Yes if you change the ports or protocol (UDP / TCP) the VPN runs on you'd have to make corresponding changes at the server/remote side as well as on your local and remote firewalls / port forwarding routers etc.
There are public protocol / port scanner tools that can help identify what protocols and ports are able to pass through a given firewall / network. These can be helpful in determining what is an effective setting to use for a VPN or other communicating program to best traverse the networks it has to.
You have to be a little careful using port scanners to look for open ports / protocols, though, since some networks / firewalls will detect that type of scanning as a problem and may even lock you out of things that you'd NORMALLY have had access to if it wasn't for the scanner's action creating a lock down.
NMAP is one good free general purpose port scanner:
http://nmap.org/
http://nmap-online.com/
http://scan.sygate.com/quickscan.html
http://www.auditmypc.com/firewall-test.asp
http://www.speedguide.net/networktools.php
You're doing something a little more complicated since you just need to find one or a small few reliably open ports / protocols that will work in various circumstances / locations, and you need the ports / protocols to be open both at your remote location as well as through the ISP / networks leading to your server side location. In general it is best to pick a hand full of commonly used protocols / ports and try to use those one at a time selectively to see which one(s) work from various locations instead of doing bulk scans of tons of ports / protocols all at once.
You mentioned not being able to get to a login screen from one spot... I assume you mean the VPN login for your own remote server. In general you MUST authenticate LOCALLY to the wireless network in your area somehow before it'll pass ANY traffic for your PC to / from the internet. Be sure you have authenticated to the WLAN you're on and have something successful like basic web access to the internet through that WLAN before you even think of testing the VPN function or looking for open ports for the VPN.
Again a lot of locations will be going through a NAT, possibly on both sides of your VPN link, so you'd need a VPN protocol with NAT traversal on one or both ends. Have you tried hamachi?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hamachi
If you have a test machine that is secure that you could leave 100% open to the internet on all ports / protocols and even which can run a given test software to respond to your remote access attempts on all those ports/protocols (on your remote "home" end) then that'd make it very much easier to test what settings can be used since you'd only have to debug / configure ONE end of the connection for a test.