Jeez. Why don't you just shoot yourself? It'll probably solve your problem faster and be less painless.
So much for propriatory formats. Something to look forward to 20-30 years from now when we'll have to deal with terrabytes of data encoded in crappy .doc files and encrypted PDF's.
Anyways.
Idea #1:
I am sure somewere, somebody created a device you could plug your VGA cable into a little box and send the data to the network. Of course with VNC and such it will probably be rare and expensive.
Idea#2:
Find somebody with space in his office or a hapless cubical dweller. Stick the computer in there, tell them to press enter every once of a while and page you if it craps out.
Idea#3:
Get a webcam, get a crappy laptop. Stick the crappy laptop and webcam in front of the computer and have it broadcast the images on your network.
Idea#4:
Probably the best one. Ditch the crappy computer. Run Win3.11 in a emulatory (? I am tired. emulation) and use VNC on the modern OS.
I suggest
bocsh, it's a full PC emulation, meaning that the entire computer is emulated in software. From the disk drives, cdrom, floppy. Them memory is emulated in memory, the CPU is emulated. You even have software BIOSes for the Emulated computer and VGA. Best bet for compatability. And it's free.
But if you have VMWare laying around, run it in that. It'll probably be faster. Hell anything will be faster. Bosch on a modern computer will (probably) kick a 486 in the nuts in terms of performance.