The Dumbest Deaths in Recorded History

Amused

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Apr 14, 2001
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Feel Free to add your own verified stories of dumb deaths...

The Dumbest Deaths in Recorded History

Attila the Hun:
One of the most notorious villains in history, Attila's army had conquered all of Asia by 450 AD-from Mongolia to the edge of the Russian Empire-by destroying villages and pillaging the countryside.
How he died: He got a nosebleed on his wedding night.
In 453 AD, Attila married a young girl named Ildico. Despite his reputation for ferocity on the battlefield, he tended to eat and drink lightly during large banquets. On his wedding night, however, he really cut loose, gorging himself on food and drink. Sometime during the night he suffered a nosebleed, but was too drunk to notice. He drowned in his own blood and was found dead the next morning.


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Tycho Brahe:
An important Danish astronomer of the 16th century. His ground breaking research allowed Sir Isaac Newton to come up with the theory of gravity.
How he died: Didn't get to the bathroom in time.
In the 16th century, it was considered an insult to leave a banquet table before the meal was over. Brahe, known to drink excessively, had a bladder condition-but failed to relieve himself before the banquet started. He made matters worse by drinking too much at dinner, and was too polite to ask to be excused. His bladder finally burst, killing him slowly and painfully over the next 11 days.


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Horace Wells:
Pioneered the use of anesthesia in the 1840s
How he died: Used anesthetics to commit suicide.
While experimenting with various gases during his anesthesia research, Wells became addicted to chloroform. In 1848 he was arrested for spraying two women with sulfuric acid. In a letter he wrote from jail, he blamed chloroform for his problems, claiming that he'd gotten high before the attack. Four days later he was found dead in his cell. He'd anaesthetized himself with chloroform and slashed open his thigh with a razor.


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Francis Bacon:
One of the most influential minds of the late 16th century. A statesman, a philosopher, a writer, and a scientist, he was even rumored to have written some of Shakespeare's plays.
How he died: Stuffing snow into a chicken
One afternoon in 1625, Bacon was watching a snowstorm and was struck by the wondrous notion that maybe snow could be used to preserve meat in the same way that salt was used. Determined to find out, he purchased a chicken from a nearby village, killed it, and then, standing outside in the snow, attempted to stuff the chicken full of snow to freeze it. The chicken never froze, but Bacon did.


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Jerome Irving Rodale:
Founding father of the organic food movement, creator of "Organic Farming and Gardening" magazine, and founder of Rodale Press, a major publishing corporation.
How he died: On the "Dick Cavett Show", while discussing the benefits of organic foods.
Rodale, who bragged "I'm going to live to be 100 unless I'm run down by a sugar-crazed taxi driver," was only 72 when he appeared on the "Dick Cavett Show" in January 1971. Part way through the interview, he dropped dead in his chair. Cause of death: heart attack. The show was never aired.


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Aeschylus:
A Greek playwright back in 500 BC. Many historians consider him the father of Greek tragedies.
How he died: An eagle dropped a tortoise on his head
According to legend, eagles picked up tortoises and attempt to crack them open by dropping them on rocks. An eagle mistook Aeschylus' head for a rock (he was bald) and dropped it on him instead.


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Jim Fixx:
Author of the best selling "Complete Book of Running," which started the jogging craze of the 1970s.
How he died: A heart attack....while jogging
Fixx was visiting Greensboro, Vermont when he walked out of his house and began jogging. He'd only gone a short distance when he had a massive coronary. His autopsy revealed that one of his coronary arteries was 99% clogged, another was 80% obstructed, and a third was 70% blocked....and that Fixx had had three other attacks in the weeks prior to his death.

http://moronland.net/moronia/moron/1071/
 

Turin39789

Lifer
Nov 21, 2000
12,218
8
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http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tycho_Brahe#Death

"Tycho died on October 24, 1601, eleven days after straining his bladder during a banquet. It had been said that to leave the banquet before it concluded would be the height of bad manners, and so he remained. His bladder, stretched to its limit, exploded; however, this is regarded as impossible by most physicians.

Recent investigations have suggested that Tycho did not die from urinary problems but most likely from mercury poisoning: toxic levels of it have been found in his hair and hair-roots. Tycho may have poisoned himself unintentionally by imbibing some mercury-containing medicine. Some have even speculated that Tycho may have been murdered, possibly by Kepler[3] - though there is no evidence for this. Yet another theory is that he was treating his syphilis with mercury leading to an overdose[citation needed].

Tycho Brahe's body is currently interred in a tomb in the Church of Our Lady in front of Týn near Old Town Square near the Astronomical Clock in Prague.

"
 

moshquerade

No Lifer
Nov 1, 2001
61,504
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Robert Atkins:
Creator of the popular diet which stresses protein-rich meat and cheese over carbohydrates.

How he died: Atkins died last April at age 72 after being injured in a fall on an icy street.

Before his death, he had suffered a heart attack, congestive heart failure and hypertension, The Wall Street Journal reported, citing a report by the city medical examiner.

At 258 pounds, the 6-foot-tall Atkins would have qualified as obese, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention's body-mass index calculator.
http://www.cnn.com/2004/HEALTH/02/10/atkins.widow.ap/


Yet people today still follow his diet plan.
 

Mucho

Guest
Oct 20, 2001
8,231
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Aeschylus:
A Greek playwright back in 500 BC. Many historians consider him the father of Greek tragedies.
How he died: An eagle dropped a tortoise on his head
According to legend, eagles picked up tortoises and attempt to crack them open by dropping them on rocks. An eagle mistook Aeschylus' head for a rock (he was bald) and dropped it on him instead.

Might have been the best story he never wrote.
 

vi edit

Elite Member
Super Moderator
Oct 28, 1999
62,484
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Jim Fixx:
Author of the best selling "Complete Book of Running," which started the jogging craze of the 1970s.
How he died: A heart attack....while jogging
Fixx was visiting Greensboro, Vermont when he walked out of his house and began jogging. He'd only gone a short distance when he had a massive coronary. His autopsy revealed that one of his coronary arteries was 99% clogged, another was 80% obstructed, and a third was 70% blocked....and that Fixx had had three other attacks in the weeks prior to his death.

Fixx had a miserable family history of heart disease. Sadly even the best of exercise can't overcome poor genes. His father had a heart attack at 35 and eventually died from one at 42.

Sometimes you are doomed at birth.
 

AStar617

Diamond Member
Sep 29, 2002
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Originally posted by: lokiju
Bob Marley.

Died from a infection in his toe that spread after he broke it playing soccer and refused to have it examined.
Fixed. :(

 

confused1234

Banned
Jun 17, 2006
1,120
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Originally posted by: vi_edit
Jim Fixx:
Author of the best selling "Complete Book of Running," which started the jogging craze of the 1970s.
How he died: A heart attack....while jogging
Fixx was visiting Greensboro, Vermont when he walked out of his house and began jogging. He'd only gone a short distance when he had a massive coronary. His autopsy revealed that one of his coronary arteries was 99% clogged, another was 80% obstructed, and a third was 70% blocked....and that Fixx had had three other attacks in the weeks prior to his death.

Fixx had a miserable family history of heart disease. Sadly even the best of exercise can't overcome poor genes. His father had a heart attack at 35 and eventually died from one at 42.

Sometimes you are doomed at birth.

he was also a smoker before he started to run. running did not in anyway cause his death
 

CrackRabbit

Lifer
Mar 30, 2001
16,642
62
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Jasper Newton "Jack" Daniel (1850 ? 1911), the founder of Jack Daniel's Tennessee whiskey distillery.
Died from blood poisoning in 1911. From an infection allegedly set up originally in a toe, which Daniel injured in kicking his safe in anger when he couldn't get it open early one morning at work ? he had always had trouble remembering the combination.
 

bennylong

Platinum Member
Apr 20, 2006
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L Ron Hubbard died from taking drugs. Church of Scientology is strongly opposed to the use of any drugs.

L Ron Hubbard spent his life fighting against the use of psychiatric drugs, but died from using psychiatric drugs.
 

Leros

Lifer
Jul 11, 2004
21,867
7
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Originally posted by: bennylong
L Ron Hubbard died from taking drugs. Church of Scientology is strongly opposed to the use of any drugs.

L Ron Hubbard spent his life fighting against the use of psychiatric drugs, but died from using psychiatric drugs.

Scientology lawyers are gonna show up at your doorstep any second.
 

bennylong

Platinum Member
Apr 20, 2006
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Originally posted by: Leros
Originally posted by: bennylong
L Ron Hubbard died from taking drugs. Church of Scientology is strongly opposed to the use of any drugs.

L Ron Hubbard spent his life fighting against the use of psychiatric drugs, but died from using psychiatric drugs.

Scientology lawyers are gonna show up at your doorstep any second.

I was just thinking about that as I was posting. Not a smart idea since I'm using my real name.

Well, if you don't see me posting next week, that means the Church of Scientology has killed me and you can add me to the "dumbest death in recorded history" post.
 

Howard

Lifer
Oct 14, 1999
47,982
11
81
Originally posted by: moshquerade
Robert Atkins:
Creator of the popular diet which stresses protein-rich meat and cheese over carbohydrates.

How he died: Atkins died last April at age 72 after being injured in a fall on an icy street.

Before his death, he had suffered a heart attack, congestive heart failure and hypertension, The Wall Street Journal reported, citing a report by the city medical examiner.

At 258 pounds, the 6-foot-tall Atkins would have qualified as obese, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention's body-mass index calculator.
http://www.cnn.com/2004/HEALTH/02/10/atkins.widow.ap/


Yet people today still follow his diet plan.
Well, at 72 you're probably susceptible to a lot of things. And BMI usually isn't an indicator of health.
 

91TTZ

Lifer
Jan 31, 2005
14,374
1
0
Originally posted by: moshquerade
Robert Atkins:
Creator of the popular diet which stresses protein-rich meat and cheese over carbohydrates.

How he died: Atkins died last April at age 72 after being injured in a fall on an icy street.

Before his death, he had suffered a heart attack, congestive heart failure and hypertension, The Wall Street Journal reported, citing a report by the city medical examiner.

At 258 pounds, the 6-foot-tall Atkins would have qualified as obese, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention's body-mass index calculator.
http://www.cnn.com/2004/HEALTH/02/10/atkins.widow.ap/


Yet people today still follow his diet plan.


You can't escape genetics. The diet plan isn't bad, much like jogging isn't bad. That killed Jim Fix, although jogging is healthy.
 

IGBT

Lifer
Jul 16, 2001
17,976
141
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..I remember Jim Fixx. Thought he could eat all the steak n lobster he wanted if he just ran 20 miles a day.
 

91TTZ

Lifer
Jan 31, 2005
14,374
1
0
Originally posted by: IGBT
..I remember Jim Fixx. Thought he could eat all the steak n lobster he wanted if he just ran 20 miles a day.

His diet didn't kill him, his genetics did.

 

Syringer

Lifer
Aug 2, 2001
19,333
3
71
Originally posted by: moshquerade
Robert Atkins:
Creator of the popular diet which stresses protein-rich meat and cheese over carbohydrates.

How he died: Atkins died last April at age 72 after being injured in a fall on an icy street.

Before his death, he had suffered a heart attack, congestive heart failure and hypertension, The Wall Street Journal reported, citing a report by the city medical examiner.

At 258 pounds, the 6-foot-tall Atkins would have qualified as obese, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention's body-mass index calculator.
http://www.cnn.com/2004/HEALTH/02/10/atkins.widow.ap/


Yet people today still follow his diet plan.

Okay, it really pisses me off that people don't read the entire article.

Trager said the weight was added between his accident and his death, and in fact Atkins weighed less than 200 pounds at the time he was injured.

"During his coma, as he deteriorated and his major organs failed, fluid retention and bloating dramatically distorted his body and left him at 258 pounds at the time of his death, a documented weight gain of over 60 pounds," the doctor said in a written statement. "How and why the Journal reported that he was obese, remains the only unanswered question in this pathetic situation."

Not that it's really their fault, shame on CNN for its extremely misleading headline. Whoever wrote that article should be fired.
 

Howard

Lifer
Oct 14, 1999
47,982
11
81
Originally posted by: Syringer
Originally posted by: moshquerade
Robert Atkins:
Creator of the popular diet which stresses protein-rich meat and cheese over carbohydrates.

How he died: Atkins died last April at age 72 after being injured in a fall on an icy street.

Before his death, he had suffered a heart attack, congestive heart failure and hypertension, The Wall Street Journal reported, citing a report by the city medical examiner.

At 258 pounds, the 6-foot-tall Atkins would have qualified as obese, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention's body-mass index calculator.
http://www.cnn.com/2004/HEALTH/02/10/atkins.widow.ap/


Yet people today still follow his diet plan.

Okay, it really pisses me off that people don't read the entire article.

Trager said the weight was added between his accident and his death, and in fact Atkins weighed less than 200 pounds at the time he was injured.

"During his coma, as he deteriorated and his major organs failed, fluid retention and bloating dramatically distorted his body and left him at 258 pounds at the time of his death, a documented weight gain of over 60 pounds," the doctor said in a written statement. "How and why the Journal reported that he was obese, remains the only unanswered question in this pathetic situation."

Not that it's really their fault, shame on CNN for its extremely misleading headline. Whoever wrote that article should be fired.
Or commended, depending on how you look at it.
 

Howard

Lifer
Oct 14, 1999
47,982
11
81
the Journal by the Physicians Committee for Responsible Medicine, a group that advocates vegetarianism
Now that's a misleading name, if I'd ever seen one.