Okay, heres the issue guys. My buddy got married over 1.5 years ago. Before they had even reached their 1 year anniversary he finds out that she was cheating on him. Emails were found that were certainly a smoking gun showing at the very least inappropriate behavior with other men. Yeah, bad situation for sure.
His house is in his name. She has a size-able amount of debt from before they were married. He has stated that he didn't cosign or consolidate any of her debt under his name.
Now, all of you will come on here and say "Get a divorce...Get a Lawyer", etc, etc. You are preaching to the choir here. Shes not paying off ANY of her debt...in fact shes spending all of the current money she is making and not paying off any of her old loans.
Shes been dating this other guy, and has talked about marrying him since the start. Whatever... Anyway, the problem is that my neither my friend or his wife want to go get the papers done. This is where I need help. I know why he doesn't want to sign, (because in his delusional mind he thinks things can be worked out.) I just don't see what her reasoning for not having the papers done are. Maybe its the cost of the filing, maybe its because she doesn't want it to look like she gave up on the marriage. I really don't know. Even her family takes his side!
They were married under the catholic church, if that has any type of effect here. I'm just worried that if my friend doesn't initiate the filing hes going to lose his house to this girl or get tied into her debt even more so than he is. Attempts by his family and myself go unheeded. He is very stubborn. I've known the kid my whole life, and as bad as this situation is I don't want to see it getting that much worse for him.
So I ask anyone on Anandtech who has dealt with a short term divorce, or might have some knowledge that pertains to this thread if they can give me any info that might give me some fire to light under his ass to not procrastinate until hes dug his own grave. I just wnat to hear what the side effects could be if he lets this carry on and on.
A little more info:
We are from Michigan
She made more money than him when she started this ordeal, but a couple months ago he switched jobs and started making considerably more money. If he waits can she get alimony off of him even though they have been in the gutter for this long?
His house is in his name. She has a size-able amount of debt from before they were married. He has stated that he didn't cosign or consolidate any of her debt under his name.
Now, all of you will come on here and say "Get a divorce...Get a Lawyer", etc, etc. You are preaching to the choir here. Shes not paying off ANY of her debt...in fact shes spending all of the current money she is making and not paying off any of her old loans.
Shes been dating this other guy, and has talked about marrying him since the start. Whatever... Anyway, the problem is that my neither my friend or his wife want to go get the papers done. This is where I need help. I know why he doesn't want to sign, (because in his delusional mind he thinks things can be worked out.) I just don't see what her reasoning for not having the papers done are. Maybe its the cost of the filing, maybe its because she doesn't want it to look like she gave up on the marriage. I really don't know. Even her family takes his side!
They were married under the catholic church, if that has any type of effect here. I'm just worried that if my friend doesn't initiate the filing hes going to lose his house to this girl or get tied into her debt even more so than he is. Attempts by his family and myself go unheeded. He is very stubborn. I've known the kid my whole life, and as bad as this situation is I don't want to see it getting that much worse for him.
So I ask anyone on Anandtech who has dealt with a short term divorce, or might have some knowledge that pertains to this thread if they can give me any info that might give me some fire to light under his ass to not procrastinate until hes dug his own grave. I just wnat to hear what the side effects could be if he lets this carry on and on.
A little more info:
We are from Michigan
She made more money than him when she started this ordeal, but a couple months ago he switched jobs and started making considerably more money. If he waits can she get alimony off of him even though they have been in the gutter for this long?
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