What is the most annoying corporate phrase?

[FrustratedUser]

The only Brainstorming I've experienced is actually more like Blamestorming, and the Seagull manager is leading it.
LOL

 

[poopaskoopa]

Originally posted by: MrMilney
Anything with the word "synergy."

Or SynerGE

 

[Kadarin]

I love this thread...

"Best of breed.."
"Take it to the next level.."
"Strategic partnering.."
anything "systems" or "solutions": We actually have a company here in San Jose that busses people around called "Destination Systems"
"interface" used as a verb: "let's interface at 10:00"
"Make this your priority.."

 

[Vic]

"... just want to make sure that everyone is on the same page... "

 

[gotsmack]

Originally posted by: nord1899
"Maximizing share holder value"

I hear that a lot from the CEO of the company I work for. Seems to be the only things that matters in the business world these days.

Screw the customers, screw the employees (well those not in upper-management), but be sure to increase the stock price.

actually, that is the sole role of management. I had that drilled into my head in just about every management and finance course I've taken.

 

[Desslok]

Some of my favorites are "Are we getting exposure on the problem" "What was the root cause" "During the downtime we may have some people movement"

 

[DnetMHZ]

Originally posted by: Astaroth33
I love this thread...

"Best of breed.."
"Take it to the next level.."
"Strategic partnering.."
anything "systems" or "solutions": We actually have a company here in San Jose that busses people around called "Destination Systems"
"interface" used as a verb: "let's interface at 10:00"
"Make this your priority.."

My old boss used the word "solution" in every damn sentence! :|

 

[Infos]

I can't believe not one person mentioned the KILLER .......





































































DOWNSIZING
:disgust::Q:|

 

[Pliablemoose]

I tend to like the new phrases that regulators have come up with like "Fraud", Obstruction of Justice", & "Accounting Irregularities"

 

[Linflas]

The renaming of personnel departments to Human Resources always bugged me. One I hear sales dweebs go on about all the time for proposals is "building a story" as if all they need to do is fabricate some nice sounding fiction to sell their services.

 

[Kung Lau]

Although I'm active duty, I'd consider us a HUGE corporation


"Mission critical"


Like all other things we're doing are for fun

 

[Infos]

Pliablemoose:
I'd rather hear

30 years with no parole possible for 29 years

 

[Tangerine]

"If you would have been doing your homework, you would have known...blah blah."
- said by my boss to another employee here right in the middle of the department...yeesh how embarassing.

 

[spidey07]

"It is imperative that we maximize our potential by shifting focus to a more synergistic supply model. By allocating human resources to home bound work units, building maintenance and expense can be negated, coupled with a resource earnings expense reduction."

In other word we're kicking you out of the office complete with pay cut. That's what I call synergy!

 

[Linflas]

Originally posted by: spidey07
"It is imperative that we maximize our potential by shifting focus to a more synergistic supply model. By allocating human resources to home bound work units, building maintenance and expense can be negated, coupled with a resource earnings expense reduction."

In other word we're kicking you out of the office complete with pay cut. That's what I call synergy!

So you get to work from home? Hmm I might consider a pay cut for that depending on the size of the cut.

 

[incallisto]

Mission Critical.

 

[slickcat]

Touch base
or the all famous drill down
such as "Let's drill down and find the root cause of this issue"

 

[Garet Jax]

My biggest beef is that businesses try to convince us that they are looking out for our interests as consumers and society. Their only goal has been to make money.

 

[Killbat]

I can't believe nobody has mentioned "dialog" yet (as in "I'd like to dialog with you about utlilizing....").
Or has that one fell out of use?

 

[DigDug]

What about "micromanage"- why not tell me that you are just going to breath down my fvkcing back?

 

[MaxDepth]

"Let's take that offline."

Boy I wanna bitch slap everyone who says that in my meetings.

 

[geno]

"For all intents and purposes", I've seen that get thrown around too much, it's way too wordy for what you need to say

actually, one idiot who worked at my company typed up an email to bitch about something and he wrote "for all intensive purposes"...just goes to show you how important these dumb buzz-phrases are

 

[JellyBaby]

My biggest beef is that businesses try to convince us that they are looking out for our interests as consumers and society. Their only goal has been to make money.

Sometimes both goals go hand-in-hand. And when you use the blanket phrase "businesses" you include the small mom-and-pop stores. They don't deserve such harsh criticism (most of them anyway). Focus your animousity to only those entities deserving it.

 

[guyver01]

Originally posted by: PSYWVic
"... just want to make sure that everyone is on the same page... "

Ugh... i hate that..... hell... most of the time we're not reading the same book! how can we be on the same page!!!

and the worst has to be...

"Lets be proactive when it comes to network outages "

WTF?? You want me to predict when there's gonna be an unforseen outage, and prevent it??? I'm freaking Dionne Warwick now?? is this the damn psychic friends network???

gimme a break.

 

[spidey07]

good networks don't have outages.

Next annoying phase.

"we have issues"

What? so go see your friggin shrink about your issues. I've got work to do, now get over to the doctor and take care of your "issues"