- Oct 6, 2000
- 5,872
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This may have already been posted but it made me grin.
WHO IS JACK SCHITT?
For some time many of us have wondered
just who is Jack Schitt? We find ourselves
at a loss when someone says, "You don't
know Jack Schitt!" Well, thanks to
genealogy efforts, you can now respond
in an intellectual way.
Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt.
Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married
O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep N. Schitt, Inc.
They had one son, Jack.
In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt. The
deeply religious couple produced six children:
Holie Schitt, Giva Schitt, Fulla Schitt,
Bull Schitt, and the twins Deap Schitt and
Dip Schitt. Against her parents' objections,
Deap Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school
dropout.
After being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt
divorced. Noe Schitt later married Ted Sherlock,
and, because her kids were living with them, she
wanted to keep her previous name. She was then
known as Noe Schitt Sherlock.
Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt, and they
produced a son with a rather nervous disposition
named Chicken Schitt. Two of the other six children,
Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, were inseparable
throughout childhood and subsequently married the
Happens brothers in a dual ceremony. The wedding
announcement in the newspaper announced the
Schitt-Happens nuptials.
The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and
Hoarse. Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to
tour the world. He recently returned from Italy with
his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt.
Now when someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt,
" you can correct them.
Sincerely,
Crock O. Schitt
WHO IS JACK SCHITT?
For some time many of us have wondered
just who is Jack Schitt? We find ourselves
at a loss when someone says, "You don't
know Jack Schitt!" Well, thanks to
genealogy efforts, you can now respond
in an intellectual way.
Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt.
Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married
O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep N. Schitt, Inc.
They had one son, Jack.
In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt. The
deeply religious couple produced six children:
Holie Schitt, Giva Schitt, Fulla Schitt,
Bull Schitt, and the twins Deap Schitt and
Dip Schitt. Against her parents' objections,
Deap Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school
dropout.
After being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt
divorced. Noe Schitt later married Ted Sherlock,
and, because her kids were living with them, she
wanted to keep her previous name. She was then
known as Noe Schitt Sherlock.
Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt, and they
produced a son with a rather nervous disposition
named Chicken Schitt. Two of the other six children,
Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, were inseparable
throughout childhood and subsequently married the
Happens brothers in a dual ceremony. The wedding
announcement in the newspaper announced the
Schitt-Happens nuptials.
The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and
Hoarse. Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to
tour the world. He recently returned from Italy with
his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt.
Now when someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt,
" you can correct them.
Sincerely,
Crock O. Schitt
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