WinkOsmosis
Banned
That was an interesting trip from Austin to Houston, with my friends Michael and Janice. It took 3 hours because of traffic at all those damned lights on 290, and a mile long line of cars. It was worth it though.
I stopped at a gas station in Giddings, that small town where everyone gets tickets (I had to pee). I went in the store and used the restroom, then bought some "cheddar and bacon flavored fries". I don't even know how they can call them fries but they taste good.
Anyway, I came out and was walking toward my car, my mouth watering with anticipation of the pleasure of the "fries", when I saw hrough my windows Janice and Michael waving and pointing. I look, and on the other side of my car is a shaggy, golden retriever type dog. He looked at me, and started barking. I was so scared. In a split second I decided that running would be impossible, because dogs are fast and I have bad knees. So I ran up to my car, jumped up, and climbed onto the roof, scattering fries everywhere, while Janice was laughing her ass off. They could see me through the sunroof 🙂.
Then I threw fries at the dog, hoping he would be distracted so I could go in the door. Eventually he ran away and Janice opened the door and I dropped down. Since I left my fries on the sunroof, I had to open it to get them.. but the damn bag was half empty thanks to the damn dog.
And I thought my roof may have been dented. I'm not sure why I didn't jump onto the trunk. I guess that was too close to the dog, and I instinctively avoided that location. If I did try to jump on the trunk, I would have been running straight toward the dog though, and he probably would have lurched at me, tearing my testicles off and devouring my manhood while I bled to death 70 miles from civilization (no offense to anyone who lives in Giddings).
Thank goodness I didn't dent my roof. I did bend the sheetmetal, but it popped back up.
I stopped at a gas station in Giddings, that small town where everyone gets tickets (I had to pee). I went in the store and used the restroom, then bought some "cheddar and bacon flavored fries". I don't even know how they can call them fries but they taste good.
Anyway, I came out and was walking toward my car, my mouth watering with anticipation of the pleasure of the "fries", when I saw hrough my windows Janice and Michael waving and pointing. I look, and on the other side of my car is a shaggy, golden retriever type dog. He looked at me, and started barking. I was so scared. In a split second I decided that running would be impossible, because dogs are fast and I have bad knees. So I ran up to my car, jumped up, and climbed onto the roof, scattering fries everywhere, while Janice was laughing her ass off. They could see me through the sunroof 🙂.
Then I threw fries at the dog, hoping he would be distracted so I could go in the door. Eventually he ran away and Janice opened the door and I dropped down. Since I left my fries on the sunroof, I had to open it to get them.. but the damn bag was half empty thanks to the damn dog.
And I thought my roof may have been dented. I'm not sure why I didn't jump onto the trunk. I guess that was too close to the dog, and I instinctively avoided that location. If I did try to jump on the trunk, I would have been running straight toward the dog though, and he probably would have lurched at me, tearing my testicles off and devouring my manhood while I bled to death 70 miles from civilization (no offense to anyone who lives in Giddings).
Thank goodness I didn't dent my roof. I did bend the sheetmetal, but it popped back up.
