Ummm... that's professor Soxfan to you

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Sho'Nuff

Diamond Member
Jul 12, 2007
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I just learned that I will be teaching a law school class this fall, starting next week! D::DD::DD::DD::DD::D

Should be fun. First class down . . . XXXXYYY more years to tenured status.
 

Gibson486

Lifer
Aug 9, 2000
18,378
1
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You lawyers always find ways distort reality and law. In fact, you even disprove the law of supply and demand. There are a sh!tload of lawyers... more than one can handle, but prices still remain high as if the service of a lawyer is hard to come by.
 

DesiPower

Lifer
Nov 22, 2008
15,299
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Q: How can you tell if a lawyer is well hung?
A: You can't get a finger between the rope and his neck!

Q: If you are stranded on a desert island with Adolph Hitler, Atilla the Hun, and a lawyer, and you have a gun with only two bullets, what do you do?
A: Shoot the lawyer twice.

Q: What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?
A: A good start!

Q: How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?
A: His lips are moving.

Q: What's the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?
A: There are skid marks in front of the dog.

Q: Why won't sharks attack lawyers?
A: Professional courtesy.

Q: What do you have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?
A: Not enough sand.

Q: Why did God make snakes just before lawyers?
A: To practice.

A command was given to a dog: "SPEAK!"
The dog said in return: "Not without my lawyer present!"

Q: Why is going to a meeting of the Bar Association like going into a bait shop?
A: Because of the abundance of suckers, leeches, maggots and nightcrawlers

Q: Why are there so many lawyers in the U.S.?
A: Because St. Patrick chased the snakes out of Ireland.

Q: What’s the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?
A: The lawyer charges more.
 

Phokus

Lifer
Nov 20, 1999
22,994
779
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You lawyers always find ways distort reality and law. In fact, you even disprove the law of supply and demand. There are a sh!tload of lawyers... more than one can handle, but prices still remain high as if the service of a lawyer is hard to come by.

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Lawyer salaries are weird as hell, you're either rich as hell or poor as fuck, with very little in between.
 

acheron

Diamond Member
May 27, 2008
3,171
2
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a prostitute?

The prostitute stops screwing you after you're dead.

(my wife is a lawyer, so I have a good source for lawyer jokes. :p )
 

Sho'Nuff

Diamond Member
Jul 12, 2007
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You lawyers always find ways distort reality and law. In fact, you even disprove the law of supply and demand. There are a sh!tload of lawyers... more than one can handle, but prices still remain high as if the service of a lawyer is hard to come by.

Amazing how the actions of so few can taint the image of so many. By and large, lawyers are quite useful and do not muck up "the system."

But for fun, here is my favorite lawyer joke:

An old man was on his death bed. He wanted badly to take all his money with him. He called his priest, his doctor and his lawyer to his bedside.

"Here's $30,000 cash to be held by each of you. I trust you to put this in my coffin when I die so I can take all my money with me."

At the funeral, each man put an envelope in the coffin.

Riding away in a limousine, the priest suddenly broke into tears and confessed that he had only put $20,000 into the envelope because he needed $10,000 for a new baptistery.

"Well, since we're confiding in each other," said the doctor, "I only put $10,000 in the envelope because we needed a new machine at the hospital which cost $20,000."

The lawyer was aghast. "I'm ashamed of both of you," he exclaimed.

"I want it known that when I put my envelope in that coffin, it held my personal check for the full $30,000."
 

Jeeebus

Diamond Member
Aug 29, 2006
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What are you teaching?

I'm thinking about teaching a pre-trial advocacy or legal writing class at one of the local schools down here.
 

sjwaste

Diamond Member
Aug 2, 2000
8,757
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What are you teaching/where? Based on your location, it's either FPLC or you're insane and going to drive into Boston?

I've thought about trying to teach at a paralegal school to make some extra money, but then I remembered I went to law school at night and going from my day job to school until 10pm every night kind of sucked.

Good luck!
 

Sho'Nuff

Diamond Member
Jul 12, 2007
6,211
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What are you teaching?

I'm thinking about teaching a pre-trial advocacy or legal writing class at one of the local schools down here.

An advanced patent drafting class. The focus of the class is to give the students some practical skills that they can apply in their first job in a patent law firm. It will start with taking an invention disclosure during a mock inventor interview, and end with the drafting of a complete patent application. Should be fun.
 
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Sho'Nuff

Diamond Member
Jul 12, 2007
6,211
121
106
What are you teaching/where? Based on your location, it's either FPLC or you're insane and going to drive into Boston?

I've thought about trying to teach at a paralegal school to make some extra money, but then I remembered I went to law school at night and going from my day job to school until 10pm every night kind of sucked.

Good luck!

Believe it or not, FPLC and the Boston schools are about the same distance from me (both are about an hour).

I did the work during the day, go to school at night thing too. But my class only meets once a week, and only for two months. Plus, I have been interested in teaching for a LONG time. The way I see it, this is jsut a way to get my foot in the door. In a couple of years, I'll try to leverage the experience into a full professorship at one of the nearby schools.
 
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