Top Gear hilarity ... driving through Alabama

[dud]

Season 9, episode 3 of Top Gear involved the three co-hosts flying to Miami. A better description is provided here:

"In this 'American special', Jeremy, James and Richard are on a fly-drive holiday with a difference. Instead of hiring a car, each has to buy a car for no more than $1000. Starting in Miami, they travel through Mississippi and Alabama - where they manage to upset the locals - and end their journey in New Orleans. As usual, there will be some Top Gear challenges along the way; a dead cow, prostitute-obsessed truckers and a meeting with Fat Stig - Stig's American cousin. "


I almost died laughing when one of their "challenges" was to try to get one of their co-hosts killed by writing insults on the other's vehicles (as they drove through Alabama). The insults included:

"NASCAR sucks"
"Man-love rules"
"I'm Bi"
"Country and Western music is rubbish"
"Hillary for president"

Needless to say they almost get themselves killed as they stop for "petrol". I highly recommend watching it ... if you have not seen it already.

 

[exdeath]

I'm insulted by the last one. We don't need Stalin reincarnate running this country. I'd rather have an incompetent monkey that gets us nowhere and does absolutely nothing than someone who thinks they have a mandate to take from me and give to everyone else.


And I'm not even wealthy or rich by any means, just an above average working citizen who is responsible and can take care of myself. I want nothing from anyone and I will keep what I have earned with my own labor by any means necessary. I don't care if some poor crack whore can't afford lippo, thats not my problem. I don't care that illegals can't afford Tylenol for their kids because they spend my money on beer, car amps, and dubs, again not my problem.

(sorry off topic and more for P&N but the focus of the post here is politically loaded)

 

[Arkaign]

I saw that, and it was funny, but I thought it a real shame that they focused so completely negatively on the states. They didn't drive any nice American cars, they didn't drive any nice American roads, they merely visited the armpit of our country. Of course, Jeremy Clarkson admittedly hates the USA, so what can you expect. At least Top Gear is still a fun show to watch.

 

[dud]

The Top Gear folks wrote "Hillary for president" on the side of one of the cars becasue that part of Alababma is HEAVILY republican and anti democrat (i.e. Hillary Clinton). It really pissed off the locals.

 

[exdeath]

Originally posted by: dud
The Top Gear folks wrote "Hillary for president" on the side of one of the cars becasue that part of Alababma is HEAVILY republican and anti democrat (i.e. Hillary Clinton). It really pissed off the locals.

I'd want to question allowing the continued existence of anyone who would support Hillary for president. In my mind they are stingy communist bastards that have their eyes on my prizes for themselves and the historically socialist illegal Latin Americans that support them, all while trying to make me feel better about it by claiming it's "for the children" and "the poor". Income redistribution by any other name is still communism and fundamentally theft.

While they are entitled to their opinion and free to donate their own time and income to their proclaimed causes, those ideologies have no place as United States national public policy.

And while vehemently not a Democrat, I hardly consider myself Republican these days either.

 

[Arkaign]

Originally posted by: exdeath

Originally posted by: dud
The Top Gear folks wrote "Hillary for president" on the side of one of the cars becasue that part of Alababma is HEAVILY republican and anti democrat (i.e. Hillary Clinton). It really pissed off the locals.

I'd want to question allowing the continued existence of anyone who would support Hillary for president. In my mind they are stingy communist bastards that have their eyes on my prizes for themselves and the historically socialist illegal Latin Americans that support them, all while trying to make me feel better about it by claiming it's "for the children" and "the poor". Income redistribution by any other name is still communism and fundamentally theft.

And while vehemently not a Democrat, I hardly consider myself Republican these days either.

Ok, I think both the Bushes and Clintons should go to hell, but let's cap the personal politics on this one, and discuss either Top Gear or cars.

 

[Demon-Xanth]

P/N is that way
<--

As I've stated when this was originally posted, those people need to learn what is obviously a joke.

 

[Zenmervolt]

Yeah, and if I drove through Britain with a car that had "SOCCER SUCKS" and "ENGLISH ARE POOFTERS" spraypainted all over it, I'd probably get my arse kicked too.

Honestly, why any grown adult would find something like this surprising or amusing is beyond me. It's like going up to a stranger, calling his mother a whore, and then claiming that the resultant anger from that person is his normal state. It's absolutely ridiculous.

ZV

 

[Arkaign]

Originally posted by: Zenmervolt
Yeah, and if I drove through Britain with a car that had "SOCCER SUCKS" and "ENGLISH ARE POOFTERS" spraypainted all over it, I'd probably get my arse kicked too.

Honestly, why any grown adult would find something like this surprising or amusing is beyond me. It's like going up to a stranger, calling his mother a whore, and then claiming that the resultant anger from that person is his normal state. It's absolutely ridiculous.

ZV

Heh, in Britain, they'd be like 'what's soccer'?

Now "FOOTBALL SUCKS", that would get you 187 status.

 

[foghorn67]

Originally posted by: Zenmervolt
Yeah, and if I drove through Britain with a car that had "SOCCER SUCKS" and "ENGLISH ARE POOFTERS" spraypainted all over it, I'd probably get my arse kicked too.

Honestly, why any grown adult would find something like this surprising or amusing is beyond me. It's like going up to a stranger, calling his mother a whore, and then claiming that the resultant anger from that person is his normal state. It's absolutely ridiculous.

ZV

AGREED. Top Gear is a perfect example of British snobbery. Amazing how their fans think it's a smart episode to watch.

 

[Zenmervolt]

Originally posted by: Arkaign

Originally posted by: Zenmervolt
Yeah, and if I drove through Britain with a car that had "SOCCER SUCKS" and "ENGLISH ARE POOFTERS" spraypainted all over it, I'd probably get my arse kicked too.

Honestly, why any grown adult would find something like this surprising or amusing is beyond me. It's like going up to a stranger, calling his mother a whore, and then claiming that the resultant anger from that person is his normal state. It's absolutely ridiculous.

ZV

Heh, in Britain, they'd be like 'what's soccer'?

Now "FOOTBALL SUCKS", that would get you 187 status.

Considering that the term "soccer" originated in England as a slag abbreviation of "Association football" (from the abbreviation of "association" as "assoc"), I'm thinking that they would know. Plus, choosing the phrase "SOCCER SUCKS" would not only piss off the sports fans, but also the pedants.

ZV

 

[exdeath]

Originally posted by: foghorn67

Originally posted by: Zenmervolt
Yeah, and if I drove through Britain with a car that had "SOCCER SUCKS" and "ENGLISH ARE POOFTERS" spraypainted all over it, I'd probably get my arse kicked too.

Honestly, why any grown adult would find something like this surprising or amusing is beyond me. It's like going up to a stranger, calling his mother a whore, and then claiming that the resultant anger from that person is his normal state. It's absolutely ridiculous.

ZV

AGREED. Top Gear is a perfect example of British snobbery. Amazing how their fans think it's a smart episode to watch.

Yeah, you could stick a DOHC engine in a Z06 without telling them and let them test it, and they will talk smack about "ancient low tech push rods" etc. :roll:

Their comments and comparisons between European and American cars is more about boasting and national pride and joining the anti-American bandwagon more often than it has any relevance to the performance of the car itself.

I mean seriously if you put a M5 engine in a Z06 and a LS7 in a M5, and set the power output and rev limiters accordingly, they wouldn't be able to tell the difference but they would be regurgitating their talking points about how the BMW has "higher technology" and "superior engineering" and "more advanced and refined engines" and I'd I love to see the foot in mouth action that would ensue when you pop the hood on both.

Also they talk about HP/L and efficient engineering so much... but they are such hypocrites. Americans are inefficient and have inferior technology because we increase displacement in order to make power while BMW uses "engineering" to make power with smaller engines.

Yet when the M3 goes from a I6 to a increased displacement V8 it's a gift from god himself. Why didn't they keep the I6 and just apply more of their "ultimate engineering" ?

Or another beefy LSx based GM car comes out and you hear the cries "oh great another dinosaur gas guzzling irresponsible global warming causing American tank with a lump of iron push rod truck engine, do we really need that with gas prices and global warming?".

Yet Mercedes comes out with a 6,000 LB AMG with a huge 6L V8 engine that gets 9 mpg and again, its a gift from god that burbles heavenly when you start it.

:roll::roll::roll:

It's that saying that every country in the world makes the best cheese if you are from that country.

 

[GoatMonkey]

I actually enjoy Top Gear most of the time. I do have issues with their attitude on some things. Especially American cars.

I watched their review of the current Corvette. They start off by talking about how antiquated the suspension is. Then the next thing you know, they're talking about how great the ride and handling are. I can see complaining about the interior a little. It could use some improvement, but it's really not that bad for the price.

Then there's the video where Jeremy is driving the V-6 Mustang Convertible with an automatic transmission, the absolute worst performing variation you can get. Then he talks about it having 300hp, obviously not true from a V6. He talks about slow times around the track. Duh, it's heavy, underpowered, automatic. If you're going to bitch about it, at least get the V8 manual coupe and bitch about that.

I enjoy the reviews of all the cars I'll most likely never be able to afford. The celebs in a junker is always good. Some of the special routines they do are good. I liked the search for the best road in Europe bit.

Overall, it's a great show but sometimes a bit closed-minded.

 

[exdeath]

Originally posted by: GoatMonkey
I actually enjoy Top Gear most of the time. I do have issues with their attitude on some things. Especially American cars.

I watched their review of the current Corvette. They start off by talking about how antiquated the suspension is. Then the next thing you know, they're talking about how great the ride and handling are. I can see complaining about the interior a little. It could use some improvement, but it's really not that bad for the price.

Then there's the video where Jeremy is driving the V-6 Mustang Convertible with an automatic transmission, the absolute worst performing variation you can get. Then he talks about it having 300hp, obviously not true from a V6. He talks about slow times around the track. Duh, it's heavy, underpowered, automatic. If you're going to bitch about it, at least get the V8 manual coupe and bitch about that.

I enjoy the reviews of all the cars I'll most likely never be able to afford. The celebs in a junker is always good. Some of the special routines they do are good. I liked the search for the best road in Europe bit.

Overall, it's a great show but sometimes a bit closed-minded.

Yeah it's great when they compare a base level $10,000 Mustang with a well equipped $35,000 BMW and then complain about the lower quality. I guess everyone in Europe drives BMWs and McLaren F1s and there is no such thing as an economy car or lower budget in Europe. Snobbery at its finest.

Or nit pick and scrutinize how much a mini van or Malibu sucks because it's .91g's doesn't compare to the Enzo's .92g's (just making numbers up) like every car out there should be held to the standards of a million dollar supercar. Then you get F&TF teenager types who idolize Formula 1 cars and think that a car with a solid axle, or any American car by nature of being American, can't stay on the road... despite the fact that a soccer mom driving a Sebring isn't ever going to be pulling 10g's on the Nürburgring.

What is ironic is that American companies like Ford are among the top selling vehicles in Europe.

 

[BigLar]

Originally posted by: exdeath
I'm insulted by the last one. We don't need Stalin reincarnate running this country. I'd rather have an incompetent monkey that gets us nowhere and does absolutely nothing than someone who thinks they have a mandate to take from me and give to everyone else.


And I'm not even wealthy or rich by any means, just an above average working citizen who is responsible and can take care of myself. I want nothing from anyone and I will keep what I have earned with my own labor by any means necessary. I don't care if some poor crack whore can't afford lippo, thats not my problem. I don't care that illegals can't afford Tylenol for their kids because they spend my money on beer, car amps, and dubs, again not my problem.

(sorry off topic and more for P&N but the focus of the post here is politically loaded)

"We hold these Truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal..."

 

[exdeath]

Originally posted by: BigLar

"We hold these Truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal..."

Created equal and not to be discriminated against with equal opportunity or treatment or protection under the law. But not guaranteed to be equal in economic success in a game of chance.

"establish Justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defense, promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty"

It's promote the general welfare, not insure it, not establish it, or provide for it, but promote.

And "secure the Blessings of Liberty" implying the right to life and free will and and the fruits of ones own labor of free will without interference from others.

 

[Arkaign]

Originally posted by: exdeath

Originally posted by: GoatMonkey
I actually enjoy Top Gear most of the time. I do have issues with their attitude on some things. Especially American cars.

I watched their review of the current Corvette. They start off by talking about how antiquated the suspension is. Then the next thing you know, they're talking about how great the ride and handling are. I can see complaining about the interior a little. It could use some improvement, but it's really not that bad for the price.

Then there's the video where Jeremy is driving the V-6 Mustang Convertible with an automatic transmission, the absolute worst performing variation you can get. Then he talks about it having 300hp, obviously not true from a V6. He talks about slow times around the track. Duh, it's heavy, underpowered, automatic. If you're going to bitch about it, at least get the V8 manual coupe and bitch about that.

I enjoy the reviews of all the cars I'll most likely never be able to afford. The celebs in a junker is always good. Some of the special routines they do are good. I liked the search for the best road in Europe bit.

Overall, it's a great show but sometimes a bit closed-minded.

Yeah it's great when they compare a base level $10,000 Mustang with a well equipped $35,000 BMW and then complain about the lower quality. I guess everyone in Europe drives BMWs and McLaren F1s and there is no such thing as an economy car or lower budget in Europe. Snobbery at its finest.

Or nit pick and scrutinize how much a mini van or Malibu sucks because it's .91g's doesn't compare to the Enzo's .92g's (just making numbers up) like every car out there should be held to the standards of a million dollar supercar. Then you get F&TF teenager types who idolize Formula 1 cars and think that a car with a solid axle, or any American car by nature of being American, can't stay on the road... despite the fact that a soccer mom driving a Sebring isn't ever going to be pulling 10g's on the Nürburgring.

What is ironic is that American companies like Ford are among the top selling vehicles in Europe.

UK Fords are much better than US Fords, historically, IMHO. Agreed on the blatant, repetitive, and often mindless anti-US slant on the show. It's a well-produced, slick, interesting show, with fantastic cars (Veyron, Koenigsegg, and so on) that are awesome to see put to the test in that kind of situation. I think a convertible Mustang V6 is $25kish, no? I could be wrong, but you're right, they do some really unfair competitions. Recently, Clarkson (seems to be the originator of all the American hating), compared a 300 SRT edition to an M5 in a drag race. Well, the M5 owned the hell out of the 300, which was obvious even before the race started, and Jeremy started cackling about it. It was really quite ridiculous. Hell, I prefer the M5, but if you're comparing a $35-$40k 300, then compare it against a $35-$40k 5-series, which would be what, a 530i? See who wins *THAT* race, Jeremy!

bah.

I still love the show, warts and all. You just have to take Clarkson's blather with a block of salt.

 

[exdeath]

Heh, it's not the show that bothers me so much, I can understand the nationalism with any show originating from another country, that's fine. It's all the F&F type kids here in the states that actually believe what he says and think they know what they are talking about because they saw it on Top Gear, that bother me. They think an engine is intrinsically better if it's smaller and revs higher and actually think that a 18k red line in a street car is practical, because 'it's cool' and technologically advanced because thats how F1 does it. They will yap on and on about variable valve timing and overhead cams and all that stuff, but they wouldn't know a valve lifter or hydraulic tappet if it was laid out in front of them.

If you try to ask them why one is better than the other when you present two different engines, a 7L push rod engine and a 4L DOHC engine, both with the same size, weight, power, and mileage, and they just keep puking up the same "well its more advanced engineering and HP/L blah blah blah"

I got into a stupid debate with one of these kinds of people after he commented about a how "its neat that you can see where the pistons are" on the new Skyline... I don't know how you see the pistons at the top of the engine bay of a DOHC V6... I believe he thought the discretely shaped fat intake runners in the upper intake had the pistons inside them or something. Also had someone debating with me how European engines were better and I busted him when he said something about the LS2 being a two cam 2 valve engine... and these are the people going around telling everyone else which cars to buy and propagating ignorant bias about other cars, particularly American.

 

[GoatMonkey]

Originally posted by: exdeath
Heh, it's not the show that bothers me so much, I can understand the nationalism with any show originating from another country, that's fine. It's all the F&F type kids here in the states that actually believe what he says and think they know what they are talking about because they saw it on Top Gear, that bother me. They think an engine is intrinsically better if it's smaller and revs higher and actually think that a 18k red line in a street car is practical, because 'it's cool' and technologically advanced because thats how F1 does it.

If you try to ask them why one is better than the other when you present two different engines, a 7L push rod engine and a 4L DOHC engine, both with the same size, weight, power, and mileage, and they just keep puking up the same "well its more advanced engineering and HP/L blah blah blah"

You must think I'm nuts then. I follow F1 and I like big V8s. I have no problem with small high power engines either. But a big push rod V8 is still a great engine.

 

[exdeath]

Originally posted by: GoatMonkey

You must think I'm nuts then. I follow F1 and I like big V8s. I have no problem with small high power engines either. But a big push rod V8 is still a great engine.

Nah, I like a little of everything too. I wish I could have a 2003 M3 and a 1998 Supra Turbo next to my Cobra but I can't afford all three at the moment.

I just can't stand people that profess one single thing as the best because their favorite overpriced status symbol happens to implement it that way. Particularly when I start to become surrounded by the hate America for being America train because they spin it that way and propagate misinformation and bias.

So sick of seeing a car review online, and the first comment I see, before they even read the performance review or looked at the specs, I see the familiar stuff "eww push rods in 2007?" or "rusted I beam girder suspension" or "only 50 HP/L?" or somehow the RWD that we've had for 100 years is unsafe and deadly and can't stay on the road...

Every now and then, you catch someone and prove just how biased this crowd is when you have someone that thinks the Mustang still uses a large displacement push rod V8... then they try to move on to attack the suspension, and I have to inform them that the Cobra's and GTOs and Chargers are all IRS, even AWD with the Charger RT, and still cost less... and you can sense them struggling trying to find something else to criticize.

Interior attention to detail is pretty much the only thing I can't defend in most cases and I ignore purely subjective opinions on styling

 

[ultimatebob]

You gotta feel pity for the British... their nation used to be important, ya know

Out of curiosity... are their ANY independent British automakers left, or have they all been bought out by foreign conglomerates now?

 

[The Boston Dangler]

Originally posted by: ultimatebob
You gotta feel pity for the British... their nation used to be important, ya know

Out of curiosity... are their ANY independent British automakers left, or have they all been bought out by foreign conglomerates now?

lotus, i think mclaren is still technically separate from DC, and, ummmmm, is morgan still making those silly wooden cars?

i'm a big top gear fan, but i take the show for what it is: entertainment. yes, it's more scripted than they try to let on, and the video production can be over-the-top, but at least it's not out-and-out fake. they really do drive the shit out of those cars (i know when i drive on the beach at low tide, the car is at least $60,000, and someone elses ). the car versus plane, et cetera races are real, but most of what ends up on tv is from a second trip. most of all, i like the way they say whatever the f they want to.

i'm certainly no videographer, but i would like to visit england to make a film. i'll find the dumbest, most stereotypical brits, with the worst teeth, most indecypherable of accents, drunken football hooligans, and so on. maybe i'll stalk clarkson while i'm there.

 

[GoatMonkey]

Here are the independent ones I can think of...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/TVR

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Noble_Automotive_Ltd

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ariel_Ltd

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Morgan_Motor_Company

 

[ElFenix]

Originally posted by: exdeath

Yeah, you could stick a DOHC engine in a Z06 without telling them and let them test it, and they will talk smack about "ancient low tech push rods" etc. :roll:

Their comments and comparisons between European and American cars is more about boasting and national pride and joining the anti-American bandwagon more often than it has any relevance to the performance of the car itself.

it's doubly ironic considering that the british car industry is owned by yanks, krauts, and the chinese.


the worst bit of anti-americanism top gear ever did was hooking up a GT500 to a dyno. it made ~450 hp. at the wheels. so, they claimed it didn't live up to its 500 hp billing. i've been watching pretty religiously for several years now, and it was the only car they've dyno'ed in that time.

 

[exdeath]

450 at the wheels would actually be a little over 500 HP... but I can understand if it was their first and only dyno and they didn't understand wheel HP vs crank HP...

On the other hand I could see them easily knowing better and pulling something like that anyway knowing that most of the people that watch are the ignorant masses that will go on and propagate that crap as gospel.