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UPS man peed in my yard...

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Perknose

Forum Director & Omnipotent Overlord
Forum Director
Oct 9, 1999
46,873
10,668
147
Originally posted by: NetGuySC
Call the local postmaster and report it

While you have him on the phone, report the electric meter reader to him as well, then, while he's trying to figure out just how retarded you really are, ask him out on a gay date! ;)

 

lokiju

Lifer
May 29, 2003
18,526
5
0
While I wouldn't be happy to have this happen on a regular basis, I really wouldn't give a shit if it happened to me.
 

boomerang

Lifer
Jun 19, 2000
18,883
641
126
The very best thing you can do, is pretend you weren't home.

Everyone is telling you it's not a big deal. Find a way to deal with it. This revenge angle you've got going on in your head is not healthy.
 

palswim

Golden Member
Nov 23, 2003
1,049
0
71
www.palswim.net
Originally posted by: b2386
*sigh* Do you not realize that urine causes dead patches and lawn burn due to the high levels of nitrogen that is released into the lawn through the urine? Google it if you don't believe me. And no, it doesn't take multiple uses on the same spot to cause permanent damage. Like I already said, I have taught my dogs to not go in the yard so this does not occur. I paid over $15000 to have my lawn sodded about two years ago so the last thing I want is some guy detracting from the cosmetic appearance I work so hard to maintain.

You think you could direct him to my house next time? We've been trying to kill our yard for the past year and a half, but it keeps growing!
 

RiDE

Platinum Member
Jul 8, 2004
2,139
0
76
At least he peed after and not before he delivered your package.
 

Perknose

Forum Director & Omnipotent Overlord
Forum Director
Oct 9, 1999
46,873
10,668
147
Originally posted by: lokiju
While I wouldn't be happy to have this happen on a regular basis, I really wouldn't give a shit if it happened to me.

Is that a pun? :laugh:

 

JD50

Lifer
Sep 4, 2005
11,918
2,883
136
Originally posted by: b2386
Originally posted by: HardcoreRobot
carry on with life.

man has been pissing on the ground for many many years.

I have a couple of problems with that:

1. Urine leaves yellow spots on the sod. That's why I taught my dogs to go in the leaves.
2. I don't want my dogs or myself walking through a grown man's waste.
3. If he did it today, there is no telling how many times he has done it when I am not at home.

How did everyone else miss this little gem. Do you have yellow spots all over your lawn? If not, then obviously he's not this evil serial urinator that you're so afraid of.
 

loup garou

Lifer
Feb 17, 2000
35,132
1
81
Originally posted by: JD50
Originally posted by: b2386
Originally posted by: HardcoreRobot
carry on with life.

man has been pissing on the ground for many many years.

I have a couple of problems with that:

1. Urine leaves yellow spots on the sod. That's why I taught my dogs to go in the leaves.
2. I don't want my dogs or myself walking through a grown man's waste.
3. If he did it today, there is no telling how many times he has done it when I am not at home.

How did everyone else miss this little gem. Do you have yellow spots all over your lawn? If not, then obviously he's not this evil serial urinator that you're so afraid of.

:laugh:
 

Xylitol

Diamond Member
Aug 28, 2005
6,617
0
76
if you know the tracking number, there's no telling what you can do
read the 'tracking number' thread for some ideas...
 

judasmachine

Diamond Member
Sep 15, 2002
8,515
3
81
Originally posted by: b2386
Originally posted by: dNor
Originally posted by: b2386
Originally posted by: AlienCraft
Originally posted by: b2386
Originally posted by: OdiN
What would you have told him if he asked to use your restroom?

If when giving me my package, he had asked to use the restroom because he had to go really bad, I would have let him. I don't mind when people use my toilets. I do mind, though, when people act like some untrained animal and treat my yard as some big diaper. There are woods about 20 feet away from where he peed. If he had walked those 20 feet into the woods and peed, I would not have a problem. But its the fact that he peed in the yard on my expensive sod where me and my dogs walk. There is no excuse for that sort of behavior.
Having to go really bad is an excuse. You may not like it, or accept it, but it is still the best excuse in this sort of situation.

You mean he has a good excuse for not walking the extra 20-30 feet to go in the woods?

He could probably tell you wouldn't do shit about it except post on ATOT, so he just whipped it out and drained.

Like I said, if anyone has any revenge suggestions, please feel free to post them. I serious want to get this guy back.

just remember that if you don't get this guy's job, he's still gonna be the one handling your future shipments. revenge will just take all of this to a whole new level.
 

The J

Senior member
Aug 30, 2004
755
0
76
The UPS man peed on your fucking lawn!? That lawn really tied the neighborhood together, did it not?
 

moshquerade

No Lifer
Nov 1, 2001
61,504
12
56
Well, if this occurred at my place the first thing I would do is try to get a better view. :evil:
 

Terabyte

Diamond Member
Dec 19, 1999
3,875
0
71
Originally posted by: The J
The UPS man peed on your fucking lawn!? That lawn really tied the neighborhood together, did it not?

Not as well as my car's driver side mirror :(
 

moshquerade

No Lifer
Nov 1, 2001
61,504
12
56
Originally posted by: Pale Rider
Put up a little sign in your yard that reads "UPS Man Keep Off the Grass".
Or maybe "There's no "P" in GRASS, so kindly keep it that way."
 

b2386

Member
Jan 30, 2005
130
0
0
Originally posted by: RapidSnail
Next time, spread your pompous urine all over his truck and ask him where the DHL guy went.

Now that's not a bad idea or at least a variation of that... I may be getting a couple of friends involved, too. This is gonna get good! :D
 

Capt Caveman

Lifer
Jan 30, 2005
34,543
651
126
Originally posted by: Terabyte
Originally posted by: Nuwave
Originally posted by: MrDudeMan

Oh noes he pissed on grass. It's evaporated by now and is no different than any animal pissing in the yard. Do you soap up every spot in the grass that you let your dogs piss on?


Urine KILLS grass. Ask dog owners, and landlords who allow pets.

I don't know about your dogs, but I see most dogs PEE ON THE GRASS. :confused:

And they kill it do to the high concentration of nitrates. I have three dogs. I know.

OP - if the episode bothers you, call UPS and file a complaint
 

rubix

Golden Member
Oct 16, 1999
1,302
2
0
hey bro, i sent you some pee in the mail. did you get it? upees told me they delivered it, but i just wanted to make sure.