Valentine's poems

[Amused]

THESE ARE ENTRIES TO A WASHINGTON POST COMPETITION ASKING FOR A RHYME WITH THE MOST ROMANTIC FIRST LINE, BUT THE LEAST ROMANTIC SECOND LINE:

Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss
But I only slept with you, because I was pissed.

I thought that I could love no other
Until, that is, I met your brother.

Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.
But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl's
empty and so is your head.

Of loving beauty you float with grace
If only you could hide your face.

Kind, intelligent, loving and hot
This describes everything you are not.

I want to feel your sweet embrace
But don't take that paper bag off of your face.

I love your smile, your face, and your eyes
Damn, I'm good at telling lies!

My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife:
Marrying you screwed up my life.

I see your face when I am dreaming.
That's why I always wake up screaming.

My love, you take my breath away.
What have you stepped in to smell this way?

My feelings for you no words can tell
Except for maybe "Go To Hell."

What inspired this amorous rhyme?
Two parts vodka, one part lime

 

[imported_LoKe]

Only read a few, but I giggled.

 

[PingSpike]

That was actually pretty funny, particularly the paper bag one.

 

[Amused]

Originally posted by: PingSpike
That was actually pretty funny, particularly the paper bag one.

The dreaming and wife ones are my favorites. 😀

 

[HN]

But soft! What light through yonder window breaks? It is the east
and you are blocking it's way so can you please move

 

[Amused]

Originally posted by: HN
But soft! What light through yonder window breaks? It is the east
and you are blocking it's way so can you please move

Guess you missed the part that said "RHYME" huh?

 

[HN]

Originally posted by: Amused

Originally posted by: HN
But soft! What light through yonder window breaks? It is the east
and you are blocking it's way so can you please move

Guess you missed the part that said "RHYME" huh?

yes, yes i did. the morning and all-caps threw me off 😱

 

[Amused]

Originally posted by: HN

Originally posted by: Amused

Originally posted by: HN
But soft! What light through yonder window breaks? It is the east
and you are blocking it's way so can you please move

Guess you missed the part that said "RHYME" huh?

yes, yes i did. the morning and all-caps threw me off 😱

LOL 😀

 

[hypn0tik]

I love you so very much my dear Nicole
Now get on your knees and suck my pole.

 

[Amused]

I love you so very much my dear Nicole
To touch the sides would take a telephone pole.

 

[hypn0tik]

Seeing your face, so beautiful, makes my day
You remind me of a pig, rolling around in hay.

 

[Amused]

Your undying love and devotion is just my luck
'Cause your face looks like it was hit by a truck

 

[BlueFlamme]

Roses are red, violets are black
Why is your chest as flat as my back?

 

[hypn0tik]

In my heart, you hold a very special space
Chuck Norris needs to kick you in the face.

 

[JMWarren]

Didn't read the whole thread...disregard

 

[HN]

The love we make enriches my body, my soul
But the wife i must face, and lie to that troll

 

[loup garou]

I see your face when I am dreaming.
That's why I always wake up screaming.

ROFL :laugh:

 

[AbAbber2k]

Originally posted by: loup garou

I see your face when I am dreaming.
That's why I always wake up screaming.

ROFL :laugh:

FTW :thumbsup:

 

[Amused]

Your love for me will never die
It will, however, make me cry

 

[hondAS2ooo170]

Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss
But I only slept with you, because I was pissed.

 

[The Godfather]

Originally posted by: BlueFlamme
Roses are red, violets are black
Why is your chest as flat as my back?

Haha

 

[Mrvile]

Haha, the dream one was good 😀

 

[Amused]

My love for you knows no border
Not even the restraining order.

 

[Koing]

Funny :thumbsup:

Koing

 

[LtPage1]

the dreaming one wins.