This ones for you JohnnyGuru, and all you other support guys.

[Locutus of Board]

I work in support.Where I work we have a web based interaction suite, and support over the web. The name of the company and my email have been edited to protect the not so innocent.
BTW-I don't work with end-users. They are supposed to be NT professionals.
Where you see "You say" that's me!


You say, winmsd
Stupid customer says, and where do I find winmsd?
You say, Go to start, run, type winmsd.
You say, Print all tabs to a file. Zip up the event logs and winmsd and send to support@mycompany.com
Stupid customer says, I get cannot find the file 'type'
You say, ?
Stupid customer says, never mind, I thought you meant "type winmsd"

 

[Locutus of Board]

Let's see if this warrants a comment second time around.

 

[jonnyGURU]

...like when I say to someone "Type FORMAT space C: space /S" and they actually type in "FORMAT SPACE C COLON SPACE SLASH S".

So help me God, I am not lying.

 

[Locutus of Board]

GURU!

Good to see ya!

 

[Viper GTS]

...Or when you say "OK, let's pull the 2100" and before you can say "Shut down your computer, power it off, THEN remove the 2100" they've already reached inside their RUNNING computer, & yanked out the PCI device...

Viper GTS

 

[RSI]

LMFAO these are always funny

 

[yakko]

How about when you say right click on the desktop and they say hold on let me find a pen.

 

[jonnyGURU]

How about when they call for an RMA number and then when you are ready to give it to them they tell you to hold on so they can get a pen....

I'm like... "Wait a minute! YOU called ME!"

 

[reitz]

johnnyGURU, I had a user last night type in the 'find' window ASTERISK DOT C A B

One of my most frequent:

me: Click once with the right mouse button on your connection icon, and choose 'properties' from the menu that pops up.

user: OK

me: Do you see the 'server types' tab at the top?

user: No, I just see Conection to... and my username and password.

me: No, the RIGHT mouse button.

user: OK...same thing

AAAARRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!

When I rule the world, all mouse buttons will come pre-labeled with an 'R' and an 'L'.

 

[jonnyGURU]

Heaven forbid they get their hands on accessibility options and change the mouse buttons Left and Right! DOH!

 

[Viper GTS]

What about one of dem new fangled 6 buttoned mouses? Den whadda we do?



Viper GTS

 

[reitz]

Take it away from them. Anyone who doesn't know the difference between right and left really should be using a one-button Imac anyway.

 

[yakko]

If you give them a one button Icrac then they will lose the mouse.