Uh-Oh.....I need advice on *gulp* engagement rings...

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Lifer
Oct 19, 2000
17,860
4
81
Well, well, well, I hate to even ask this, but I need some advice from some of the more knowledgable men out there on ATOT. Me and my girlfriend have been together for the better part of 2 1/2 years now (a couple of hiccups along the way), but I'm more in love with her now than I ever have been :D. I've been giving it some thought over the past couple of months (plus she has been laying down some hints), and I know that this is what I want to do. I want to propose to her on Christmas.

Now, I know some of you guys are gonna try and talk me out of it :))), but my mind is pretty much set. But if there's one thing I don't know, it's engagement rings. That, and the fact that I want to make sure I get something very nice. I want to get something she can show off, cause I know that's what women like to do with their engagement rings.

The only things I know: she likes gold better than silver, and my budget will probably top out at around $500. I only make $9 an hour, so I hope some of you out there don't think I'm cheap. Like I said, I don't know anything about this, including how much is too much, what kind of money I'll be looking at, etc.

Can any of you guys give me some suggestions on what to look for? What most ladies like? And especially of all, any of you female ATOTers out there have any suggestions? And oh yes, you know I'll be back in a month of two asking for suggestions on how to pop the question ;).

EDIT: Forgot to add, if you want pics, check out the second link down in my sig. They're on that site somewhere :).
 
S

shopbruin

Diamond Member
Jul 12, 2000
5,817
0
0
if your budget is only $500, i'd get as nice of a ring as possible, but maybe later on look into getting her a better one (as a surprise, don't necessarily promise her.)

costco has some rings on the lower end.

think about what she would like. if she likes gold, go for it. think if you want just yellow gold or pure gold (pure gold, ie 18k looks a lot darker and richer than yellow gold, but yellow gold is a lot brighter.)

diamond wise you won't be able to get the nicest diamond for her, at that budget. you may want to try a local jeweler, if you have any friends that have ties to jewelry that would be your absolute best bet as the markup is pretty high.

you could try ebay also - some people who get jilted turn to there to sell their rings off. there are also some decent deals jewelry wise there.
 
C

conjur

No Lifer
Jun 7, 2001
58,686
3
0
search this forum on diamonds and the DeBeers monopoly on them.

Seek out some a synthetic diamond ring.

Better yet....DON'T DO IT, MAN!!



:D
 
R

RU482

Lifer
Apr 9, 2000
12,689
3
81
Christmas is a great time to do it. I proposed to my wife on Christmas eve in front of her whole family....totally blew her away!!

I would suggest finding a diamond broker. They usually do not have retail outlets, you just have to be "in the know" (or know how to pick up the yellow pages). My brother in law introduced me to a broker after my local jewler "lost" the ring I intended to buy. And I am so glad he did. I don't remember the exact specsof the diamond, but the ring I almost paid $xxxx.xx at the jewler.... EDIT---just remembered wife lurks here too....I paid $xxxx.xx for at the broker...in fact, It was a better rock with the ring I really wanted to get her. (plus the rock was laser etched and GIA graded)

have fun with it. go to the mall stores and totally mess with the people there. It's educational. You'll also find used car salesmen are #2 on the "biggest scum of the sales world" list
 
rh71

rh71

No Lifer
Aug 28, 2001
52,844
1,049
126
Ouch $500... I don't know if it's worth it to spend that amt of money on a ring ... better to have some kind of more meaningful symbol of your relationship/affection/etc. given to her then while you pop the question and do an I-owe-you type deal when you can finally afford something better.

When you can afford a grand or two at the very minimum is when you should think about a real engagement ring... you're not doing her any favors having her "show off" a $500 ring. Do something else to mark the occasion in the meantime.

But to answer your question about rings... there are plenty of guides that tell you about the 4 "C"s when choosing a diamond... you must understand Clarity vs. Color above all else... but to put it bluntly... you will need more $ to spend on it first.
 
K

KokomoGST

Diamond Member
Nov 13, 2001
3,758
0
0
Check out some of the anti-DeBeers threads we've had on ATOT... diamonds are quite a bit overpriced thanks to DeBeers. Not to mention there's a lot of "blood" on those simple gems.

$500 I'd possibly consider looking for a unique gold ring since she likes gold.

 
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Lifer
Oct 19, 2000
17,860
4
81
Wow, are you guys serious about $500 not being enough to get a nice ring? I guess I was WAY off in my thinking. There's no way I don't think I could ever toss down more than a grand on a ring. I was trying to justify $500 :). But I don't think my girl is that shallow to want something better in the long-run. I'm sure she'll like whatever I get her.

So what am I looking at though? Are diamonds usually the go-to stone on engagement rings? Should I not think about anything else besides diamonds? And if so, what kind of carat am I looking at with my price range? 1/4, 1/3, 1/2? I'm completely clueless at this stuff.
 
F

flot

Diamond Member
Feb 24, 2000
3,197
0
0
Woodchuck, the "going rate" for an engagement ring is approximately 2 *months* of *your* salary.

So if hypothetically you made $50,000 the going rate for an engagement ring is somewhere in the $6000-$10,000 range.

Don't beat your self up about it, but $9 an hour is $18k a year... it would not be unreasonable for you to buy a $1000-$1500 ring.

And while I'm sure that $$ may strike you as somewhat absurd, I had the (friendly) argument with my gf the other day that I thought $15,000 was a bit much for an engagement ring. She disagreed.

Go figure. :confused:
 
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Lifer
Oct 19, 2000
17,860
4
81
Originally posted by: flot
Woodchuck, the "going rate" for an engagement ring is approximately 2 *months* of *your* salary.

So if hypothetically you made $50,000 the going rate for an engagement ring is somewhere in the $6000-$10,000 range.

Don't beat your self up about it, but $9 an hour is $18k a year... it would not be unreasonable for you to buy a $1000-$1500 ring.

And while I'm sure that $$ may strike you as somewhat absurd, I had the (friendly) argument with my gf the other day that I thought $15,000 was a bit much for an engagement ring. She disagreed.

Go figure. :confused:
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Holy sh!t dude. I really think my girlfriend would kick my ass if I spent even a $1000 on a ring. She's really down to earth, and I really think she would truely like whatever I got her. I plan on talking to her sister sometime soon, too, and see what she says. Need I mention I bought my gf a $100 bracelet one time, and she lost it? I'd be about afraid to spend $1000 on a ring ;).
 
D

DevilsAdvocate

Banned
Jul 1, 2000
10,274
2
0
Don't listen to DeBeers salary guidelines.

My wife's set me back $2000, with tax.

You might consider a synthetic diamond. That may be your best option.
 
A

Antisocial Virge

Diamond Member
Dec 13, 1999
6,578
0
0
Originally posted by: flot
Woodchuck, the "going rate" for an engagement ring is approximately 2 *months* of *your* salary.

So if hypothetically you made $50,000 the going rate for an engagement ring is somewhere in the $6000-$10,000 range.

Don't beat your self up about it, but $9 an hour is $18k a year... it would not be unreasonable for you to buy a $1000-$1500 ring.

And while I'm sure that $$ may strike you as somewhat absurd, I had the (friendly) argument with my gf the other day that I thought $15,000 was a bit much for an engagement ring. She disagreed.

Go figure. :confused:
Click to expand...


Yea, pretty sure the "guidelines" are from the diamond industry.
 
F

flot

Diamond Member
Feb 24, 2000
3,197
0
0
I've never seen a girl kick a guy's ass for buying her too expensive a piece of jewlery. :D

As for the pricing in general, I agree it's insane... but I guess the logic goes that you're only buying an engagement ring once. And if you can afford a $100 bracelet as a gift, well, how many bracelets would you give your girlfriend over your lifetime? Ok, and how many engagement rings are you giving her?

Talk to friends/family who have gotten married recently / are in similar situations and see what they've done...
 
J

Jzero

Lifer
Oct 10, 1999
18,834
1
0
Originally posted by: WoodchuckCharlie
Wow, are you guys serious about $500 not being enough to get a nice ring? I guess I was WAY off in my thinking. There's no way I don't think I could ever toss down more than a grand on a ring. I was trying to justify $500 :). But I don't think my girl is that shallow to want something better in the long-run. I'm sure she'll like whatever I get her.

So what am I looking at though? Are diamonds usually the go-to stone on engagement rings? Should I not think about anything else besides diamonds? And if so, what kind of carat am I looking at with my price range? 1/4, 1/3, 1/2? I'm completely clueless at this stuff.
Click to expand...

Holy God. I'm looking at $4000 - $5000 and I thought I was being frugal.
Generally diamond is the "traditional" stone, but if your gf doesn't care then why should you? $500 wouldn't get you much diamond. Maybe 1/4 carat. Except you still have to buy the setting, which will cost you another few hundred.
If she's happy with just a gold ring or something like that....
It's between you and her.
 
A

Alchemist99

Golden Member
Oct 15, 2002
1,172
0
0
Well you can get her something nice for around five hundred you'll just have to put it all into the diamond.
Just set it in a traditional solitaire mounting they are relatively inexpensive then down the road you can both
pay to have that diamond set into something you both like. I found lots of 1/3 carats on blue nile for around 400 to 450
thats a nice size and appropriate for your budget. Good luck

Just pm me if you have questions I'm "in the biz"
 
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Lifer
Oct 19, 2000
17,860
4
81
Originally posted by: Alchemist99
Well you can get her something nice for around five hundred you'll just have to put it all into the diamond.
Just set it in a traditional solitaire mounting they are relatively inexpensive then down the road you can both
pay to have that diamond set into something you both like. I found lots of 1/3 carats on blue nile for around 400 to 450
thats a nice size and appropriate for your budget. Good luck

Just pm me if you have questions I'm "in the biz"
Click to expand...
That actually sounds like a great idea. But what are 1/3 carats on blue nile? I'm not familiar with the blue nile part.
 
Zebo

Zebo

Elite Member
Jul 29, 2001
39,398
19
81
All i can say is wow. I did'nt realise it was this common to get anything other than a gold band. But I've been married awile ...so long in fact I don't even wear my ring.
 
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