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The Most Depressing Town in America

D

Dufman

Golden Member
I just moved to a small town in northern PA. I think I am the only young person, i am 23, here in town with a decent job. I work at a very large bank. Day in and day out, I see why the economy of this town is terrible. It is in the top 5% of towns in PA in several categories. Categories like teenage pregnancy, incest resulting in children, disability, welfare, and STD's per captia. It is down right nasty in this town.

I have only been here for a month, and I have yet to meet a young female townie who doesnt have kids. Just this past week, a 23 year old came in with her 8 year old kid. I know that teenage pregnancy happens, but my god it sucks here.

The only decent people in this town are the ones who are in college, but i am quickly growing out of my college years.

I think i am heading for a very lonely life. But hey, at least i make 65k a year...
 
back in the days when I was working in burger's king in brooklyn, I met this coworker with a 3 years old kid. she was 17y/o living with her bf.
 
Originally posted by: DaWhim
back in the days when I was working in burger's king in brooklyn, I met this coworker with a 3 years old kid. she was 17y/o living with her bf.
Click to expand...

That's my baby's mama!
 
Steps to a happy life in Northern PA:

1) Have sex with your sister
2) Get a job at a large bank to pay for child care
3) ...
4) PROFIT!!!!11
 
Originally posted by: jumpr
Steps to a happy life in Northern PA:

1) Have sex with your sister
2) Get a job at a large bank to pay for child care
3) ...
4) PROFIT!!!!11
Click to expand...

BBBUUURRNNN
 
Originally posted by: jumpr
Steps to a happy life in Northern PA:

1) Have sex with your sister
2) Get a job at a large bank to pay for child care
3) ...
4) PROFIT!!!!11
Click to expand...

i moved here, i am not from here. I dont follow the same practices
 
Originally posted by: jumpr
Steps to a happy life in Northern PA:

1) Have sex with your sister resulting in child
2) Get a job at a large bank to pay for child care while you screw your cousing
3) ...
4) PROFIT!!!!11
Click to expand...

fixed
 
Originally posted by: Dufman
Originally posted by: jumpr
Steps to a happy life in Northern PA:

1) Have sex with your sister
2) Get a job at a large bank to pay for child care
3) ...
4) PROFIT!!!!11
Click to expand...

i moved here, i am not from here. I dont follow the same practices
Click to expand...
I'm just trying to give you some tips to make for a happier life. 😉
 
Originally posted by: Dufman
Originally posted by: jumpr
Steps to a happy life in Northern PA:

1) Have sex with some random teenager
2) Get a job at a large bank to pay for child care
3) ...
4) PROFIT!!!!11
Click to expand...

i moved here, i am not from here. I dont follow the same practices
Click to expand...

Better?

 
Originally posted by: Dufman
Originally posted by: jumpr
Steps to a happy life in Northern PA:

1) Have sex with your sister
2) Get a job at a large bank to pay for child care
3) ...
4) PROFIT!!!!11
Click to expand...

i moved here, i am not from here. I dont follow the same practices
Click to expand...

Read below quote.

Originally posted by: DaTT
Looks like you have a little adjusting to do to "fit in"
Click to expand...
 
Originally posted by: Dufman
Originally posted by: jumpr
Steps to a happy life in Northern PA:

1) Have sex with your sister
2) Get a job at a large bank to pay for child care
3) ...
4) PROFIT!!!!11
Click to expand...

i moved here, i am not from here. I dont follow the same practices
Click to expand...

Which is even worse😛

We called the area between Pitts and Philly the blackhole, if you didn't leave as soon as you graduated college you usually ended up living there and that was the end of it.
 
Originally posted by: Dufman
Originally posted by: jumpr
Steps to a happy life in Northern PA:

1) Have sex with your sister
2) Get a job at a large bank to pay for child care
3) ...
4) PROFIT!!!!11
Click to expand...

i moved here, i am not from here. I dont follow the same practices
Click to expand...


When in Rome...
 
What town do you live in? There has got to be some hot chick you could meet. Afterall, don't you make enough money to attract them?
 
Originally posted by: Dufman
I just moved to a small town in northern PA. I think I am the only young person, i am 23, here in town with a decent job. I work at a very large bank. Day in and day out, I see why the economy of this town is terrible. It is in the top 5% of towns in PA in several categories. Categories like teenage pregnancy, incest resulting in children, disability, welfare, and STD's per captia. It is down right nasty in this town.

I have only been here for a month, and I have yet to meet a young female townie who doesnt have kids. Just this past week, a 23 year old came in with her 8 year old kid. I know that teenage pregnancy happens, but my god it sucks here.

The only decent people in this town are the ones who are in college, but i am quickly growing out of my college years.

I think i am heading for a very lonely life. But hey, at least i make 65k a year...
Click to expand...
get transferred asap
 
I guess the recurring theme here is that the locals will tell you that the best place to pick up chicks is at a family reunion.
 
Originally posted by: jumpr
Steps to a happy life in Northern PA:

1) Have sex with your sister
2) Get a job at a large bank to pay for child care
3) ...
4) PROFIT!!!!11
Click to expand...
Actually, I think in his case its more like:

1) Profit
2) ...
3) Sex with hot single wimmin who are not mothers!

 
Also, you work at the bank, so you get to see lots of people. You are one of the richest people there probably. You'll find someone.
 
Originally posted by: SuperTool
Also, you work at the bank, so you get to see lots of people. You are one of the richest people there probably. You'll find someone.
Click to expand...

Yeah, but by making all the money, i attract the girls who have kids. I wont want to be a sugar daddy, nor do i want to get and STD. So i am going to keep it zipped up while i am here, unless i find a virgin.
 
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