What's the worst resume you've ever seen?

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bonkers325

Lifer
Mar 9, 2000
13,076
1
0
Going through some resumes that are being forwarded to me...

um3yoDR.png


Must be a native OT'er. He's HIRED! :D

edit: I just realized this guy's resume is actually 5 pages long... the last 4 pages are just blank sheets with a border.
 
Last edited:
KeithTalent

KeithTalent

Elite Member | Administrator | No Lifer
Administrator
Nov 30, 2005
50,231
118
116
I once received a 47 page resume for a low-level accounting job. Yeah...no.

KT
 
Baked

Baked

Lifer
Dec 28, 2004
36,052
17
81
"Hey you guys still hiring? Call me, I'm available to work asap."
 
Yamada

Yamada

Member
May 8, 2013
83
0
0
"I has experience in teaching and instruction, was available for hiring."

The guy's resume said he was a graduate from IUPUI in Indianapolis.
 
DrPizza

DrPizza

Administrator Elite Member Goat Whisperer
Mar 5, 2001
49,601
167
111
www.slatebrookfarm.com
Position desired:
"eny"

His address was in 4 locations; spelled differently each time. It went straight into the trash. "we never received it."
 
P

pmv

Lifer
May 30, 2008
15,142
10,043
136
Maybe they should have gotten this guy to help?

http://www.gumtree.com/p/jobs/cv-wr...-job-or-interview-your-looking-for/1017357867

CV Writing Service from CV KNOWHOW - £75.00 + FREE Covering Letter

Not getting that job or interview your looking for... It all starts with your CV

- On average 33 other applicants apply to the same jobs as you are.
- On average a recruiter or HR Manager look at each CV for less than 35 seconds.

Your CV have to stand out, when you use our service you also get 12 years understanding of recruitment not just creative writers.

Have a look at at CV KNOWHOW and see if we can help you -
Click to expand...
On reflection - could this be a phishing thing? Not a very good bait if so.
 
Fritzo

Fritzo

Lifer
Jan 3, 2001
41,920
2,162
126
I had someone drop off a resume to me hand written with a black Sharpie. I just imagine his resume bled through and is permanently engrained on a kitchen table somewhere.
 
M

MixMasterTang

Diamond Member
Jul 23, 2001
3,167
176
106
Someone applied for a position at the last company I worked for and his email listed on the top of his resume in his contact info was "spankenstein@hotmail.com".

edit: And no, his name had nothing to do with the email address.
 
SheHateMe

SheHateMe

Diamond Member
Jul 21, 2012
7,251
20
81
Ok, but have you ever seen a resume that was terrible and you wanted to give the person a shot anyway?
 
KeithTalent

KeithTalent

Elite Member | Administrator | No Lifer
Administrator
Nov 30, 2005
50,231
118
116
rivan said:
LOL. Full of what?
Click to expand...

Part of it was terrible formatting, so only a few lines per page, but also had extensive diatribes on what he had accomplished out in the world. I honestly only went through a few pages of it, then put it in the trash.

KT
 
KB

KB

Diamond Member
Nov 8, 1999
5,406
389
126
The bad grammar ones I don't typically remember, but I do remember one in which the guy mentioned every action word he could. He used these phrases and other ones interspersed throughout the work history.

"Facilitated the organizational hierarchy"
"Automated the implementation process"
 
B

bonkers325

Lifer
Mar 9, 2000
13,076
1
0
KB said:
The bad grammar ones I don't typically remember, but I do remember one in which the guy mentioned every action word he could. He used these phrases and other ones interspersed throughout the work history.

"Facilitated the organizational hierarchy"
"Automated the implementation process"
Click to expand...

I too, love shifting paradigms and facilitating synergies.
 
silverpig

silverpig

Lifer
Jul 29, 2001
27,703
12
81
When I was in high school I worked in a coffee shop and got a few gems.

One lady hand-wrote hers on lined paper, and just crossed out her mistakes and re-wrote them. She then photocopied this version, noticed a few more mistakes, and made additional changes in pen on the photocopy by scribbling and re-writing. Her job for the past 5 years had been "trying to write a book"
 
JulesMaximus

JulesMaximus

No Lifer
Jul 3, 2003
74,590
986
126
I once had someone submit a resume handwritten on notebook paper.

I threw it right in the trash.
 
waggy

waggy

No Lifer
Dec 14, 2000
68,143
10
81
where is the link to to the video resume of the kid making wild claims? heh

I have seen some bad ones. wish i would have scanned some they were funny. A buddy of mine linked me one where a guy listed being WoW guild leader/raid leader. he thought i would get a kick out of it.
 
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