=w=girl's guide to having a conversation with a girl

weezergirl

Diamond Member
May 24, 2000
3,366
1
0
Once again, I'm going to help out the fellow geek with the age old problem of..."what do i talk to a girl about on a date".

As we all know, geeks arent' that great at conversing with the opposite sex. Dates, if they are able to get one, are filled with uncomfortable silences or else just plain boring the average girl who has no computer knowledge whatsoever.

Before I start I need to make some disclaimers since everytime I make one of these posts half the people get mad at me! :p
Disclaimer #1: Yes I know that some girls DO like to talk about computers and games. Geez, I'm an EE major! But as for generalizing, most girls don't know about that stuff and don't care. But if you are in the presence of a fellow female geek, then do talk about computers and games. it's a match made in heaven. you don't need my advice! :p
Disclaimer #2: Everything else I say and all advice given in this thread as well as my previous threads are ALL tongue in cheek, with a hint of truth. I am not liable for whatever happens if you follow what I say. I make NO guarantees!

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
On with the advice...
The general idea here is the best way to not bore a girl is to not spend the whole time talking about yourself. it should be an even exchange of information 50/50 up to 70/30 in favor of the girl. Appear engaged and amused. It's good to laugh at her jokes, it will make her feel more comfortable! :) But please, dont' bombard her with questions one after another..then it becomes an interview...it is good to talk about yourself too.

General topics to talk about with any girl whom you have just met and want to get to know better:
Where she grew up, what her life was like growing up, her family (brothers? sisters? what her parents are like?), school life or work life if she is done with school, future plans, where she has lived in the past, places she has visited, what she likes to do for fun, favorites (books, movies, cities, animals, food, ETC), music tastes, political views, sports, cars, interests, pets, cars, current news. Please note that some of these topics aren't meant for every girl...some girls are bored by sports..or don't really care about politics. I'm sure you'll know which topics to stay away from depending on the girl. :p

DATE SCENARIOS:
For situations where you are going out to eat: talk about favorite restaurants, if their food tastes good, have you been to this restaurant before, what's good on the menu, ask them for recommendations if they have been there before, comment on past experiences in the restaurant (that is if anything funny/weird happened), do you cook?, talk about bad attempts at cooking (opens a whole new door of funny things just waiting to be said), or brag about how you are such a great cook! :p and generally anything from above.
For situations after a movie: funny scenes from the movie, general opinion of said movie, gossip you heard about any of the stars in the movies, other movies of actors in said movie, recommendations of good movies, other movies that are out (have u seen? do you want to see..maybe lead to another date!), how outrageous movie food price is, good trailers, upcoming movies you want to see (may lead to another date), and generally anything from above.

Throughout all dates, while talking...certain topics will come up that should trigger something in your past that was funny! you should mention it (as long as it's not the WEIRD/funny type). It's always good to make a girl laugh. But don't try to make her laugh the whole way through, then it just gets old. For example, while talking about brothers and sisters..you can be like "when we were little..my brother pulled this horrible prank on me..." don't be afraid to embarass yourself. as long as you can laugh at yourself too. if it makes the girl laugh, it's worth it. :)

While talking to her if you find out she has some interest that corresponds with an interest of yours..pursue it! you guys like the same book? talk about other books you read....authors you like...etc. music is also a wide category that can be pursued...concerts...instruments you play yourself (girls like musicians! :p)...etc.

Last but not least, this is kind of funny but sometimes I talk about things I've read through AT. AT is a wonderful source of daily news and thought provoking discussions. You can mention "today i read an article about the NY lotto being 9-1-1..." ....conversation ensues...
or bring up a deep discussion on religion or abortion (although this will probably be better saved for a later date after you get to know her better :p). There are some great threads in ATOT that would be good conversation starters especially if you are running out of things to talk about.

Anyways, the easiest way is to find something you both have in common. It's easy to talk about something if you are passionate about it. Well this should get you through the first date at least!

anybody else have tips?

(yes, i sat here and typed this whole thing up. it's my 2nd to last day at work and i have nothing to do!!) hehe.
 

Ameesh

Lifer
Apr 3, 2001
23,686
0
0
tounge in cheek huh? sounds fun ;) (btw i am a musician, i played saxophone for 12 years, but i havent played in a while)
 

ElFenix

Elite Member
Super Moderator
Mar 20, 2000
102,179
7,541
126
wait wait wait you're a EE! hmmm... i knew that... nm.
 

kami

Lifer
Oct 9, 1999
17,627
4
81
Originally posted by: white
thank you, but first we have to get a girl to actually go out with us.
ROFL! That one had me laughing. Yeah weezergirl...most of the guys here need a PICK UP GUIDE first! :)

Nice post though.
 

weezergirl

Diamond Member
May 24, 2000
3,366
1
0
Originally posted by: white
thank you, but first we have to get a girl to actually go out with us.
You're right, i should have done weezergirl's guide to getting a date with a real girl FIRST. maybe next time :)
 

guyver01

Lifer
Sep 25, 2000
22,151
5
61
Originally posted by: weezergirl
Originally posted by: white
thank you, but first we have to get a girl to actually go out with us.
You're right, i should have done weezergirl's guide to getting a date with a real girl FIRST. maybe next time :)
yeah... show us how it's done the right way :)

 

ElFenix

Elite Member
Super Moderator
Mar 20, 2000
102,179
7,541
126
Originally posted by: weezergirl
Originally posted by: white
thank you, but first we have to get a girl to actually go out with us.
You're right, i should have done weezergirl's guide to getting a date with a real girl FIRST. maybe next time :)
well thats what you can do on the last day of work. :D
 

Red Dawn

Elite Member
Jun 4, 2001
57,530
3
0
Oh and one more thing, don't fondle yourself while you are talking to her. It will make her nervous and probably get you a faceful of Pepper Spray.
 

amnesiac

Lifer
Oct 13, 1999
15,781
1
71
Very good FAQ, =w=girl! :D
I'll add my two cents:

The first impression is the most important, and as much as I hate to say it, being "yourself" isn't always the best policy at first.

Here's examples of what NOT to do:

- Be overly negative. I have a lot of friends that are complete pessimists. They always bring themselves down, look down on things, and complain a lot. This works, but only if you're looking to attract other bitter, negative people. However, if you want a second date, hold back your insanely bitter view on the world.

- Be overtly sexual. I've seen guys start talking about sex and sexual subjects right from the get-go. Um, newsflash: that makes you
look like a creep. And you wonder why you don't get play?

- Talk about yourself. Don't offer any information about yourself unless asked. Yes, the girl wants to get to know you, but let her request the information first. By withholding information you make yourself more mysterious. Girls like that.

- Talk about your ex. Oh my god. You have no idea how many times I've heard this be the dealbreaker. During your conversation, you and the girl are the subjects. Leave your exes out of this. If you want to relate a story regarding an ex, say "one of my friends."

- Be too touchy. Let her initate any physical contact. Touching her hand/shoulder/etc. unless there is OBVIOUS physical attraction can be a big creep-out factor.

 

Geekbabe

Moderator Emeritus<br>Elite Member
Oct 16, 1999
32,037
2,038
126
www.theshoppinqueen.com
LOL,you all pay careful attention to Kim, she knows what she's talking about.However I don't know if even she can help some of you actually get a date, I think that would require divine intervention in some cases:)
 

weezergirl

Diamond Member
May 24, 2000
3,366
1
0
Originally posted by: amnesiac 2.0
Very good FAQ, =w=girl! :D
I'll add my two cents:

The first impression is the most important, and as much as I hate to say it, being "yourself" isn't always the best policy at first.

Here's examples of what NOT to do:

- Be overly negative. I have a lot of friends that are complete pessimists. They always bring themselves down, look down on things, and complain a lot. This works, but only if you're looking to attract other bitter, negative people. However, if you want a second date, hold back your insanely bitter view on the world.

- Be overtly sexual. I've seen guys start talking about sex and sexual subjects right from the get-go. Um, newsflash: that makes you
look like a creep. And you wonder why you don't get play?

- Talk about yourself. Don't offer any information about yourself unless asked. Yes, the girl wants to get to know you, but let her request the information first. By withholding information you make yourself more mysterious. Girls like that.

- Talk about your ex. Oh my god. You have no idea how many times I've heard this be the dealbreaker. During your conversation, you and the girl are the subjects. Leave your exes out of this. If you want to relate a story regarding an ex, say "one of my friends."

- Be too touchy. Let her initate any physical contact. Touching her hand/shoulder/etc. unless there is OBVIOUS physical attraction can be a big creep-out factor.
Yes, this is right on as well. Geeks sometimes are the CREEPIEST of guys. 1. because they don't know how to act normal around a girl and 2. they are too EAGER and not "cool" about being on a date with a girl. Both of these can come off as negative vibes to girls and scare them off. Girls dont' want a guy who's too easy. :p
 

Noriaki

Lifer
Jun 3, 2000
13,640
1
71
Originally posted by: baffled2
LOL,you all pay careful attention to Kim, she knows what she's talking about.However I don't know if even she can help some of you actually get a date, I think that would require divine intervention in some cases:)
Damn you baff!

I'm gonna get you back for this somehow!

:p
 

BD231

Lifer
Feb 26, 2001
10,568
136
106
Originally posted by: weezergirl
Girls dont' want a guy who's too easy. :p
Pfffft, please. Come on down to Cali and I'll have you thinking twice about that statement in no time. There is an equal amount of horn dog women out there as there are men. I hate it when chicks act like guy's are the only sluts on this earth :disgust:, gives the decent ones a bad repp. Highschool was so much worse than it had to be simply because SO MANY GIRLS wanted s*x!, and this is coming from A GUY. America has got me thinking of moving to Islam simply because the ladies are not allowed to be sexually free!, although I never would move there, the THOUGHT has gone through my head more than once. What ever happend to the walks on the beach and nice dinners? a movie here and there?, a trip to some far away place for fun? NOOOOOO, it has to be about s*x, emotional trauma, break up's and sour grape's. I'll pass
, maybe one day I'll run into a ladie who could care less about s*x from the get go, no luck as of yet.
 

oLLie

Diamond Member
Jan 15, 2001
5,203
1
0
Originally posted by: BD231
Originally posted by: weezergirl
Girls dont' want a guy who's too easy. :p
Pfffft, please. Come on down to Cali and I'll have you thinking twice about that statement in no time. There is an equal amount of horn dog women out there as there are men. I hate it when chicks act like guy's are the only sluts on this earth :disgust:, gives the decent ones a bad repp. Highschool was so much worse than it had to be simply because SO MANY GIRLS wanted s*x!, and this is coming from A GUY. America has got me thinking of moving to Islam simply because the ladies are not allowed to be sexually free!, although I never would move there, the THOUGHT has gone through my head more than once. What ever happend to the walks on the beach and nice dinners? a movie here and there?, a trip to some far away place for fun? NOOOOOO, it has to be about s*x, emotional trauma, break up's and sour grape's. I'll pass
, maybe one day I'll run into a ladie who could care less about s*x from the get go, no luck as of yet.
Yeah, someone said i had a small one too!!!!!! :|!!!!!!!!!

*edit* hehe just kidding... no one has said that about my small thingy................................................yet :Q

*edit2* um, i mean i don't have a small u know... i'm a grower not a shower (heard that on the radio today :D)

*edit3* seriously... i'm just kidding. DO YOU BELIEVE ME??????

*edit4* this reminds me of StormRider's self-deprecating posts about his lackage of the package.
 

Geekbabe

Moderator Emeritus<br>Elite Member
Oct 16, 1999
32,037
2,038
126
www.theshoppinqueen.com
Originally posted by: weezergirl
Originally posted by: white
thank you, but first we have to get a girl to actually go out with us.
You're right, i should have done weezergirl's guide to getting a date with a real girl FIRST. maybe next time :)
Hmmm.. I would think the cost of mailing all these dudes baseball bats and burlap sacks to carry their prospective dates home in would bankrupt you Kim :)
 

Geekbabe

Moderator Emeritus<br>Elite Member
Oct 16, 1999
32,037
2,038
126
www.theshoppinqueen.com
Originally posted by: BD231
Originally posted by: weezergirl
Girls dont' want a guy who's too easy. :p
Pfffft, please. Come on down to Cali and I'll have you thinking twice about that statement in no time. There is an equal amount of horn dog women out there as there are men. I hate it when chicks act like guy's are the only sluts on this earth :disgust:, gives the decent ones a bad repp. Highschool was so much worse than it had to be simply because SO MANY GIRLS wanted s*x!, and this is coming from A GUY. America has got me thinking of moving to Islam simply because the ladies are not allowed to be sexually free!, although I never would move there, the THOUGHT has gone through my head more than once. What ever happend to the walks on the beach and nice dinners? a movie here and there?, a trip to some far away place for fun? NOOOOOO, it has to be about s*x, emotional trauma, break up's and sour grape's. I'll pass
, maybe one day I'll run into a ladie who could care less about s*x from the get go, no luck as of yet.


Maybe you ought to rethink your decision to stop taking your medication ? :Q
 

Noriaki

Lifer
Jun 3, 2000
13,640
1
71
Originally posted by: baffled2
Originally posted by: weezergirl
Originally posted by: white
thank you, but first we have to get a girl to actually go out with us.
You're right, i should have done weezergirl's guide to getting a date with a real girl FIRST. maybe next time :)
Hmmm.. I would think the cost of mailing all these dudes baseball bats and burlap sacks to carry their prospective dates home in would bankrupt you Kim :)
Ahhh!

How evil!
 

Geekbabe

Moderator Emeritus<br>Elite Member
Oct 16, 1999
32,037
2,038
126
www.theshoppinqueen.com
Originally posted by: Noriaki
Originally posted by: baffled2
Originally posted by: weezergirl
Originally posted by: white
thank you, but first we have to get a girl to actually go out with us.
You're right, i should have done weezergirl's guide to getting a date with a real girl FIRST. maybe next time :)
Hmmm.. I would think the cost of mailing all these dudes baseball bats and burlap sacks to carry their prospective dates home in would bankrupt you Kim :)
Ahhh!

How evil!

of course it's evil, don't you read enough threads around here.. all women are evil remember ? :)



Btw, I think Weezergirl totally rocks,she's seriously given some good advice here !
 

Noriaki

Lifer
Jun 3, 2000
13,640
1
71
Yeah...I've read all those threads. I just disagree. Only YOU are evil :)

<Ponderance>

I generally think the guy is equally at fault though. Of course he always blames it on her...but I think that if guys would relax a bit, and not go all insane trying to find a partner and latch onto anything with the opposing genitalia, then you wouldn't get all the evil women. You just have to take it easy, and wait until you find the right sorta girl, then you put your effort into her. Then she won't seem so evil.

Granted, I don't date or have much of a sex drive. So I could be way off. And judging from the evidence at hand, I obviously am way off.

My theories rarely work in practice though (about anything, not just this subject).

And that, as they say, is that.

</Ponderance>
 

PG

Diamond Member
Oct 25, 1999
3,426
44
91
With all the teen angst threads that get posted this thread should get it's own sticky or be put in a new AT FAQ section.

 

Geekbabe

Moderator Emeritus<br>Elite Member
Oct 16, 1999
32,037
2,038
126
www.theshoppinqueen.com
Since you asked for additional tips Kim,here's my contribution


1.Do NOT take her picture and post it here without her express permission ! That is wrong on so many levels !

2, being romantic doesn't have to take a ton of money or effort, listen to the girl, if she tells you she like a certain flower or chocolate or any small thing,surprise her with it when she leasts expects it. It's not so much the treat it's the fact that you showed you were actually listening that gets you points with the ladies.
 

ASK THE COMMUNITY