Wanna Make $37.50 an hour, no degree needed?

[Isla]

Well, try your local medical college.

There is an article in my newspaper that says you can make $37.50 an hour as a surrogate patient for the med students. Sure, you end up getting a prostate probe or a pelvic exam about 10-15 times in one day, but most of the time you sit there waiting, reading magazines.

The people who do it say it's not that bad, and besides, they are doing something good for science!



Where do I sign up?

:Q:disgust:

 

[prodigy]

Prostate probe? <*insert pained expression on face*> OWWWWW

 

[jhu]

actually, it's more like pelvic exams (genitals and rectum). would you like to volunteer isla?

 

[Isla]

jhu, you wanna play doctor with me?



Actually, truth is, I had two kids at a teaching hospital when I was young(er) and poor. Each time, there was a parade of students coming in to watch me and check on my progress in labor! This included internal exams.

One student even gave me a survey while I was having contractions.

She even asked me if I had pets, and what kind!

Mr Isla was kind of freaked out by it, but I was like, &quot;yeah, whatever!&quot;

 

[Total Refected Power]

Uh... No.

I still have 8 years before the digital rectal exam. I think I will cherish each and every day!!!!!!!!!

 

[yakko]

<< Prostate probe? <*insert pained expression on face*> OWWWWW >>



Pained expression is an understatemnet. I wouldn't even look forward to doing it with a well trained doctor let alone a student. Anything else though I'm all for it for that kind of money.

 

[Monel Funkawitz]

I had a real bad stomach virus a few years back, and they gave me the &quot;finger&quot;. I never felt so violated in my life. I did manage to fart in the doctor's face, and although it did not elicit a response from him, it sure as hell made me feel better.

 

[etech]

TotalRefectedPower, hint, find a doctor with short skinny fingers. :Q

 

[jhu]

monel, it's either that or jamming a really long tube down your throat.

 

[fdiskboy]

Ugh. I've got about 12 years before I have to face the inevitable. I still think that's too short.

 

[perry]

<< Mr Isla was kind of freaked out by it, but I was like, &quot;yeah, whatever!&quot; >>



The drugs were that good, huh?

 

[Yeeny]

Hey, this might be something I can do! After three kids and my yearly exams for the last ten years, I am a regular pro!

 

[jhu]

awesome! i now have two &quot;patients&quot; (isla, girlfriday). anyone else?

 

[Isla]

Perry, actually, I had the first one without any pain medication, and I had the second once induced without any pain medication. I probably should have sued (I still get upset thinking about the pain) but if I did I'm certain half of the posters here would jump on my case. Served me right for not having medical insurance and being a college student! Medicaid wasn't meant to be 'nice'.

The third one was a charm, I didn't have to feel a thing! I was laughing, talking, and saying &quot;Hey, I think I'm in transition!&quot;

Who says money can't buy you happiness? OR at least a pain free birth experience.

 

[Nutcase99]

Uh oh! Hell I wanna make money.. maybe in a few years you guys can sign up to be a surrogate patitient when I'm in med school

 

[IBhacknU]

thanks... but I'll PASS

 

[The Wildcard]

Hmmm....tempting.....BUT NO.

 

[Elita1]

Probable scenario:

Medical Student:&quot;okay, now we are just going to take a small blood sample for the lab, allright?&quot;
surrogate patient:&quot;uhh....ok...&quot;
Medical Student: &quot;OK, and here we go--OOPS!&quot;
Surrogate patient:&quot;Oops?! whaddaya mean, OOPS??!!&quot;
Medical Student:&quot;No, no, nothing at all. Not to worry. Just shot a little air bubble into your bloodstream...nothing to be concerned about&quot;(quietly backs away and then makes a beeline for the door)



By the way, Isla, you're a saint. I was induced for my first and simply couldn't take it--they increased the pitocin way too quickly so I begged for an epidural after 8 hrs of hell. Baby literally exploded out of me! Kudos to you for being so brave.

 

[Isla]

I begged, Elita, I begged... and they put it off. Mr Isla was livid.

Yes, you know the sensation then.... sort of like a train crashing through a station.

Hey Elita, I'm starting to think you and I are cybertwins.

 

[Valhalla1]

too bad we dont have a medical college around here.. or I might just do it

 

[Champo41]

<< The people who do it say it's not that bad, and besides, they are doing something good for science! >>


No, they're just a pathetic bunch of losers that can't get a decent job or are too lazy to get one.

 

[Pretender]

As probably the only teenager here who's had a colonoscopy, pain is an understatement. The only good thing is pain killers and the fact that you're not fully conscious for much of it.

 

[SackOfAllTrades]

are there openings for surrogate corpses?