the perfect american president

[clamum]

David Palmer

Oh yeah. Jack Bauer as V.P. too.

 

[SP33Demon]

Frank Underwood.

 

[Childs]

Frank Underwood.

Man, thats like having Lex Luthor as president.

 

[PottedMeat]

Sideshow Bob

Your guilty conscience may move you to vote Democratic, but deep down you long for a cold-hearted Republican to lower taxes, brutalize criminals, and rule you like a king.

 

[Mai72]

Can you clone Bill Clinton?

There you go. The greatest president ever.

 

[BurnItDwn]

The best president for a black comedy could be any of those 3, ohh wait, they already made one.

For an actual real life president, you do not want a shadowy secretive type, you want full honest open disclosure and the least possible authoritanian. Id recommend Julian Assange.

 

[CoPhotoGuy]

Mike Rowe

 

[BurnItDwn]

Mike Rowe

hahaha, it is a dirty job, have to deal with the scummiest and most corrupt people in the civilized world....

 

[CoPhotoGuy]

hahaha, it is a dirty job, have to deal with the scummiest and most corrupt people in the civilized world....

I'm being serious. Ever read any of his responses to letters and such? I would vote for him in a second.

 

[rudeguy]

I'm being serious. Ever read any of his responses to letters and such? I would vote for him in a second.

I'd vote for him twice!

 

[BurnItDwn]

I'm being serious. Ever read any of his responses to letters and such? I would vote for him in a second.

Ohh, he is awesome indeed, and seems like he has a strong connection with reality. I think id vote for him too.

Im being serious too. Being president means you have to deal with politicians on a regular basis, it is a very dirty job, since by nature, politicians are as dirty and corrupt as a human can be.

 

[Printer Bandit]

aren't all presidents related to a crusty dead king from england? that should narrow down the pool.

 

[Humpy]

I imagine we could go a full 8 years without a president and things would be just fine.

If not then just some random dude would be OK too. My friend Scot is white and fat and pretty funny sometimes. I'm sure he's someone America would like to smoke a bowl and have a beer with.

My third choice would be Noodle, my cat.

 

[Grooveriding]

A shoo-in.

Edited for great justice!

 

[Humpy]

A shoe-in.

Perfect! Now just need to find a liberal candidate to run against "him".

 

[Perknose]

A shoe-in.

Please stop. PLEASE.

Shoo-in

The conventional spelling of the noun meaning a sure winner is shoo-in, not shoe-in. The term uses the verb shoo, which means to urge something in a desired direction, usually by waving one’s arms. The idea behind the word is that the person being shooed—for example, into the winner’s circle, into a job, or into a field of award nominees—is such a lock that we can shoo him or her in without hesitation.

The term originated in the early 20th century. The earliest instances relate to horse racing, with the shoo-ins being horses that are destined to win through either dominance or race fixing. The earliest instance listed in the OED is from 1928, and we are unable to find any examples from earlier. The word seems to have blown up in the 1930s, though, and historical Google News and Books searches uncover numerous examples from that decade and the 40s. By the 1960s it was in use outside horse racing.

Shoe-In or Shoo-In :

A race horse so fast that you can merely shoo it across the finish line rather than having to urge it on with stronger measures is a “shoo-in”: an easy winner.


It is particularly unfortunate when this expression is misspelled “shoe-in” because to “shoehorn” something in is to squeeze it in with great difficulty.

 

[Obsy]

Honey Badger

 

[brianmanahan]

Please stop. PLEASE.

perknose for president

 

[IronWing]

Please stop. PLEASE.

Nothing to throw a schoo over.

 

[John Connor]

Ben Carson!

 

[DesiPower]

Francis J. Underwood

 

[mikeford]

Funny how you never truly miss something until you don't have it anymore, like an intelligent president that cares about America. Ronald Reagan was good for America, and good for the world, what sad times have come upon us since.

 

[Grooveriding]

Our ex-mayor is available now. If his health improves you are welcome to him for the next commander in chief.

 

[norseamd]

Funny how you never truly miss something until you don't have it anymore, like an intelligent president that cares about America. Ronald Reagan was good for America, and good for the world, what sad times have come upon us since.

 

[norseamd]

Many futurists are horrible at predicting shit like Ray Kurzweil but Dr. Kahn was able to make many predictions with amazing accuracy.

The Year 2000

As you may know, I like old books of futurism. In the year 2008 I borrowed one such book from a friend: "The Year 2000: A Framework for Speculation on the Next Thirty-Three Years", by Herman Kahn and A. J. Wiener. It was published in 1967 and has many fascinating bits, but the easiest ones to demonstrate are these three tables of predictions near the beginning of the book. I've color-coded the predictions with my subjective impressions of whether each was a hit, a partial hit, or a miss. Out of 135 predictions there are 27 hits and 22 partial hits.
Table XVIII: One Hundred Technical Innovations Very Likely in the Last Third of the Twentieth Century

1. Multiple applications of lasers and masers for sensing, measuring, communication, cutting, heating, welding, power transmission, ilumination, destructive (defensive), and other purposes
2. Extreme high-strength and/or high-temperature structural materials
3. New or improved superperformance fabrics (papers, fibers, and plastics)
4. New or improved materials for equipment and appliances (plastic, glasses, alloys, ceramics, intermetallics, and cements)
5. New airborne vehicles (ground-effect machines, VTOL and STOL, super-helicopters, giant and/or supersonic jets)
6. Extensive commercial application of shaped-charge explosives
7. More reliable and longer-range weather forecasting
8. Intensive and/or extensive expansion of tropical agriculture and forestry
9. New sources of power for fixed installations (e.g., magnetohydrodynamic, thermionic and thermoelectric, and radioactivity)
10. New sources of power for ground transportation (storage battery, fuel cell, propulsion [or support] by electro-magnetic fields, jet engine, turbine, and the like)
11. Extensive and intensive use of high altitude cameras for mapping, prospecting, census, land use, and geological investigations
12. New methods of water transportation (such as large submarines, flexible and special purpose "container ships", or more extensive use of large automated single-purpose bulk cargo ships)
13. Major reduction in hereditary and congenital defects
14. Extensive use of cyborg techniques (mechanical aids or substitutes for human organs, senses, limbs, or other components)
15. New techniques for preserving or improving the environment
16. Relatively effective appetite and weight control
17. New techniques and institutions for adult education
18. New and useful plant and animal species
19. Human "hibernation" for short periods (hours or days) for medical purposes
20. Inexpensive design and procurement of "one of a kind" items through use of computerized analysis and automated production
21. Controlled and/or supereffective relaxation and sleep
22. More sophisticated architectural engineering (e.g., geodesic domes, "fancy" stressed shells, pressurized skins, and esoteric materials)
23. New or improved uses of the oceans (mining, extraction of minerals, controlled "farming," source of energy, and the like)
24. Three-dimensional photography, illustrations, movies, and television
25. Automated or more mechanized housekeeping and home maintenance
26. Widespread use of nuclear reactors for power
27. Use of nuclear explosives for excavation and mining, generation of power, creation of high temperature-high pressure environments, and/or as a source of neutrons or other radiation.
28. General use of automation and cybernation in management and production
29. Extensive and intensive centralization (or automatic interconnection) of current and past personal and business information in high-speed data processors
30. Other new and possibly pervasive techniques for surveillance, monitoring, and control of individuals and organizations
31. Some control of weather and/or climate
32. Other (permanent or temporary) changes--or experiments--with the overall environment (e.g., the "permanent" increate in C-14 and temporary creation of other radioactivity by nuclear explosions, the increasing generation of CO2 in the atmosphere, projects Starfire, West Ford, and Storm Fury)
33. New and more reliable "educational" and propaganda techniques for affecting human behavior--public and private
34. Practical use of direct electronic communication with and stuimulation of the brain
35. Human hibernation for relatively extensive periods (months to years)
36. Cheap and widely available central war weapons and weapon systems
37. New and relatively effective counterinsurgency techniques (and perhaps also insurgency techniques)
38. New techniques for very cheap, convenient, and reliable birth control
39. New, more varied, and more reliable drugs for control of fatigue, relaxation, alertness, mood, personality, perceptions, fantasies, and other psychobiological states
40. Capability to choose the sex of unborn children
41. Improved capability to "change" sex of children and/or adults
42. Other genetic control and/or influence over the "basic constitution" of an individual
43. New techniques and institutions for the education of children
44. General and substantial increase in life expectancy, postponement of aging, and limited rejuvenation
45. Generally acceptable and competitive synthetic foods and beverages (e.g., carbohydrates, fats, proteins, enzymes, vitamins, coffee, tea, cocoa, and alchoholic liquor)
46. "High Quality" medical care for undeveloped areas (e.g., use of medical aides and technicians, referral hospitals, broad spectrum antibiotics, and artificial blood plasma)
47. Design and extensive use of responsive and supercontrolled environments for private and public use (for pleasurable, educational, and vocational purposes) [I'm not really sure what this means. --LR]
48. Physically nonharmful methods of overindulging
49. Simple techniques for extensive and "permanent" cosmetological changes (features, "figures," perhaps complexion and even skin color, and even physique)
50. More extensive use of transplantation of human organs
51. Permanent manned satellite and lunar installations--interplanetary travel
52. Application of space life systems or similar techniques to terrestrial installations
53. Permanent inhabited undersea installations and perhaps even colonies
54. Automated grocery and department stores
55. Extensive use of robots and machines "slaved" to humans
56. New uses of underground "tunnels" for private and public transportation and other purposes
57. Automated universal (real time) credit, audit, and banking systems
58. Chemical methods for improving memory and learning
59. Greater use of underground buildings
60. New and improved materials and equipment for buildings and interiors (e.g., variable transmission glass, heating and cooling by thermoelectric effect, and electroluminescent and phosphorescent lighting
61. Widespread use of cryogenics
62. Improved chemical control of some mental illnesses and some aspects of senility
63. Mechanical and chemical methods for improving human analytical ability more or lress directly
64. Inexpensive and rapid techniques for making tunnels and underground cavities in earth and/or rock
65. Major improvements in earth moving and construction equipment generally
66. New techniques for keeping physically fit and/or acquiring physical skills
67. Commercial extraction of oil from shale
68. Recoverable boosters for economic space launching
69. Individual flying platforms
70. Simple inexpensive home video recording and playing
71. Inexpensive high-capacity, worldwide, regional, and local (home and business) communication (perhaps using satellites, lasers, and light pipes)
72. Practical home and business use of "wired" video communication for both telephone and TV (possibly including retrieval of taped material from libraries or other sources) and rapid transmission and reception of facsimiles (possibly including news, library material, commercial announcements, instantaneous mail delivery, other printouts, and so on)
73. Practical large-scale desalinization
74. Pervasic business use of computers for the storage, processing, and retrieval of information
75. Shared time (public and interconnected?) computers generally available to home and business on a metered basis
76. Other widespread use of computers for intellectual and professional assistance (translation, teaching, literature search, medical diagnosis, traffic control, crime detection, computation, design, analyis and to some degree as intellectual collaborator generally)
77. General availability of inexpensive transuranic and other esoteric elements
78. Space defense systems
79. Inexpensive and reasonably effective ground-based BMD [Ballistic Missile Defense -LR. "One way not to make a reputation is to find a hole in the airdefense system. It's all holes." --Herman Kahn]
80. Very low-cost buildings for home and business use
81. Personal "pagers" (perhaps even two-way pocket phones) and other personal electronic equipment for communication, computing, and data processing program
82. Direct broadcasts from satellites to home receivers
83. Inexpensive (less than $20, long lasting, very small battery operated TV receivers)
84. Home computer to "run" household and communicate with outside world
85. Maintenance-free, longlife electronic and other equipment
86. Home education via video and computerized and programmed learning
87. Stimulated and planned and perhaps programmed dreams
88. Inexpensive (less than one centa a page), rapid high-quality black and white reproduction; followed by color and high-detailed photography reproduction--perhaps for home as well as office use
89. Widespread use of improved fluid amplifiers [?? -LR]
90. Conference TV (both closed circuit and public communication system)
91. Flexible penology without necessarily using prisons (by use of modern methods of surveillance, monitoring, and control)
92. Common use of (longlived?) individual power source for lights, appliances, and machines
93. Inexpensive worldwide transportation of humans and cargo
94. Inexpensive road-free (and facility-free) transportation
95. New methods for rapid language teaching
96. Extensive genetic control for plants and animals
97. New biological and chemical methods to identify, trace, incapacitate, or annoy people for police and military uses
98. New and possibly very simple methods for lethal biological and chemical warfare
99. Artificial moons and other methods for lighting large areas at night
100. Extensive use of "biological processes" in the extraction and processing of minerals

Table XIX: Some Less Likely but Important Possiblities

These are all misses, except for #22, which I would classify as a partial hit due to the development of IVF.

1. "True" artificial intelligence
2. Practical use of sustained fusion to produce neutrons and/or energy
3. Artificial growth of new limbs and organs (either in situ or for later transplantation)
4. Room temperature superconductors
5. Major use of rockets for commercial of private transportation (either terrestrial or extraterrestrial)
6. Effective chemical or biological treatment for most mental ilnesses
7. Almost complete control of marginal changes in heredity
8. Suspended animation (for years or centuries)
9. Practical materials with nearly "theoretical limit" strength
10. Conversion of mammals (humans?) to fluid breahters
11. Direct input into human memory banks
12. Direct augmentation of human mental capacity by the mechanical or electrical interconnection of the brain with a computer
13. Major rejuvenation and/or significant extension of vigor and life span--say 100 to 150 years
14. Chemical or biological control of character or intelligence
15. Automated highways
16. Extensive use of moving sidewalks for local transporation
17. Substantial manned lunar or planetary installations
18. Electrical power available for less than .3 mill per kilowatt hour
19. Verification of some extrasensory phenomena
20. Planetary engineering
21. Modification of the solar system
22. Practical laboratory conception and nurturing of animal (human?) foetuses
23. Production of a drug equivalent to Huxley's soma
24. A technological equivalent of telepathy
25. Some direct control of individual thought processes

Table XX: Ten Far-Out Possibilities

The authors write: "We do not believe that any of them will occur by the year 2000, or perhaps ever. But some of them are discussed today; and such a list does emphasize the fact that some dramatic and radical innovation must be expected." A revealing statement. Most of the dramatic post-1968 innovations were correctly predicted on the first list. What wasn't predicted were the radical second-order effects of those innovations.
As you'd expect, all of these are misses, especially since most of them are more extreme versions of predictions from the previous list. (Though the authors might be surprised at how close #8 seems as of 2008.)

1. Life expectancy extended to substantially more than 150 years (immorality?)
2. Almost complete generic control (but still homo sapiens)
3. Major modification of human species (no longer homo sapiens)
4. Antigravity (or practical use of gravity waves)*
5. Interstellar travel
6. Electric power available for less than .03 mill per kw hour
7. Practical and routine use of extrasensory phenomena
8. Laboratory creation of artificial live plants and animals
9. Lifetime immunization against practically all diseases
10. Substantial lunar or planetary bases or colonies