Vote Stewie for Governor of California

[sMiLeYz]

I got to admit hes far better than other canadiates...

Stewie's campaign website

His stance on important issues...

ON THE IRAQ WAR: "For God's sake, Mr. Bush, if you're going to lie to the entire country, at least make it sound plausible. I mean, Iraq with weapons of mass destruction? It's practically a third world country, you imbecile! They're lucky if they can make Shrinky Dinks! Now, if you'd really wanted to get this nation of piddling morons on your side, you should've told them Saddam Hussein is actually just Gallagher in a beret."

ON GAY RIGHTS: "Homosexuals deserve the same rights as anyone else. Including the right to marry whomever I - I mean, they choose. They are a truly magnificent group of people. I've heard. From other people. I mean, I'm not gay. What are you rolling your eyes for? I said I'M NOT GAY! DAMN YOU!!"

ON DRUGS: "All I know is, that LSD is powerful stuff. One time Brian tricked me into trying some, and for the next two hours I had the most intense conversation of my life with Liza Minelli. When I came out of it she was gone, of course, but the strange thing was that somebody had eaten half an entire roast beef from the fridge."

ON FREE SPEECH: "I say, bravo, Michael Moore!! I applaud your show of testicular fortitude at the Oscars. Any rabble-rouser is a man after my own heart! Besides, at least that was two minutes where we didn't have to listen to Cameron Diaz trying to sound out the words on the goddamn teleprompter."

ON SEX EDUCATION: "I say to hell with sex education!! The more pregnant teens there are, the more futureless babies will be born which I can then brainwash into joining my army of infants to take over the world."

ON ABORTION: "Once again, see above-referenced platform regarding my army of infants to take over the world."

ON PROSTITUTION: "If Eddie Murphy wants to keep whoring himself out for those "Dr. DoLittle" movies, who am I to criticize him?"

ON WORLD HUNGER: "It's so bloody depressing to see those photos of emaciated people who look like they haven't eaten a thing in six months. And that's just the Marc Jacobs ads. Ba-ZING!!"

ON GUN CONTROL: "Fine. As long as I'm the one controlling the guns."

 

[DealMonkey]

Listen to me Mister Cent, you want to make it in this business, lay off the doobie! Stewie for governor!

ROTFLMAO. I love Stewie. Plus, he can pronounce "California."

 

[Lonyo]

At least he's honest.

 

[LilBlinbBlahIce]

Victory is mine!

 

[BDawg]

Originally posted by: DealMonkey

Listen to me Mister Cent, you want to make it in this business, lay off the doobie! Stewie for governor!

ROTFLMAO. I love Stewie. Plus, he can pronounce "California."

You mean the correct pronounciation isn't "Kah-lee-four-nee-yah?"

 

[DealMonkey]

Originally posted by: BDawg

Originally posted by: DealMonkey

Listen to me Mister Cent, you want to make it in this business, lay off the doobie! Stewie for governor!

ROTFLMAO. I love Stewie. Plus, he can pronounce "California."

You mean the correct pronounciation isn't "Kah-lee-four-nee-yah?"

Maybe in "No' Car-O-lie-nee" it is.

 

[sandorski]

 

[PatboyX]

i dont know, stewie has yet to suggest that we all deserve "fantastic jobs."

 

[Evadman]

Hehe. 2 points for fox

 

[Flyermax2k3]

LMAO!!! That was absolutely hilarious! Stewie rocks

 

[Gnurb]

what the deuce?!

 

[Flyermax2k3]

"I'm thinking of a word and it's not kitty"
"let me guess, is it kitty?"
"GET OUT OF MY HEAD!!!!!!!!"
I do a perfect Chris impersonation, I'll have to record it some time...

 

[thedarkwolf]

Finally a canidate I can get behind no wait I am not gay

 

[SinnerWolf]

Blast you and your estrogenical treachery!