We got in a discussion in class today about whether or not oral sex is "sex"...

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Aharami

Lifer
Aug 31, 2001
21,205
165
106
Originally posted by: mugs

Edit: I don't think anyone would deny that oral sex is sexual activity, but generally when you say you've had sex with someone, you're referring to intercourse.

true. but technically, oral sex is still sex.
 

PingSpike

Lifer
Feb 25, 2004
21,747
579
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Originally posted by: Stark
the only main difference is elimination of pregnancy risk

a girl who's given bjs to 50 guys is just as skanky as one who's slept with 50 guys... except you might still kiss the one who slept around. :p

plenty of people will vote no, and this has been the cop out view for years. They would probaly argue that butt love isn't sex either. "technical virginity" is a sham.

Couldn't have said it better myself. The technical virginity is just a way for people to act like whores and some how rationalize themselves as virgins in their head. I could care less if people screw tons of people, but don't feed me sh|t and call it ice cream.
 

BigToque

Lifer
Oct 10, 1999
11,700
0
76
Intercourse is a sexual act
A blow job is a sexual act.
A hand job is a sexual act.

Virginity is sexual innocence.
All 3 are sexual acts.
Therefore, all 3 constitute the loss of virginity.
 

axnff

Senior member
Dec 1, 2000
227
0
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Too many people here are defining "sex" as "penile penetration of the vagina". That would be the definition of "coitus". Sexual intercourse only requires manipulation of the genitals (the "sexual" part, in referring to a sex organ) between two sentient parties (man, woman, beast, the "intercourse" aspect of it). Therefore, oral sex is, by name and definition, technically considered "sex". To back this up, see also the definition of "sodomy", which could be summed up as "non-coitus sexual intercourse"...

I happen to find Stefan's definition of "virginity" to be quite interesting...
 

BigToque

Lifer
Oct 10, 1999
11,700
0
76
Originally posted by: axnff
Too many people here are defining "sex" as "penile penetration of the vagina". That would be the definition of "coitus". Sexual intercourse only requires manipulation of the genitals (the "sexual" part, in referring to a sex organ) between two sentient parties (man, woman, beast, the "intercourse" aspect of it). Therefore, oral sex is, by name and definition, technically considered "sex". To back this up, see also the definition of "sodomy", which could be summed up as "non-coitus sexual intercourse"...

I happen to find Stefan's definition of "virginity" to be quite interesting...

Well, the whole issue of "what is virginity" made me think about it for a while and that's the only thing I can come up with.

Intercourse, oral sex and hand jobs are all different things and can't be compared side by side. One thing that is common between all three is that they are all sexual acts.

In my mind, someone who has been involved in a sexual act is no longer innocent of sexual acts and therefore I define virginity as the point in which you lose your sexual innocence.
 

Vette73

Lifer
Jul 5, 2000
21,503
8
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Originally posted by: PingSpike
Originally posted by: Stark
the only main difference is elimination of pregnancy risk

a girl who's given bjs to 50 guys is just as skanky as one who's slept with 50 guys... except you might still kiss the one who slept around. :p

plenty of people will vote no, and this has been the cop out view for years. They would probaly argue that butt love isn't sex either. "technical virginity" is a sham.

Couldn't have said it better myself. The technical virginity is just a way for people to act like whores and some how rationalize themselves as virgins in their head. I could care less if people screw tons of people, but don't feed me sh|t and call it ice cream.


/thread

 

CQuinn

Golden Member
May 31, 2000
1,656
0
0
Mwilding and Mugs both pretty much gave the right explanation before I did,
but your still not emphasizing the right terms.


A lot of people here seem to have a confusion between Sexual Intercourse,
and Sexual Activity; and carry that confusion over to the belief that
if its not intercourse, it must not be SEX. Folks, its ALL sex... there are
just varying degrees of what kind of sex you are having.

And for the pedantic, there is also sexual behaviors which don't fall under the
standards of Sexually Active or Sexual Intercourse, but still involve sex.

"Thinking about it", is a sexual behavior, because 99.9% of us are capable of
becoming sexually aroused or at least interested just by using out imaginations.

Many of you are old enough to remember the "Baseball rules", but I will post an abridged
version for those who are not familiar with the concept.


"In the Game"
minor sexually intimate behavior, holding hands, hugs, light kisses, "spending time together".

First Base
Sexual intimacy, foreplay, light petting, strong kissing, rubbing, light clothed genital contact.

Second Base
Strong Sexual intimacy, foreplay, heavy petting, kissing non-facial areas, bites & hickies, heavy breathing,
under-clothes rubbing and light hand-to-gential contact. Stuff you probably would not do in a well lit crowded
room.

Third Base.
Strong sexual activity, clothes coming off, hand-genital, mouth-gential, and external genital-gential contact
"aka rubbing undies". Clothed HJs and BJs may fall into this category. Some forms of Penetration also
fall under this category. Also known as "light" sexual intercourse (less calories, less caffiene).

Stuff you wouldn't normally do in a dark public place. Unless you're Alanis Morissete.

Home Run
Sexual Intercourse, Genital to Gential Penetration, Anal Sex (yes it counts in here). .
HJs and BJs can also fall into this category, as they can be involved in some of the more esoteric
positions and techniques.
Basically if you have to look it up in "the Joy of Sex" or the Kama Sutra to
figure out if what you are trying is physically possible... then you might just be hitting a home run.


Everything from First Base on can be considered "having sex". Its just a matter of how much you are having.

So the question you should be asking is not does Oral Sex equal "sex", its what kind of "sex" does the oral
sex I'm having count as?

I disregard the whole virginity question as ill-defined. There are too many social, religous, medical and personal defintions
of that going around to qualify it properly for this thread. One can lose virginity without genital to genital penetration.


I hope this helps.

//You can thank my mother the nurse, for warping my understanding of human sexuality at an early age.










 

MAME

Banned
Sep 19, 2003
9,281
1
0
Originally posted by: Mwilding
Originally posted by: MAME
Let me ask this: if you have oral sex, do you lose your virginity? No, of course not.

Therefore oral sex is not sex

you logic is based on a fallacious assumption about losing your virginity.

I think most of the people that have given the moron answer to the first question think that the use of the word "sex" in "having sex" is an exclusive meaning. The truth is that "having sex" is an expression that uses the word sex to describe a particular act. Sex is pretty much anything involving sexual pleasure. Self-administered pocket pool is a sex act...

Losing your virginity requires penile penetration...

And a girl who gives BJ's to the whole football team is still a virgin even if she is a whoooer...

OK mr. Smarty Pants

dictionary.com says:
Sex - Sexual intercourse.
Sexual intercourse - Coitus between humans
Coitus - Sexual union between a male and a female involving insertion of the penis into the vagina


so the way I interpret sex seems to be true to the english language
 

sao123

Lifer
May 27, 2002
12,650
203
106
OK mr. Smarty Pants

dictionary.com says:


It also says:


Main Entry: sod·omy
Pronunciation: 'sä-d&-mE
Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English, from Old French sodomie, from Late Latin Sodoma Sodom; from the homosexual proclivities of the men of the city in Gen 19:1-11
1 : copulation with a member of the same sex or with an animal
2 : noncoital and especially anal or oral copulation with a member of the opposite sex

Main Entry: cop·u·late
Pronunciation: 'kä-py&-"lAt
Function: intransitive verb
Inflected Form(s): -lat·ed; -lat·ing
Etymology: Latin copulatus, past participle of copulare to join, from copula
: to engage in sexual intercourse
- cop·u·la·tion /"kä-py&-'lA-sh&n/ noun
- cop·u·la·to·ry /'kä-py&-l&-"tOr-E, -"tor-/ adjective

Oral Copulation is still sexual intercourse...which sexual intercourse is still sex


Main Entry: vir·gin
Pronunciation: 'v&r-j&n
Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English, from Old French virgine, from Latin virgin-, virgo young woman, virgin
1 a : an unmarried woman devoted to religion b capitalized : VIRGO
2 a : an absolutely chaste young woman b : an unmarried girl or woman
3 capitalized : VIRGIN MARY
4 a : a person who has not had sexual intercourse b : a person who is inexperienced in a usually specified sphere of activity: a virgin in politics
5 : a female animal that has never copulated
 

thomsbrain

Lifer
Dec 4, 2001
18,148
1
0
oral sex is a sexual activity, but it is not "sex" in the common definition of the word, which means sexual INTERCOURSE.
 

Ricochet

Diamond Member
Oct 31, 1999
6,390
19
81
It's obvious people can't even agree on the definition of sex. That's why any good study has to clearly define it at the beginning before quoting statistics.

For me, any sexual act will disqualify a person from being a virgin: that includes bjs and hjs.
 

Conky

Lifer
May 9, 2001
10,709
0
0
Here's an easy yardstick to measure whether something is sex or not. "Would a hooker be arrested for charging for it?"

Intercourse, yes. Oral sex, yes. Handjob, yes. Kissing, no, but who would pay to kiss a hooker? :laugh:

 

virtuamike

Diamond Member
Oct 13, 2000
7,845
13
81
Just because something is sexual doesn't make it sex. I'm from the school of thought that vaginal penetration is sex - everything else isn't the real thing.

As far as defining virginity, I give up. If you say so then you are so, nothing I can do to change your mind.

Regardless of my personal definitions, I don't think you need to have sex to cheat, but whatever helps you sleep at night.
 

virtuamike

Diamond Member
Oct 13, 2000
7,845
13
81
Originally posted by: Crazyfool
Here's an easy yardstick to measure whether something is sex or not. "Would a hooker be arrested for charging for it?"

Intercourse, yes. Oral sex, yes. Handjob, yes. Kissing, no, but who would pay to kiss a hooker? :laugh:

Then you're also saying that phone sex is sex. Or porn is sex. Stripping would be sex too, since they're getting paid for it. And yes, you can pay hookers for kisses (and people actually do it, you'd be surprised), so according to your definition that's sex too.

Your yardstick is dumb. Get a refund and buy some smarts.
 

Conky

Lifer
May 9, 2001
10,709
0
0
Originally posted by: virtuamike
Originally posted by: Crazyfool
Here's an easy yardstick to measure whether something is sex or not. "Would a hooker be arrested for charging for it?"

Intercourse, yes. Oral sex, yes. Handjob, yes. Kissing, no, but who would pay to kiss a hooker? :laugh:

Then you're also saying that phone sex is sex. Or porn is sex. Stripping would be sex too, since they're getting paid for it. And yes, you can pay hookers for kisses (and people actually do it, you'd be surprised), so according to your definition that's sex too.

Your yardstick is dumb. Get a refund and buy some smarts.

OK, @sshole. Add "physical contact with your penis"(another assumption, I know) to the above definition for smart people like yourself.

BTW, I'm sad for you that you pay hookers to kiss you.
 

virtuamike

Diamond Member
Oct 13, 2000
7,845
13
81
Originally posted by: Crazyfool
Originally posted by: virtuamike
Originally posted by: Crazyfool
Here's an easy yardstick to measure whether something is sex or not. "Would a hooker be arrested for charging for it?"

Intercourse, yes. Oral sex, yes. Handjob, yes. Kissing, no, but who would pay to kiss a hooker? :laugh:

Then you're also saying that phone sex is sex. Or porn is sex. Stripping would be sex too, since they're getting paid for it. And yes, you can pay hookers for kisses (and people actually do it, you'd be surprised), so according to your definition that's sex too.

Your yardstick is dumb. Get a refund and buy some smarts.

OK, @sshole. Add "physical contact with your penis"(another assumption, I know) to the above definition for smart people like yourself.

BTW, I'm sad for you that you pay hookers to kiss you.

Your argument got broken down with your own definitions and that's the best comeback you can come up with? Sad.

Your yardstick is a more of a measure of prostition than a valid definition for sex. Since when do you need money to call it sex?

I may be an ass but at least I know how to make a point and contribute to a discussion.
 

shuan24

Platinum Member
Jul 17, 2003
2,558
0
0
Originally posted by: newParadime
i dream about oral sex, does that count?


~new


i once knew a friend whos brother's girlfriend's cousin had oral sex, does that count?