think a time out, restriction from a favorite game or activity, ect.. are usually better ways to handle situations. Basically the lesson to be taught is "There is a consequence for your actions, you don't choose consequences, only your actions." When kids learn that doing bad things brings bad consequences they'll be better off in life. Of course the fear is they might learn that getting caught doing bad things will bring bad consequences but not being caught means you get to enjoy the best of both worlds.

By the age of 11 kids are starting to get old enough where physical punishment teaches no lesson.
 
Bignate603

Bignate603

Lifer
Sep 5, 2000
13,897
1
0
Originally posted by: xSauronx
Originally posted by: mugs
Who the hell beats their kids with a PVC pipe? :confused:
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plumbers?
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Mario beats his children?


I have no problem with spanking, but it should be to done in moderation. Honestly, if done right you should have to spank very little. The pain and humiliation of it should give you enough to just threaten them with it so you don't have to do it that often.

I was given a good spanking once after I was an age that I could remember, never needed it again.
 
S

SlitheryDee

The only ones I'd disagree with are 2 and 9. The water bucket thing should be replaced with some undesirable but necessary task, whitewashing the fence or something like that. Kicking and stomping seems too much like anger out of control. One thing a punishment should never be is a way for the punisher to vent anger.

I don't know why people have such an aversion to corporal punishment. Human beings have always used pain as a way to know not to do certain things. Why not use this wonderfully effective, built in tendency to avoid pain as the final lesson when words fail? It should be used on adults too. I'll bet a short stay in prison (no more than a few weeks) followed by a vicious public flogging right before release would discourage a lot of minor crimes.
 
Sumguy

Sumguy

Golden Member
Jun 2, 2007
1,409
0
0
My dad used to whip me and my siblings with a really thick leather belt he had. We usually knew we fucked up when he said "Eh? Eh? What did you do/say? Come 'ere! Tell me what you just said/did." /grab and fold belt

If you could come up with a good explanation you could escape punishment, but we were like 8 years old and usually there was no good explanation, just felt like doing it. Never hit anywhere but the ass, though. I think the last age any of us did anything deserving of a good old fashioned ass whooping was at 10. By that age we guided ourselves pretty well and didn't need that much supervision.

That said, I don't see anything wrong with physical punishment, as long as it is not excessive and the child did something deserving of such a response. I've seen a woman straight up backhand her kid in the face and hit him again for crying. Quite a few people stepped in, because they looked pretty hard.
 
W

Whisper

Diamond Member
Feb 25, 2000
5,394
2
81
Originally posted by: Imp
Anything but barehand and anywhere but to the hand or ass.

Even then, I'm not really for it. Ya, the child fears it now, but it feels more like taking your own agression out on the kid. To each their own though.
Click to expand...

This is about what I'd say as well. In general, spanking--as far as I know--isn't any more effective than something along the lines of time out, and (IMO) should be reserved for dangerous situations in which the child needs strong and immediate feedback on his or her behavior (e.g., if attempting to run across a street without looking)
 
S

spidey07

No Lifer
Aug 4, 2000
65,469
5
76
9 is over the line, 8 is borderline. If used properly 8 is just fine if the kid did something really bad. If you instill the concept of "consequences to your decisions and actions, sometimes really bad consequences" they will have life figured out before they reach 26.
 
L

legoman666

Diamond Member
Dec 18, 2003
3,628
1
0
I don't think I was ever hit as a child, but my father used to threaten us with (like raise his hand to smack us or something). The most typical punishment was taking away something we liked doing (like playing on the computer). Other less serious punishments were sitting in the corner or behind the couch and extra chores.
 
BassBomb

BassBomb

Diamond Member
Nov 25, 2005
8,390
1
81
I used to get 1 and 3, which I will give to my kids too. Also getting hit by a small slipper or shoe was also common for me
 
Gothgar

Gothgar

Lifer
Sep 1, 2004
13,429
1
0
Look at all these fucking pussies in this thread, wtf.

This is what is wrong with America.

ADD and ADHD didn't exist when you were allowed to spank your child. Now you gotta worry about some fuck head hippy coming up to you in KFC and yell at you in front of everyone, like it is their damn business how you raise your child.



The worst beating I ever got was with a hockey stick... I also got the belt multiple time. Do I hate my parents or think I was abused? Hell no, I was a little nasty fuck who deserved it (maybe not the hockey stick.)
 
S

seemingly random

Diamond Member
Oct 10, 2007
5,277
0
0
Originally posted by: KentState
The entire idea behind spanking is to associate pain with a bad action. A spanking to the backside should be sufficient and beyond that is overkill. If anything more is used, I feel that the parent isn't in control of their frustrations.
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Exactly.

---

An old girlfriend's stepdad used to make her go down the hall and get a belt out of his closet so the lazy ass could beat her with it. Seems more like mental torture than a behavioral adjustment.
 
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