What's your horoscope for today?

[DainBramaged]

http://www.theonion.com/content/node/50647

Leo July 23 - August 22

With the exception of perhaps the stars, nobody would have ever guessed you'd end up a pedophile? much less a pediatrician

 

[jadinolf]

Originally posted by: DainBramaged
http://www.theonion.com/content/node/50647

Leo July 23 - August 22

With the exception of perhaps the stars, nobody would have ever guessed you'd end up a pedophile? much less a pediatrician

Or a pedicure?

 

[Ika]

Scorpio October 24 - November 21

Take heart in knowing that, someday, you'll inspire a whole new generation to pursue their dreams, secure in the knowledge that they couldn't possibly do any worse than you.

 

[imported_LoKe]

Scorpio October 24 - November 21

Take heart in knowing that, someday, you'll inspire a whole new generation to pursue their dreams, secure in the knowledge that they couldn't possibly do any worse than you.

 

[Darthvoy]

Gemini May 21 - June 21

After years of putting up an emotional wall to keep loved ones from getting too close, you'll realize the error of your ways this Thursday and purchase three tons of brick and cement.

 

[Dacalo]

Originally posted by: Aflac
Scorpio October 24 - November 21

Take heart in knowing that, someday, you'll inspire a whole new generation to pursue their dreams, secure in the knowledge that they couldn't possibly do any worse than you.

EDIT: Wow, three scorpios already, we rox0r!

 

[OdiN]

I prefer BBSpot:

Please do not read this horoscope if you have a history of liver problems, trouble urinating or erectile dysfunction.


Luckily, I haven't had any of that so I'm okay.

 

[Ika]

Originally posted by: OdiN
I prefer BBSpot:

Please do not read this horoscope if you have a history of liver problems, trouble urinating or erectile dysfunction.


Luckily, I haven't had any of that so I'm okay.

hahaha A+

parody horoscopes are the best.

 

[overst33r]

Sagittarius November 22 - December 21

Panicked and fearing no other existing option, you will knock your girlfriend down only one month after knocking her up.