What does it mean when your girlfriend says to you...

[AreaCode707]

Those of you who are ridiculing her for playing mind games and being obscure- I had trouble explicating that any clearer than it appeared to me. Chances are, she thinks she's being totally clear (it makes perfect sense to me, not hard to tell what she's saying at all) and is confused by his confused reaction.

 

[Balthazar]

Originally posted by: HotChic
Yeesh, you guys are clueless. She didn't do this to pick a fight. She did this because she wants to ensure that she's still important to him, that he still WANTS to see her (even without the obligation of the established relationship). I look at that and see it from the girl's point of view - yeah, he's making the effort to visit her, but it looks like he's doing it grudgingly, or without enthusiasm. Try, quite simply, telling her in between visits how much you're looking forward to seeing her again. See if that doesn't switch stuff around. She can't tell what's in your head here, that's the problem, and she's worried that you're losing interest. Us gals know that there's no faster way to lose a guy than for him to feel like he *has* to do something, and she's trying to determine if you're at that point.

She doesn't want to make it an obligation. She wants you to look forward to seeing her as much as she looks forward to seeing you, and if she doesn't see that matching, it creates a feeling of disconnect for her. This is a really easily solved problem, just taking a few extra words in an email or phone call.

Yeah you see rather than HER being open with YOU about the way she feels YOU need to be open with HER to re-assure HER....

I love female illogic....

 

[sandorski]

Originally posted by: thawolfman

Originally posted by: HotChic
Yeesh, you guys are clueless. She didn't do this to pick a fight. She did this because she wants to ensure that she's still important to him, that he still WANTS to see her (even without the obligation of the established relationship). I look at that and see it from the girl's point of view - yeah, he's making the effort to visit her, but it looks like he's doing it grudgingly, or without enthusiasm. Try, quite simply, telling her in between visits how much you're looking forward to seeing her again. See if that doesn't switch stuff around. She can't tell what's in your head here, that's the problem, and she's worried that you're losing interest. Us gals know that there's no faster way to lose a guy than for him to feel like he *has* to do something, and she's trying to determine if you're at that point.

She doesn't want to make it an obligation. She wants you to look forward to seeing her as much as she looks forward to seeing you, and if she doesn't see that matching, it creates a feeling of disconnect for her. This is a really easily solved problem, just taking a few extra words in an email or phone call.

Well said!

Not that I have anything to add, but I hope what ^she^ said helps ya out bro!

Ditto

It takes a woman to understand a woman and Hotchic is all that! :gift:

 

[Krugger]

Originally posted by: TJN23

Originally posted by: Krugger
stopped reading after your second post. ignore most everything the guys here said, listen to the one girl that posted, and a few other people.
it's clear to me why. you said you wanted to see your boys friday, then come on sat.
she's a girl. to her she heard:
i'd rather be with my guys than you on friday, but then they all leave so i'll come see you on saturday, since i have nothing else to do.
that's why she said you dont want to it's more like you feel you have to.
it's just the games girls play. you have to play along sometimes. just go on sat. and make the most of the weekend. she'll get over it. if she can't accept that you have other friends, then that'll be a problem. if she's just gonna make you pay for the one night, then that's how girls work.

i assume you're a guy so u win the "best guy post in this thread" award...heh thanks

yea, i'm a guy. i've been in two long distance / long term relationships, so i've learned to translate what girls say into what they mean. it just comes down to whether you want to play the game or not. if it's too much or too agravating, then it's time to say something, or move on. hopefully it's just a small issue that will be resolved and you all will be fine.

Originally posted by: xirtam

stopped reading after your second post. ignore most everything the guys here said

I got to that part and ignored the rest. Hope you don't mind.

nope, don't mind at all, as long as he read it. just so you know i meant ignore everything most of the guys here said. as in the ones on the first page that didn't know what they were talking about. but it seems to have come out differently. oh well, my bad.

-Krugger