Vent about screwing up your kids life

[Texashiker]

Names have been changed to protect the guilty, this is a true story that I need to vent about.

John doe meets Jane doe, they fall in love and plan to get married.
Jane comes up pregnant
John and Jane get into a couple of big fights and split up before baby is born

Baby is born - its a beautiful little girl

Fastward 3 years

John and Jane live about 100 miles apart, John sees daughter on regular basis

Jane gets strung out on prescription pain killers (Lortabs and OxyContin were mentioned) and alcohol.
Family member calls Child Protection Services (CPS)
CPS visits the moms house, CPS deems mom unfit
Child is removed from house and placed with grand mother (Janes mom)
Grandmother lives in same town as Jane, she is nearest relative get the child out of the home
CPS is visiting with dad later this week to give him custody of child

Jane doe is only allowed supervised visitation - at no time is jane allowed to be alone with the child. Yea, its that bad.


If you want to screw up your life, that is one thing. But dont screw up the life of your child.

 

[rivan]

I've seen this a couple times in my own social circles. Both times, the fathers ended up with custody, and both times the kids are way better off.

 

[ch33zw1z]

Shitty, kinda hard to not screw up a 3 year olds life if you're the caretaker and you can't take care of yourself..

 

[Wyndru]

Lortab is a helluva drug.

 

[vi edit]

I've seen this a couple times in my own social circles. Both times, the fathers ended up with custody, and both times the kids are way better off.

Same here. I worked with a guy that got sole custody of his 4 year old daughter when his wife was an alcoholic with an arrest record for DUI and some other petty things. I was around them for 5 years and watched her grow up. She was one of the brightest, and most behaved kids I'd ever been around.

 

[HumblePie]

I find that guys nowadays are better the parent than many of the moms in these situations. It's been a big societal change I think, but the laws haven't changed though. Oh well.

 

[ElFenix]

a friend of mine is working through her first case as a child advocate for CPS over here in houston. the mother of the child is a ward of CPS still herself.

 

[MisterJackson]

I fought for, and won custody of, my son when he was three. He's thirteen now. It was NOT easy for me to win back then. Courts here are most definitely skewed towards favoring the mother, even if they're like you described above. I knew at the time I fought for custody that my ex was also into pills, alcohol, etc., but it was not something I could prove. Fortunately I had a good attorney and finally landed a sympathetic judge. Oddly enough, the judge who finally listened was female. I thought for sure I was screwed with a female judge behind the bench, but she read my ex the riot act.

 

[Macamus Prime]

It's a shame. Too bad the child won't have both parents in her life. But, it's good to see the father fulfilling the role of a real man.

 

[ussfletcher]

a friend of mine is working through her first case as a child advocate for CPS over here in houston. the mother of the child is a ward of CPS still herself.

Mandatory birth control is in order, yes?

 

[edro]

How old are the parents?

 

[Texashiker]

How old are the parents?

Around 28 and 27 years old.

Jane has fought addiction for years, she had a drinking problem the first time I met her. And there have been other drugs in her past, maybe a round of crystal meth, and some weed. But whiskey has always been with her.

Jane comes from a good family - both parents are professionals, make good money, and are very caring for the family in general. Its not uncommon for them to have a party and have uncles, cousins,,, the whole family over.

 

[Joseph F]

Lortab is a helluva drug.

LOL not really, bud.

 

[FallenHero]

I really don't see anything exceptional about this story other then the fact that CPS actually did something.

 

[preslove]

Preventing situations like these is why god created abortion.

 

[Rumpltzer]

Need a license to drive. Need a license to build a house. Gotta go through a background check to purchase a gun.

Anyone is allowed to have a kid... as many as they want!



Things will change when I'm in charge.

 

[ElFenix]

Mandatory birth control is in order, yes?

this is the child's second child. first child she willingly gave up for adoption. apparently the adoptive parents are so happy with the first child that they want the second if she's also put into protective custody. that's a very good situation, getting to grow up with your birth sibling.

mother isn't a bad girl but apparently is in CPS's shelters a lot where she's picked on and thereby gets in lots of fights.

 

[PokerGuy]

Sad but I think probably all too common. The interest of the child is the important thing. Someone who can't take care of themselves most certainly can't take care of a child.

 

[Texashiker]

Sad but I think probably all too common. The interest of the child is the important thing. Someone who can't take care of themselves most certainly can't take care of a child.

Another Jane doe that I knew the late 1990s - after her and her husband divorced, she moved in with this new guy. Her new "boyfriend" introduced her to drugs, and then started molesting her two kids. The 2 kids were around 3 - 5 years old.

CPS got involved in this case as well. The boyfriend beat the mom so bad he broke her ribs and she had to go to the local Emergency Room. When the doctors and nurses at the ER saw her condition, they called CPS right then. I think the mom was still in the ER when CPS showed up, got her information, went to her house and took the kids.

The 2 kids stayed in foster homes for about 6 months while the mom went through rehab.

The kids dad found out what was going on. He took mom to court and got full custody.

Not only were the kids sexually abused, they were moved around in the foster system until the dad got custody.

Mom lived in California, dad lived in Texas, so it was a legal mess trying to get everything sorted out. From what I heard, CPS in California did not want the kids leaving the state, but the dad wanted possession. The mom was arrested on a warrant she had in Texas, and extradited back to Texas. While she was in Texas on an unrelated criminal charge, the dad filed court papers for full possession. Once she was in Texas, Texas law applied, and no more having to deal with California CPS. The lawyer pushed for a quick court date because the issue was about kids.

When the mom and dad left the court hearing about the change of possession, the mom was crying and had her face in her hands. I felt really bad for her, but it was in the best interest of the kids.

She never did get the kids back.

 

[rh71]

drugs & alcohol

 

[dquan97]

Another Jane doe that I knew the late 1990s - after her and her husband divorced, she moved in with this new guy. Her new "boyfriend" introduced her to drugs, and then started molesting her two kids. The 2 kids were around 3 - 5 years old.

CPS got involved in this case as well. The boyfriend beat the mom so bad he broke her ribs and she had to go to the local Emergency Room. When the doctors and nurses at the ER saw her condition, they called CPS right then. I think the mom was still in the ER when CPS showed up, got her information, went to her house and took the kids.

The 2 kids stayed in foster homes for about 6 months while the mom went through rehab.

The kids dad found out what was going on. He took mom to court and got full custody.

Not only were the kids sexually abused, they were moved around in the foster system until the dad got custody.

Mom lived in California, dad lived in Texas, so it was a legal mess trying to get everything sorted out. From what I heard, CPS in California did not want the kids leaving the state, but the dad wanted possession.

That's terrible (for the bf)...I believe most people (99.9%) here have strong feelings against molesters

 

[qliveur]

Lortab is a helluva drug.

I guess... if you like watered-down foo-foo narcotics.

 

[Wyndru]

I guess... if you like watered-down foo-foo narcotics.

There are ways around that :sneaky:

LOL not really, bud.

Hydrocodone is some pretty serious shit. You can get really hooked on it.

 

[Leros]

At least it happened while the child was young. She can grow up having a relatively normal life now.

 

[fire400]

guy gets remarried? kid has a mom at that point.

x-wife goes crazy?

who wants to know the rest of the story?

domestic violence might have been the result of the alcoholic x-wife, or stratification. but of course, she does have the choice in the end.