• We’re currently investigating an issue related to the forum theme and styling that is impacting page layout and visual formatting. The problem has been identified, and we are actively working on a resolution. There is no impact to user data or functionality, this is strictly a front-end display issue. We’ll post an update once the fix has been deployed. Thanks for your patience while we get this sorted.

What to title a cake for b*tches at work?

B

bmacd

Lifer
I work with a handful of b*tches that are leaving tomorrow for Peoria, Illinois. They (about 6 of them) collectively brought in food for just themselves. Normally, we all share food as a store. They seem to have been told they are the elitists around the store. Me and another girl decided we were going to get a cake and write something to the extent of "Good Riddance" or something like that. What should we write? There is serious hatred towards these women.

-=bmacd=-
 
i think its riddance, you know, so they don't laugh at you and revel in superiority
 
I'm thinking "Don't let the door hit you in the ass on the way out" in nice cursive letters. A little wordy? maybe, but I guarantee it'll have the desired effect 😀
 
Better yet, write something nice on the cake but on the bottom (underneath the cake) write the ingredients of the cake.
You can make it up or use some really fattening stuff for real. I think it would be priceless to see their face after they eat the cake 🙂
 
A little long but...

You make great coffee. I doubt a MAN could have made it better.
 
Be careful or they'll have you disciplined for harassment.

I'd either skip it or go with some over-sweet false sentiment like
"Enjoy your new life opportunity!"
"Have a super fun time in Peoria!"
"It just won't be the same here without you!"

..or something else with exclamation points, smileys, and/or hearts.
 
get a dark chocolate cake, with dark frosting and write on it in "dark fudge" "you thought that brown stuff was frosting on that cake..."

or

"Be gone you wretched hags!"
 
Print out on a piece of paper "To hell you b*tches!" in big red or black bold letters...

And then place the cake on top of it... (make sure add a sheet of some of that non stick paper on top too so the ink doesn't smear with the cake)

Then on the cake, with icing write "Have a safe trip!"
 
Instead of a nasty message on the cake, get a banner that says "Peoria Gang's Go Away Party" to hang up by the cake.

If someone questions it, just say it was supposed to read Going Away, but the person at the store where you got the banner wrote it down wrong.

You get all of the insult, with none of the backlash.
 
Originally posted by: kranky
You get all of the insult, with none of the backlash.
Click to expand...
This is the mantra you should be chanting.
The BEST insults are the ones where the targets either have NO idea how badly they have been ripped, or who KNOW how badly they have been ripped, but can't do anything but grin about it. 😀
 
Or have this put on the cake:

Farewell To Such
Unsurpassed
Colleagues!
Know That
You Made
Our Days
Utterly Fantastic!
 
Heh, get a cake and leave it in the fridge. The cake should say:

"WELCOME NEW DEPARTMENT XXYYZZ EMPLOYEES!"

When they ask, and they will, just relay to them that a WEEK AGO, their replacements were hired and they are all reporting for work the very first day that they are all gone. Ensure the others are in on it. The feeling that not only are you NOT irreplaceable, but have been replaced BEFORE YOU EVEN LEFT is sure to make the PMS for the next year, at least. Mwuahahahahahah!
 
Originally posted by: TallGeese
Or have this put on the cake:

Farewell To Such
Unsurpassed
Colleagues!
Know That
You Made
Our Days
Utterly Fantastic!
Click to expand...


...or that. *more* Mwuahahahahahahahah!
 
Go watch "National Lampoon's Van Wilder" and you'll have to stop thinking of ideas.

Make sure you get a well-endowed bulldog
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top